2,960 miles between our legs
And you still claim
That you ache for me.
Your body throbs and moans
With no release,
Mine quakes with longing
For an evening or two.
I keep making these midnight mistakes
And you aren’t stopping me.
Your voice haunts my dreams
Almost as much as the curve of your hips;
There have been weeks of unacknowledged texts
But you follow me like a cat in heat.
You lie to me
And it doesn’t matter.
I’m not waiting for you to love me.
You think that’s what I need.
We’re hedonists, and that’s all.
Neither of us could bear the pain
Of falling in love,
So we won’t.
We’ll just be fingertips under the table
And cutting class
And Friday night bathroom stalls.

He craved her skin. She desired his breath.
On her
He dreamed of her eyes. She thought of his hands.
On her
Cascading. Tracing. Feeling.
Her
She longed for his smile. He thought of her voice.
Her laugh
She dreamed of his love. He wanted her touch.
Her skin
They waited for the day they would see each other.
Feel each other.
Hold each other.

And still they wait.

Have you ever felt like you can't breathe?
Like your chest is suffocating, or your ribs turned into plastic bags, holding it all in.

And have you ever felt like you're breaking?
Like every fibre of you is coming apart, every bone in your body is shattering and you're becoming a mass of blood and muck.

Have you ever had so much noise in your head that you don't know what's going on any more? That all you've ever known is going away and there's nothing taking its place...
Not noise because you've got too much on your mind; noise because there's nothing there at all.

And then, after all that, have you ever known silence?
Absolute silence surrounding you, taking you over till you can't even hear your own heart beat. Maybe because it's not there any more...
Absolute nothingness and you don't know what to do.
Complete quiet
Complete loneliness
Complete hollowness

*Have you ever?

The voices in my dreams call me out to play.
They say that it's fun.
I wish I could stay.
They say they miss me and they want me to stay, but every morning I wake up.
I wish I didn't.
I wish I could sleep on, enjoying the voices' company...
But they don't understand.
They think I have a choice. They think I want to leave, but I don't. I have no control. I wish I could sleep forever; never wake up...
.
.
.
But my wrists won't let me touch them and my balcony's not high enough.