you tore me apart
when you left that day.

i watched you walk away
and it stung just as much as
your words.

i wanted you to turn back
and tell me you were kidding
and that you still
loved me

but you didnt,
you kept walking
and i never saw you again.

today
i have the same pain
i felt the day
you walked away.

the person i was last year
is not the person i am today.
you took that person from me.

that day you used your words
to convince me to let you put your hands on me.
you said you would go find some else.

you ripped me from myself.
ill never get her back.

The sky was gray on that day.
The wind cut into my cheeks, leaving a rosy tint.
Tears welled in my eyes,
From the wind? From the words you said?
Who knows.

As you spoke, I felt you reach into my chest,
And pull out my heart.
You crumbled it in your hand.
But you apologized, so it’s okay,
Right?

As you left, I wanted to reach into your chest too,
And pull out your heart,
And crumble it in my hands,
But I couldn’t move, I was numb.
All I felt was static.

You turned back and said
You didn’t mean it,
But your action spoke louder.

you make me happy.
you hold me when i'm sad,
smile with me when i'm happy,
care about me when i need you.

you care about me.
you're the first to do that,
thank you.

i will give you everything i have,
the world if i can,
if not, the moon.
you always told me you loved the moon.

i love you to the moon and back.

The sea breeze reflects our old memories.
I remember your hand in mine as it slowly becomes numb.
I miss your hand warming mine.

The feelings of the sand and shells under my feet
Brings me back to a place of solitude.
Our body’s intertwined in the seaweed,
I miss your solitude.

The refreshing feeling of the warm water against my cold skin
Reminds me of our joy,
Our laughing faces.
I miss the joy that you brought me.

The sound of the seagulls rings your screaming in my head.
When you would scream that i wasn’t enough,
Then say you loved me.
I miss your “i love yous”

The waves crashing makes me reminisce on times
Where you crashed beers to your lips
And threw that one bottle at me and screamed
Your apology.
I miss your voice.

The laughter of children makes me think of the
Times you laughed in my face
When i told you i wanted to live my life with you.
I miss your laugh.

I miss you.

The darkness has overcome me.
I turn all of the lights off,
Pull the blankets over me.

The warmness of my blankets
Can’t comfort me enough though.
The sun has fallen down,
Followed by my tears.

No one can help me except myself,
But I’m not much help.
I can hear the static of the TV.
My Dad’s still awake.

Cry quieter.
If my dad hears me,
He’ll ask what’s wrong,
And I’m not good at expressing my feelings.

I close my eyes,
Soon I fall into full darkness.