If only it was as easy as just understanding..
Belief with parallel action is what we need to master
Most of us know what we need
Many of us know what the world needs
Few of us act on that enlightenment
Therefore remaining unenlightened
If only it wasn't so easy just to remain a bull *******

Lucky are those who have found love
and been loved.

Lucky are those who bear the gift of face.
   Easy is for them to find an easy case
            for their own taste
     - a goal for their own base.

Lucky are those who has an outstanding confidence.
For by it, they don’t live with a doubtful fence.
Freely as they get any wants in their existence.

I give away smiles, pieces of my lies,
        pretending not having rainy skies.
Hiding my Breathless sighs.

Sometimes I am like a rock
   too dull to feel, a surface too rough.
A sense I lost, an unreachable core,
I don’t know how to love anymore.



*© 2014 Pax

The prison you have painted around yourself
You don't even realize your in
When you lie to yourself you harm your mental health
Don't blame this on Satan or sin

I do believe the worst of feelings are better than having none at all
So be happy when it hurts after you fall
A sense of emptiness is what I now fear the most
Its not always with me, but haunts like a ghost
Those groggy late weekends where sleep is a drug
I lay there so lifeless with less worth than a rug
Somebody shoot me, or stab me , or **** me
Good God above just let me feel something

We are biproducts of the same dust we were made of when we first began to exist
All the tiny mechanisms firing inside of us sending flashes of light contrasting with motor oil and ****
And I wonder where you are
cutting in red from the despondant blue cascading and coexisting with the atmosphere surrounging you
and as you light up you tell me that it's true
that even though I may feel it I don't need you
But we both know that I do
So we're out smoking in the backyard
Blunt hanging from your mouth like the icon that you are 
Sinewy and strong
But your own breath chases itself away from you and the feeling isn't far
The feeling that this,
This is all we are: meter and rhyme
And lately I've become increasingly aware of the pale in my skin
The ever present blush the need and fear to let the light in
The way that the clouds align with your eyes but I still get burned
You're dripping ash on me laughing you tell me lesson learned
You cant ever hold what you earned
So you hold me instead
And it's quiet lines chasing cars down the street
All the boulevards align with your ease and my crooked teeth
You tell me to love them anyway
You tell me what to do even if you don't know what to say
And I can't ******* breathe anymore
The garden is closing in
Flashing lights of neon green corresponding with red and blue along the arch of your skin
Tear me in two
While I tear into you
It'll all feel fine.

What you had, provided stability
What you had also caused countless moments of toil, discomfort, and an overall sense of stagnation
What you had, threw you to the side
Rejected; no need for you there anymore
Well if they don't need you
You don't need them
You weren't growing anyways
You were stagnant
And deep down you will always dispise mediocrity
In you or in anyone else
So reject it before it rejects you

It's like you were my spirit’s mirror
You vowed to build me up
I told you I would do the same as we shared our deepest love
You are more than just a woman and clearly not a girl
Within you lies the power to devour and to heal
More than just a girlfriend, a relationship with nature
The source of all primal desire, undefined by nomenclature
We shared such common interests and had plans to build a future
But suddenly your heart switched gears, left mine torn in need suture

Only I could fix those wounds and learn from what has happened
I simply will be thankful and let not my soul be blackened

And I will not hold back when I have the chance to love
When you break your heart it grows back stronger than it ever was