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there is something about the way the trees dance in the wind and how that exact same breeze grazes your skin, makes you shiver, causing you to crawl under your blankets to warm you at night and to shield you from everything bad. there is something miraculously wonderful and beautiful about that. you listen to your favourite bands but they can't seem to explain why this is happening, and yet we are all just stars in a galaxy and once the light dies out no one will flinch except the hearts that we have touched the most and i guess thats why hearts will oddly skip a beat at 4am on a saturday morning. lungs will die out; skin deteriorating but thats okay because i'm sure there is something beyond what our eyes can see. like when people make bucket lists when really they are subliminally planning out near-by life goals. and unfinished novel is processed so you can pick up the pen one day and write again. write until your hand starts bleeding, your heart stops beating. funny how people always complain about the noises cars create and they never stop to hear the sound of trees, brushing leaf against leaf in a summer breeze. there is nothing poetic about a messy room although i wish it could be- i would use it as a metaphor to show that my life is changing slowly. new rims on cars, new boys, new city lights to gaze upon, 12 am walks by yourself with lonely cigarettes and empty words lost in a fire raging society of *** and abuse but i can't seem to put my finger on who. fake tattoos and dark purple bruises. quiet nights yet you feel like the walls caving in. extreme voices in your head. disorders are not poetic but if it brings true awareness i hope one day it will be. do not mask your scars, instead count them. eventually you will die and old soul and smiling child and your stars the remain will continue to shine on for you.

-next i will count the planets

conceptcollection
  Jul 2014 Teressia
Ariel Knowels
I'm falling in love with you
But I can't help but want him
I'm human and I'm young
He looks at me and I feel at home
But I talk to you and I feel free

He hurt me more than I can say
I never cried over him
Not until I felt my heart for the first time
In I don't know how long

But you
I didn't realize it but you picked up my heart
And gave me the shattered pieces
And I pieced it slowly
You talked me through it
And you held my hands while I held my heart
And with you I can't stop smiling

But tonight
When I saw him
I wanted to kiss him
I wanted to hold him down
I wanted nothing more than for him to say
I love you

So what do I do?
  Jul 2014 Teressia
Byond my thoughts
Why do i do this to myself?

I want you.
In silence i beg for your attention.
I just wanna be able to love you & treat you right.

You push me away.
Every chance you get.

I cry myself to sleep sometimes
Cause the feeling of unwantedness you bring to me drives me insane.

Why don't you reply?
Why don't you want me?

Your words say one thing
Your actions say another

Your hands create a beautiful story on my body.
Your lips makes the butterflies in my stomach go crazy.

In the morning you disappear...

I just want to love you like you deserve.
Teressia Jun 2014
i know there's no other girl
who will fulfill my qualities for you
or afford my smile for you.
that's why you shouldn't have
close your eyes towards me.
  Jun 2014 Teressia
circus clown
i've found myself awake to see the sun rise for 3 days in a row.
i want to believe it’s allowed me to remember there is still
pureness around me but it only exhausts me.
purity is something i never fall asleep alongside.
i keep eating strawberries before 7AM.
there is an empty carton of eggs on the counter
that i didn’t cook for myself.
someone told me i look very beautiful when i wake up
but i think that depends on the amount of heavy dreaming i fell into.
when the sun rises tomorrow morning and i catch it, as i most likely will,
i have a message for it. i want to tell the sunrise that first impressions are everything.
if it mattered in the first moment, it matters now.
my sheets are twisted in the way you could never mess them up.
you can tell me the same thing over and over but it’ll still sound new.
everything still tastes like you. you are still the pretty boy.
you are still the sunset i nap right through every evening.
basically, i'm worried about myself and i wish you were too.
  Jun 2014 Teressia
J M Surgent
I loved someone,
Once before.

And that's why I'm so terrified to try again.
  Jun 2014 Teressia
-
I’m trying to act cold
because I wanna feel numb
but inside I’m burning
with love, with madness
for you

I’m trying to push you away
because I don’t wanna be the girl
you walked away from
but my heart misses yours
you know I wanna hug you

I’m trying to look tough
because I am too tired of feeling weak
but inside my chest is a black hole
******* up everything I need
but not you

I'm trying to forget,
but I can't
if only willingness is enough
but it isn't
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