Lost all my marbles
from sixteen to sixty nine
The good kinda blind.
Falling in love its a madness
I was in the cemetery again, this noon
Dandelion graves and lost stones
Dwelling atop a hidden hill
Deep within the pines
Not my cemetery
Upon a certain grave
It had my name
One of only two stones with
Still visible words
She was only 17, passing
A long lost to time
For her to be in that particular cemetery
She had to be a soldiers wife
I mourned her
The stone residing next to hers
was worn by wind and time
A dandelion grave
Cemeteries are a morbid habit of mine. The particular cemetary I speak of here, is called Boot Hill. A civil war cemetery. Amanda's grave was one of very few female graves I've found in war graveyards. Her stone said,"With her child." And indeed, as early as it is in this season, that cemetery was covered with dandelions.
Like the fevered blood coursing through veins
Like open sores upon the skin
Like the drums that faltered in the rain
Like the potion quietly bunged within
Like the promise doomed never to be kept
Like the mouth which spoke too quick
Like the palms, too eager to accept
Like the heart that now refused to tick
Born in this world as a innocent cub
Born into a world of temptations and desires
I use to be so scared of rejection and chased perfection
I lost my vision of perfection when I was introduced to temptations
I have had countless dances with these temptations
They just made me feel so free from this pursuit of perfection
This chase has led me astray and introduced me to a world of gray
A world of gray filled with nothing but space and me
I have used every fiber in me to paint my world of gray
By drinking just to sleep when I didn't even believe in me
Running miles for people that wouldn't even get out of bed for me
Doing everything to fit in instead of trying to stand out
Pretending that everything is okay while I was internally bleeding
Giving people chances that didn't even deserve a second one
Having *** just to feel something
Now my world is no longer gray
Its turned into a beautiful shade of white
Ready for me to paint a masterpiece
Time to let this little light of mine shine
And get what is mine....
My homework. You are welcome Lilly.
The snow that once left soft curves
On top of everything ugly,
Had melted away
The world was full and empty at the same time.
Everything was solid yet up in the air
It felt like anything could happen.
There was nothing here aside
From a clean slate.
You know the kind, you never wanted.
A smile of contentment for things left behind
And a sting of sorrow for the things
You weren't ready to lose.
Suddenly the world was full of everything
You had always neglected about yourself.
There was air, the cold kind, that hurts your lungs
Empty of a warm promise yet full
Of a truth, kindly smiling at you.
You smile back, in realization
Life so bleak, suddenly looks
Like clouds are lifting
Warm air heading your way
Touching skin sadly neglected
The road stretching beyond reach
Leaving the truth far behind
Like yesterday's past
The snow that once left soft curves
On top of everything ugly
Now fades into a distant memory.
By Sirenes and Gaffer
I could not ignore
the voices inside my head
who calls my name
and things they said
They target my insecurities
they show me pity
They know where it hurts more
and these voices , they echo
and it becomes , too much to endure
They feed on my sadness
they do love to make me feel less
They whisper in my ears
with high conviction
Things that no one should hear
These voices , they do not go out
they know everything about
each secret , all regrets
and keep reminding me again and again
every second , without giving me rest