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Caroline Grant Mar 2016
I am who I am
I am powerful
I wonder about the sky and sea
I hear the voices of fallen angels
Their cries, their screams and their smiles
I see the reflection of beauty
The beauty of me
I want everyone to believe that
I am who I am

I pretend to be other person in the room
The other me
I feel the hope flaring
I touch it; the ball of light and darkness
I worry that it’s leaving and is going to go
I cry for the ones that have left
I am who I am

I understand a lot of things
But the rest remains a mystery
I dream of me and what I’m like
I try to focus on dreams and happiness
I end up failing and sadly dying
I hope for the dream
I desire for the reality of life
To come and see what I have to give
In exchange for my life
I am who I am
And that will never change
This is who I am so I give myself up for the judgement of the *****.
Caroline Grant Mar 2016
If I wrote a suicide note, what would it say?
Would it be for tomorrow or today?
Would it be full of goodbyes or would I let people know
how I died and why I had to go?
Would people see me as weak or brave?
Would they cry when I’m in a grave?
Will my friends grieve or celebrate?
Will they think it’s great?
Would I be the victim or the suspect?
Would they be wrecked?
Did I push myself all the way to death?
My fear playing with my breath.
If I wrote a suicide note it wouldn't be a suicide note after all.
I was looking over the edge when you made me fall.
You pushed me over and you watched me die.
That's not suicide, that's homicide.
A note with no goodbyes, no last farewell.
No apologies, not stories to tell.
A straight forward homicide report will do.
With the victim listed as me and the suspect, you.
This is what mine would say although I would totally add more to it.
Caroline Grant Mar 2016
This is a thing, a thing of which can never stop
This is it; this is what we are up against
This is what we use – we are the user
It is the used
We have a thing we call a mind
A house – a smile, a forgotten memory
Something that has eyes, ears and a personality
Of which we use to a certain extent
Then we stop.
Caroline Grant Mar 2016
You hold the world inside your smile
I keep your smile in my eyes
You imprison my heart in denial
I feel at home in your lies

I hold Hell inside of my spirit
And I use my heartache to burn
The world is on fire, can you hear it?
The ashes can go in my urn

The world is on fire, and I'm laughing
I can't help but smile at the flames
As the people around me are gasping
And my selfish ways are to blame

I wait till there's nothing but ashes
And cry at this sad, empty place
My memories are gone in short flashes
And the glow is erased from my face
Caroline Grant Mar 2016
You
I am fascinated by all of you
Will I and you forever be true?
The way your lips melt onto mine
It tastes like you, so divine
Their shape and definition
This love our only ammunition
They fit so perfectly
For this long eternity
Put them on mine
And we will combine
I remember that one moment
Over me, you have the potent
It was between a look
Something that from me you took
And that one little kiss
Where the worlds will stop
My legs threatened to drop
For the briefest time
That pure and unstained prime
The only thing between us
The away time to discuss
It is the anticipation
It is the stimulation
A moment so intense
To find out what were up against
Then we finally realise
I have you for my paradise
And it is only just beginning
  Mar 2016 Caroline Grant
phil roberts
I have this friend across the pond
As bright as clear-night stars
Intelligent and talented
And faster than souped up cars

But she has her flaws, alas
As all the best poets do
I know this to be a fact, of course
Who hasn't got one or two?

After all, it has to be said
Perfection is lack of character to me
So I'm keeping my eye on my talented friend
And watch as her mind flies free

                                                By Phil Roberts
Caroline Grant Mar 2016
A little girl scared to reach out.
She hesitated with doubt.
Always too scared to ask.
Small and clueless hidden behind hates mask.
No one heard her screams.
People laughed and said honey it's not as dark as it seems.
Held close by her partner at night.
The littlest mistakes causing largest fights.
I'm sorry baby.
Nobody could save me.
This little girl wandered her mind.
Aimlessly wondering what she could find.
She found a razor and began.
Blood streaming down her hand.
She found a broken relationship.
I'm sorry I just couldn't get a grip.
This little girl went on.
Shy and helpless as a fawn.
Then as she grew older.
She became bolder.
A drink here and there.
A mind filling her head with dare.
Take one more pill.
You haven't yet had your fill.
One two three four.
Now that I've started why not take more.
I was in a hospital that night.
The doctors walking past were blurs of white.
This little girl has taken too many.
This little girl has had plenty.
She came in a broken masterpiece.
As far from sober as she could be.
That night the girl decided to be strong.
She jumped of the building to where she thought she belongs.
That little girl jumped in her mind.
Don't worry she is perfectly fine.
On the outside anyways.
We will just say it’s been a rough couple of days.
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