Adrenaline flashing through.
I feel it move through all my being.
My bones paralyzed,
My flesh weakened by the strength of my veins.

I can hear the blood
As it rushes through my body.
My head is pounding furiously
My heart is beating fiercely.
Should I, should I not?

I wouldn't know now,
Would I?
For the question I ask;
Can I, can I not?
Can only be answered if I do.

Take the step,
Have faith in my doings,
For adrenaline flows through me.
Scary as it is,
It is to strengthen me if I dare.
So I will.

Version 2
My moonlight eyes
Might have been part of heavenly things.
My fingers
Are angelic in form.
My legs
Slender,attractive and obviously the ones that attracted him more to me.
I am beautiful.

I am not too tall,
But my plumpness kind of fits my height
Perfectly.
Yet,
I am sure he was concerned more
By the backside than the wonderful bump
My chest makes against his.

Why me?
But why not?

I am the beauty of his eyes,
The satisfaction of all his lustful desires.
So isn't one less beautiful than me more fortunate?
For no big bellied man in his richness
Can dare approach a woman he is less satisfied with.

I see it all in his eyes.
My silky skin,
My adorable smile,
And the totally kissable  lips are all he ever thinks of.

But if I am too beautiful to attract a man my own father's father's age,
Then beauty is a curse.

Version 1
Would he have noticed her?
If her face was not as it was.
Would she have been so full of herself?
If her beauty was not so daring.
Beauty is a curse;
Yet she embraced it like a blessing.

"I want a woman who will make my children beautiful"
Was all he ever thought of.
She did give him that,
But they too were a curse.

All five of his daughters reminded him how shallow his life was to wish for beauties.
A constant reminder of how adulterous his wife was,
A crime she always got away with for being beautiful.

Had he been wise,
He would have wished for a beautiful woman as a life partner,
Not a pretty ***** that fulfilled his hopes with a hall in his chest.

Now everyone laughs at him.
Tempted and slaughtered by the ugly duckling he mistook for beauty.
For if beauty is her,
Then indeed
Beauty is a curse!

Version 1
Would he have noticed her?
If her face was not as it was.
Would she have been so full of herself?
If her beauty was not so daring.
Beauty is a curse;
Yet she embraced it like a blessing.

"I want a woman who will make my children beautiful"
Was all he ever thought of.
She did give him that,
But they too were a curse.

All five of his daughters reminded him how shallow his life was to wish for beauties.
A constant reminder of how adulterous his wife was,
A crime she always got away with for being beautiful.

Had he been wise,
He would have wished for a beautiful woman as a life partner,
Not a pretty ***** that fulfilled his hopes with a hall in his chest.

Now everyone laughs at him.
Tempted and slaughtered by the ugly duckling he mistook for beauty.
For if beauty is her,
Then indeed
Beauty is a curse!

You looked me in the eye and told me that I was pretty;
And I believed you.
You looked me in the eye and told me that I had a beautiful smile;
And I believed you.
You looked me in the eye and told me that I had gorgeous eyes;
And I believed you,
When you said they light up like stars, and make my beauty shine like the sun. I smiled;
Believing in the words of my man!

And then you came home,
Staggering like a thief in your own house;
I asked how your day was and you hit me.
The face that was once pretty,
you cover in bruises!
The smile that was once beautiful,
Is no longer visible as you have removed all of my teeth.
The eyes that were once gorgeous are now swollen and scare even my own children.

You call me names,
Starting from a dog ending to a nothing;
And I cry,
Believing in the words of my man!

Today as you walk past my swollen,bruised and toothless dead body covered in blood and laying in a wooden coffin,
I believe you,
When you say I am dead.
Believing in the words of my man!

You looked me in the eye and told me that I was pretty;
And I believed you.
You looked me in the eye and told me that I had a beautiful smile;
And I believed you.
You looked me in the eye and told me that I had gorgeous eyes;
And I believed you,
When you said they light up like stars, and make my beauty shine like the sun. I smiled;
Believing in the words of my man!

And then you came home,
Staggering like a thief in your own house;
I asked how your day was and you hit me.
The face that was once pretty,
you cover in bruises!
The smile that was once beautiful,
Is no longer visible as you have removed all of my teeth.
The eyes that were once gorgeous are now swollen and scare even my own children.

You call me names,
Starting from a dog ending to a nothing;
And I cry,
Believing in the words of my man!

Today as you walk past my swollen,bruised and toothless dead body covered in blood and laying in a wooden coffin,
I believe you,
When you say I am dead.
Believing in the words of my man!

