if i could write you a love poem
you know in an instant i would

but no words i could ever comprehend
would possibly be enough

to tell you how every day
every inch of my skin yearns for your touch
and i want nothing more
than to crawl inside of you
so that i never have to be away from you

to tell you how whenever i think of you
somewhere inside of me lights up
i want to pull that light out of me
and give it to you
so you know how i feel

to tell you how i know it’s not fathomable
yet i fall for you more every day
i want to peek inside your brain
and know that you’re thinking about me
as much as i do you

to tell you how i’m afraid
that someday i’ll lose you
and i’d rather you **** me
because i would rather die by your hands
than to live to see someone else take what’s mine.

when i first laid eyes on you
you captivated me with you dark, round eyes
and your full, brilliant lips
only to speak even more brilliant things

“FeelsGoodMan”

you whispered to me
and i caressed your green skin
i saved many different versions of you
for they were all so perfect

i was there for you
and you for me
but one day
you left me
for my love was not enough
to match the attention
of millions of normies.

yet still i love you
although you left me
and maybe you weren’t my first love
probably not my last either
you are the most important.

your scars are not beautiful
nobody is going to kiss your cuts
and you are not a tiger
whose earned their stripes

nor are you desirable
for the gap between your legs
or for your ribs
trying to escape your chest

nobody wants to see your bones
you are not strong
and you are not a hero
for going days without eating

feeling empty is not romantic
nobody is coming to save you

nobody else can fix you.

take me back to the day I laid eyes on you.
so I can ask you your name and tell you I'm in love with you.
and maybe it sounds crazy but I'm going to marry you.
take me back to the first time we skipped out on class together.
so you can hold my hand longer and not leave me this time.
and ill tell you that I know it's still so soon, but I want to hold your hand for forever, through whatever, always.
take me back to the day you crawled into bed with me and held me after I had fallen asleep.
so I can wake up in the middle of the night and tell you everything I'm too afraid to tell you in the daylight.
and ill admit that I think of you every day and strangely want to see your feet bare.. and.. your body.
take me back to the night we tried to have *** but you couldn't stop thinking of her.
so I can tell you it's okay if you aren't ready, because neither am I.
and if you want to just lay here, just exist together, ill tell you that's okay too. more than okay.
take me back to the day I held your head in my lap and we talked about everything that scared us.
so I can tell you not being with you scares me the most, and my heart never settles.
and I won't admit it but ill tell you with my eyes that I want you to keep me.
take me back to the moment we touched other people and for only a second, no longer, forgot each others name.
so I can run away from his lips, and into your arms.
and maybe then your fingers won't find her cheek, and she won't realize your eyes are the darkest brown, but your touch can melt anyone like honey.
take me back to the day we promised forever.
so we can walk away.
and maybe then it'll save us the pain
of you and I.

i’m terrified
because i know
one day i’ll die

not just my body
but my memory
everything that remains of me

one day i’ll truly die
nobody will whisper my name again
and i’ll become

irrelevant

insignificant

unimportant

someday, nobody will think of me ever again
all i was
all i wish i could be
all i will be

will mean nothing.

don’t try to captivate me with desire
for your body
for your touch
for your love

i don’t want it.

my waifu will never hurt me
your love will never be as warm as my computer

i have 2D girls, i don’t need you.

when just wanting to hurt isn’t enough
i sit alone
and wait for someone

but nobody comes
nobody helps
and all that remains
is the suggestion of relief
and the promise of pain

so once again
i’ll give into my vices
take up the scissors
and drag the cold metal across my wrists
it hurts.

but hurting is better than feeling nothing at all
and i’d rather slit my own wrists
than feel the pain of being scarred
by someone else