Sadness is weird for me.
It leaks from my biggest smile,
and from tears of laughter.
Sadness lingers with me in a hug,
and when I´m dancing.
It creeps into my mind when I'm alone
or the center of a party.
The urge to cry is there
I simply lack the tears.

Sadness is weird for me
It hides in the corner of my mind
to surprise me when I least expect it
But other times it prances around
waiving a flag as if to show me...
but I know, I feel it
I simply lack the tears

Sadness is weird for me
because it is numb
and yet I feel it so strong.
Because I smile,
even when I want to cry
I simply lack the tears.

There's nothing like a house full
when you're a single parent
and you'd think the mess you find you're in
would be a good deterrent

But there's nothing to compare
despite the tears and all the struggles
to everyday the love you have
and the kisses and the cuddles

And i'll say this from the start
there's no one else i'd rather be
and raise my kids alone
it's a job made just for me

And despite the sleepless nights
and the sticky fingerprints
and the ***** piles of washing
and the room that always stinks

There's a bundle of four children
who are as happy as can be
they really are a rabble
but I know that they love me

We've all been though some heartache
and quite traumatic things
but everyday is worth it
no matter what it brings

And even if the washing
is piled to the sky
and the dog wants to move out
though I can't imagine why

And the plugholes always blocked
and there's arguing afoot
and everyone got taller
from the last time that I looked

And they play on the same server
all laughing with each other
all in different bedrooms
two sisters and two brothers

You'd never know that last night
there was almost World War 3
and a hostage negotiation
over playing DayZ

But rules here must apply
there are chores and a curfew
a sense of order must be kept
even if you're 6 foot 2

I count my blessings as I go
and for each other we are glad
when you raise your kids alone
being both their Mum and Dad.

is when i realized
i gave away the love I needed most
to the people who deserved it the least

I settled & stayed
for the fear of being left empty handed
after all the time, energy & love I invested

when all along it was my fault
for being played & left broken like I meant nothing
by people I gave my heart, time & love to carelessly

if there is something I learned from a heart break
it is that we ourselves cause them
by putting our hearts in the hands
of people who were never meant to touch, experience or love it
and
we ourselves can prevent them

NaNi

It's okay to **** myself, memories will fade away.
I know why I hurt, it's because I choose to stay.
I thought that things might get better,
That you would stop hurting me.
But now I am 16 years old,
And when I look in the mirror there is no beauty that I see.
***** for 9 years and you said I was okay.
Now you are in prison forever,
and my feelings I cannot convey.
You were my cousin which makes it harder,
I have you kicked out of my family tree.
The hardest part of it all though,
is that at times I wish it were me.