There was a light in my heart,
Illuminating straight into the depths of my fears.
Way far away from the red embedded on my lips.
There was a light,
Beyond the glow

Pretty as I looked,
The joy I felt, was nothing compared to the beauty I saw..
For it was a joy,
Beyond the glow of my gloss.

The joy brought by the beauty in my hard work,
The beauty of achieving my goals,
The glory in the satisfaction of the dreams I dreamt.
That is;
Beyond the glow.

I got the message you sent when you didn't speak,
When you closed your mouth,
And said nothing at all;
You said a lot.

I saw the depth of care in your eyes when you didn't look,
When you closed your eyes,
And disregarded my presence;
I saw a lot.

My heart speaks to you,
And my eyes always look up to you,
Yet;
It matters not to you.

You are the one who got away,
And I the one who cries in the dark
With a bleeding soul.

A soul once surrendered to you,
Yet rejected by you;
Its vessel.

Only very few words are said by a bleeding heart

Could you be the one?
To stand with me
And make me cover bigger widths..
To walk with me
And make me reach longer lengths..
To hold my hand
And lead me to greater heights!

Should you be the one,
To kiss my lips
And make my hips shake with pride..
To touch my heart
And make my dreams be wide..
To tempt my mind
And make me be wise!

Would you be the one?
To make all my fears
Disappear..
To make all my dreams
Appear..
To just let love flourish beyond the
Ear!

Am tired of living
At the mercy of others.
Feeding from the hands
Of the donors.
Following their plans
For they are the leaders.
If my destiny would falter
For they are the vultures
Preying on my dreams
For only I possess
The power of the dreamers.
Am just tired of living at the mercy of others!

Does my mirror lie?
Or maybe my vision is just blared.
I was told that I was created
To bear both beauty,
And wonders.

So I wash my body,
Clean my face,color my eyebrows
And glitter my lips.

I awoke to view the mirror,
In the early hours of the morning,
Before the water and the glitter I beheld.

I was molded by him,
His gentle hands caressed my face,
Even as he breathed in me
The spirit of life.
Gave me strength,vision and a will..
So that I can be wonderful.

Yet,
I cannot see any of them in the mirror..

I saw you last night,
I don't remember everything you wore,
But the smile I cannot forget.

You extended your hand
For me to hold;
Like you even needed to.
I hold on to you even without
Your hands.
Maybe our souls are attached,
But that is too big an illusion..

You took a step before me,
I hated that you left me behind.
Then you guided me to take it
With you..
I trembled,afraid to fall,
Yet I already fell for you.

Your strong hold I felt,
For your grip was too much for me to behold.
From it,
I got the spirit to run..
Run with you,
But maybe it was too much,
For I ran away from you.

Its so dark!
Its not the state of darkness
That I hate;
Its the fear it brings with it..
The fear of not knowing
Were I am.

Wow!
You are so bright!
Straight from the abyss of
My darkness
You light me up.

Yet,
Its still dark.
Its not the darkness
That I hate;
Its the fear it brings with it..
The fear of not knowing
Were I am going.

So be light,
Take today and
Illuminate me
From the dangers of yesterday
Through to the hopes of tomorrow.

It
Wouldn't
****
If
It
Wasn't
Real
So
Bite
Me
Again
And
Immortality
I
Will
Gain.

In the absence of breath,
There is no life.
Movements cease,
Songs make slight sense,
Agony overrules,
As smiles disappear.
Laughter is mockery,
Joy is very dim,
Happiness is blurry.
And only pain is clear.
In the absence of breath,there is no life.
But what happens in the absence of life?

We are exclusive,
Always will be..
In fact,
We are what common men would describe as true love.
But we aren't common..
Oh,are we?
Otherwise we would be lovers.

Questions of how long my heart will beat for you flood my mind,
But I don't want them answered.
For the answer I already know.
Its threatening,scary and heart breaking..
But its true.

The rains will fall;
As they always do.
The winds,
Of all kinds;
Will blow to all directions..
Yet,
As soon as the sun shines again,
All will be as it was;
For it never changed.
I will secretly hold on..

Bring it on,
Your worst or your best;
I dare you.
For I can never control my heart against your charm.
And so,
I will secretly hold on to you..

The man who makes me bleed,
With invisible blood..
The only one who cripples my heart,
With his innocent smile..

