It's hard to talk on the phone
Can't quite focus on what they're saying
Stuttering and stammering for words
At loss for what to say
Then you have the words again
You say the words you mean to say
They come out sounding weak and jagged,
Meek and lame
And you feel useless in the department of speaking
Your heart beats and jumps wildly at the attention you never wanted, the attention that seems to put an untold amount of pressure and judgement upon you
You never feel like talking again, except to maybe voice an opinion someone might actually care about
You panic when someone new talks to you
Heart thumping madly to get out of your chest, telling you to get out of this situation

This is not a cold, not the flu
Not something you can get over too

In search of truth

Did I go back and forth

Wandered through mountains

Bathed in rivers sacred

With the pious

Whichever way the blind pointed

With hope and zest me travelled

Every which way I smelled his scent

But round and round is all I went

Wasted lives to know the one who is not

But the feverish pitch of seeking would cease not

What does it take to fathom the ocean

Even fish or whale is clueless of the ocean

It is only the salt that can be ocean

A salt doll I became

Just a plunge made me the ocean.



So all it needs is a plunge.

Mitakuyapi,

My name is Standing Elk of the Yankton Sioux Reservation. This is my formal apology to all The Elders of Turtle Island. I accept full responsibility for my words and actions in the future concerning the Spiritual Knowledge we are about to share with the People of the Americas and the World. My actions and words are none other than my own based upon the Spiritual Teachings of the *Tunjkaśila and the Spiritual Knowledge of the Star Nations. If any Elder of the Red Nation feels that I am wrong in my actions or in any verbal statement, feel free to correct me according to the Laws of the Kit Fox Society that we spiritual human beings have chosen to live by. "If it be necessary to punish a child, do so in such a way that will improve his spirit or mind, but do not lay a hand on him for you may damage the possession of the Great Spirit, His gift of life to you."

As a Red Nation we have lived through dreams and vision of our Spiritual Tunjkaśila, and we have chosen not to stray beyond our limits of the power of our spirit. My personal dream has directed me to contact certain Ikċé Wiċaśa to greatly increase the spiritual awareness that is to be shared with our Brothers and Sisters of the Four Directions. Through my personal contacts, I know some medicine men have agreed 'it is time' because of the closeness of the fullfillment of the prophecies that are vital for our existence as a human race. This sharing of dreams and vision of the Tunjkaśila will strengthen the Foundation of Nations that are sincerely interested in being that element that will be the foundation of the "Thousand Years of Peace."

My hand is open to all those Elders of Turtle Island who wish to share their message, dream and vision with the People of the World; for, I cannot do it alone. Through our teachings, we know that not one individual holds the Knowledge and Mysteries of Life. We were all given a piece of the puzzle. We are all a part of The Sacred Hoop that needs to be mended, and we must make a humble effort in this task if the Seventh Generation, our grandchildren and unborn, are to survive this next awareness. My life was molded around the teachings of the Tunjkaśila that they instilled in our spirit as children. My spirit has directed me in this effort to help our Brothers and Sisters of the Four Directions. I have already chosen not to fail the Tunjkaśila.

Mitakuyé Oyasiŋ
Héhaka Inaziŋ, Standing Elk
Ihuŋktoŋwaŋ Oyaté (Dakota Nation)
February 1996

beautiful
feathers in
red-orange-yellow,
green-blue eyes sing as
quiescent chrysalis cracks,
blossoms into butterfly
blue wings blue sky,
love spreads its wings
wide open, speaks ocean  
blue-turquoise truth, anahata  
through lapis lazuli lips, vishuddha
a kiss on the amethyst-lilac forehead,
ajna to the sky, sahasrara
butterfly flew