3rd grade, chipped tooth from swinging on the monkey-bars that were still wet from the rain. I held your hand even if you were a girl, too. How everybody teased. You kissed me behind the stacks of books in the library. I thought about telling my mom. I wondered if god saw.

2. 13 yr old stealing eyeliner from the drug store across the street. You blowing smoke into my mouth after-school. I was spell-bound. You taught me words like "****". You forgot my birthday and I gave myself a bruise punching you in the face.

3. he was in the hospital. I couldn't sleep for three days. I never told him about any of this. We spoke only on the phone and I wish he were sincere when he was sober. I realized then that people are revolving doors. I still love him. I think about him often. He's a best friend.

4. You made me lose so much blood. I thought we were more than child's play. You showed me your favorite artist and I showed you my soul. You took your coffee dark and I tried so hard not to smoke in front of you. He stared at my legs and I told him I took three different types of pills that are supposed to make me happy and he just kept on staring.

5. loading.....

I've said goodbye at bus stops
In coffee shops, on planes.
In broken down hotel rooms
and in sudden summer rains.
I've said it without speaking
when I could not find the words.
In parking lots, at funerals
and to the song of birds.
When forced to without meaning it
I've even said it too,
but the hardest thing I'll ever do
is say goodbye to you.

the moonlight caressed her cheeks
as she took a long drag from that cigarette
between those
long, thin fingers.

cotton *******,
***** socks,
skinned knees.

shimming along with the rich sounds
of guitar and French tongue.
soft coffee bean coloured waves in her hair
bounced along with the rest of her body.

warm vanilla perfume,
dabbed behind her ears.
i wanted to be behind her ears.
i wanted my lips pressed up against there.

i wanted to line her shelf-like collarbones
with strawberries
from my teeth.

i did not just long to taste her,
i wanted to savor her.

she's the kind of woman with the scent
you'd remember forever.

you could write an entire novel about
the slight curvature of her spine,
and the way it would mold into the
pit of your stomach perfectly.

she's a 'once in a blue moon'
but with the warmth of the august sun.