The word emo is used to describe someone who dresses dark and scary.
Or someone who hurts themself.
For me, it’s a word I use to describe my real emotions.
Emo = emotion
I am “emo” because I am emotional.
Sure, I joke around a lot.
I make fun of my own emotions.
I call myself emo just because I like wearing black.
But there’s a reason why I wear all that black.
I’m too afraid to be happy.
I’m don’t deserve to wear color.
I feel like I should always be grieving.
I feel like I don’t deserve happiness.
Why would I?
I always feel guilty for what happened back in the seventh grade.
I could’ve done more.
I could’ve been more useful.
That’s a lie.
I’m useless.
Worthless.
A terrible person.  
The point is that I am the original emo.
Not because I wear black.
But because I am emotional.
Does that make me human?
No.
It just makes me sad.
That’s as plane as it gets.
I’m just sad.

Im dead, supposed to be. I shouldn't be writing now, I'm suppose to be 6 feet under, decomposing.The other way,Ashed.Is this why spirits are always with me?, I feel, hear, thankfully rarely see. Like each time they will let me know "I'm here". I used to see them but I just know something happened back then that made me stop seeing them. I'm weak, suppose to be dead. What if their here to complain, cause thankfully God gave me a chance to live when I wasn't suppose to. And to them It's unacceptable. I'm living, I can feel emotions & pyhsical hurt too. But I can't for humans, lack apathy it is. I don't trust them nor when I try I just can't. I feel terrible knowing that I am considered as a ******. I know a person who is just like me but that person is much better and can cope up itself.Unlike me mind mending as it feel like.Witches are true, I guess. Every day I feel pain. It just goes and leaves, Pins, beaten up,and rarely I get bruises. I feel different but when I explain myself no one would believe. Me who doesn't trust shall not be trusted. I don't get jealous of things but skills yes. Its actually frustating I hear sounds that cant be produce by an animal or human.What if I just totally lost my mind?, since this cant be normal unless I'm imagining it. I can't even be attracted to someone, like yes but not the feeling like living with them or spend years with them. I can't, I just. I DONT KNOW. IM TOTALLY LOST MAYBE BECAUSE AFTER ALL I WASN'T SUPPOSE TO BE HERE, BREATHING. Yet I'm thankful that I do.

Every morning I wake up
To an empty bed and an empty phone
Every morning I remember
That you aren't here anymore

I'm left with an empty feeling
In the pit of my stomach
And an empty future
Where our plans used to be

They say it gets better
That one day there won't
Be this gaping hole inside
Where I had you

But I just don't think
That I believe them
I don't think I'll ever
Be whole
Again