You claim you know me,
but never saw me cry,
and I cry alot.

You werent close enough,
never felt my heart beat,
most times it was silent,
the times i felt dead inside.

You saw me that day,
when I took those pills,
you laughed with me,
but didnt see the frown
in my smile.

You never held my hand,
they just needed comfort,
someone who cared and,
understood,now those hands,
are ******,used to be blood,
but now ****** in ink.

Truth is,
I am still attached to a flame that burns me

I thirst for your blood,to have it pump in rhythm with mine,
I thirst for your breath,every time our lips touch
I thirst for your mind,to be in sync with mine
I thirst for your love.

Fill me.

Slit my wrists,
I bleed red just like you
But you only see
My dark skin

My skin life,
these pores are my breath,

My skin comfort,
No one will hold me as tight as my skin,

My skin home,
I refuse to change it,

My skin me,
Let me love me

When you watch the love of your life find the love of his life,and it isn't you.

To know love,you must know pain

She curves marks into her flesh like tattoos,
only with a blade in her hand,and her other hand holding her mouth so no one can hear the screams from within her,
see beauty is pain,and she wanted to feel beautiful so she cuts,
slits her wrists till the blood rushes down her dark skin to the ground,
as if to make a blood covenant with the earth that one day she would look into the mirror and think,
I am beatiful

She smiles
and the stretch of her lips is an expression of the stretch of emotions she is fighting,
those curves in her smile are places to hide her insecurities,
her arteries pump blood of pain and stress
coz her white blood cells gave up on her just like everyone else
and her immunity was low,
guard down
so she is vulnerable for attack in the area of her heart.
She takes pills to make her sleep
hoping she would sleep forever
cz the daytime is just another reminder
that she has to relive her pain over and over again
that’s engrained in her mind body and soul,
her wrists she covers with bracelets to hide the slits and bruises.
She is a pathological liar
with an everyday response to how are you as
I am fine,
im ok,
im good
yet she’s really not..
Certain secrets don’t allow her to leave the house without 6 layers of foundation.
Certain wounds don’t allow her to interact with friends without
covering up her frown with a fake smile like she posing for a camera,
bruises that make her desire death but she even to cowardly to cut her life short
so she cut everything else on her body
and inflict as much pain that would make easier the emotional trauma
and shes too proud for therapy,
shes a christian,
and shes been told over and over again that her anxiety and mood disorders are a lack of faith,
a lack of deliverance,
a seek for attention
so she dares not reveal her medical condition.
But she still smiles,
one of the best actors I know,
shes bleeding inside and she still stands
coz she is a woman who bleeds every month and to her its the same thing.
Believes she has the capacity to bleed and forget
but the mind is a stronghold,never forgets a thing.

You lured a wordsmith with sharper words,
Promised me heaven and galaxy journeys,
Fed me on your words they satisfied me,
Breathed out of the sound of your voice

Then you became homicidal.
You took back your words, the s that made me feel alive,
You stripped me off those promises I  had made my dreams
Now I cant dream,
I lost my trust in words

You couldve pushed me off a cliff instead and it would hurt less.

You cleanse me like a sun bath,
But cant stay together too long because you will scorch me.
I love you
but you are bad for me,
like a tooth falling for a cavity.
You **** me,but i love you
I wanna leave but will anyone love me half as much as you?