Against all odds;
The weather,the climate.
The colour,the race.
The age, the stage.
The hate,the hurt.
The anger or the hunger.
I will secretly hold on to you,
And you will never know it..

I have a lot of them pretty clothes;
Short,long or medium skirts.
Shabby,decent or just mere blouses.
Short,long or medium dresses.
But none can compare to my favorite little black dress.

Its neither too short,nor too long.
And I cannot even classify it to be medium.
Its entire length is knitted in black
As it has stitched in white,
A belt that covers the waist.
Its not a very big belt though,
Too little actually.
But I love my favorite little black dress.

It is not because I can wear it to any occasion that I love it;
I can wear it to dinner,
And yet be comfortable enough to select even my favorite musozya to be my meal.
I can dance for the whole night when in it.
I can meet even the scariest of inlaws in it,
And shake the hands of the most respectable people while having its belt clenching my waist.
My favorite little black dress.
I just love it

And it is not because I got my first kiss in it.
Nor is it because I had just taken it off,
When my lover devoured my flesh and took my innocence with him that night.
Leaving my decency to cling only to my skin,
As if it is on my favorite little black dress.

I kicked a ball in it,
As the boys whaled 'goale! Goale! Goale'
Thinking that since I had a dress for a garment,
Then the goal,I would surely miss.
And yet I didn't.
In my favorite little black dress.

That night when I danced with him,
I wore it.
I could tell my father too,
Appreciated how lovely it made me look on this day,
As he led me to the dance floor,
And yet;
I wasn't even the bride.
My favorite little black dress.

I don't want just anybody
To penetrate through;
No,I won't give room to one
Who is no knight.

For I was not born in luck,
Or raised in plenty.
I was born to be queen,
Not just mere princess for a dress

So take your sword,
Go beyond your birth right
And claim your place..

In my heart,
I will crown you king..
With my body,
I will exhalt you..
Yet still,
With my soul,
I will glorify you.

So with your helmet,
Protect me..
Even as you guard your home.
For it is my heart that houses you.
You, my Knight.

The ties that bind us are the very ones that separate us.
We have shared a lot of things in common;
And yet most of those common things put a barrier between us.
We have laughed at the same jokes,
Danced to the same drums,
Rejoiced to similar songs,
And sang in similar tunes;
The ties that bind us together.
And yet our differences are always ever apparent.

For as I laugh with tears in my eyes,
You laugh with your teeth,
Hiding the very emotion that binds us from the world to see;
As I dance to the budima drums,
You dance to the drum beats of the kuomboka,
Having the sound that binds us, separate us by how its produced.
I dance to ching’ande and you dance to mfukutu,
Excusing the world from seeing our similar steps.

Oh, the ties that bind us.
I sang Jesus loves me when you sang give me the bible;
Spreading your words in Bemba as I spread mine in Tonga.
How the ties that bind us are so quick to separate us.

Wow, I say to myself as I look at you standing right in front of me.
The bonds of our ties grow stronger as we grow older,
And yet weaker with the passage of time;
We share from the same vein, bound by blood forever;
And yet the differences in the ******* that provided for us separate us.
We come from the same womb,
And yet the little differences in the arrangement of our protein molecules make us different.
Indeed the ties that bind us.

Our mother rejoices in calling us all her children;
And yet the men that take pride in us differ.
Our father sings songs of the products of his manhood;
And yet the women that sing along with him sing differently.
He is the tie that binds;
And he the one that separates us.

'Who are you?'
Is the one constant question I ask myself?
'A man.'
The answer has come, most times.
Even when I wasn't asking.

Your nature, stature and even adventure is that of a man.
But that is all you have for a man.
For your words are eternal, and though you are only an image of God, I see him in you.
You speak with a foreign tongue, not only in words, but in acts as well.
Mortal man!
Immortality rules your being, as your wisdom would subdue the earth as it has my body.
My heart beats for that man, who speaks of everlasting love.
The love that is real and agape,
As it goes beyond the pleasure of kissing and ******.

Many are those times when I find myself wondering if God, in his very nature has embedded more than just his image in you.
That maybe like Zeus once took the form of a cow,
Jehovah took to your form.
But then for what purpose,
For I am nothing like 'Europa', either in stature or status.
Am neither that beautiful to call for divine attention from such a man as you.
Nor do I hold the crown of a queen on my head to attract a man of your nobility.

May the lord forgive me for using such words that are almost blasphemous,
But all I am saying is that you are the true image of God, yet only a mortal man.
You are A RARE BREED!
And yet like every other man,
You are just a man.