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  Jun 2017 Allyssa
Chris Thomas
Nothing's on my mind
Least of all, you
Because the world scatters its superstitions
In varying shades of blue

Sacrifice your sanity
To chase bliss with calloused feet
Sacrifice your yesterdays
For a glimpse of tomorrow's heartbeat

Sacrifice your piteous condition
For a second chance at history
Sacrifice the bittersweet aftertaste
After you leave what's left of me

Nothing's on my mind
Least of all, you
Because the world spins on emptiness
In varying shades of blue
  Jun 2017 Allyssa
Eliot York
that i've been reading your poetry
(on the new front page)
and,

I ******* love
your words; your worlds;
it's like i'm,
    there. right there,
with you.

you see, i didn't do what you do--
         write my story aloud
--when i was fifteen, or even twenty-two

just an inch off the ground
                        i confided in clouds
stayed lost (was a puff too proud)

that was then, sure, but even today
   (it's 11:11, now)
putting any of it down
committing to this word, not that
this sentiment,
      not that
this meaning
       (and not simultaneously that)
              is walking through fire

and so, for leading the way
           let me just say,
                       i love you

and please,
don't ever stop.
Allyssa Jun 2017
I could tell you how every bit of you flashed before my eyes as we met that very first night,
But how can I explain the way our souls met and fought while my heart thought it was love,
How can I explain the many thoughts that trickled into my head as your fist connected with my jaw and the scream that ripped through me.
What can I say to the mother that raised me who said to never let a man hit me but my god I'd let you do anything to stay because
You're
All
I
Know.
when did I start to believe the lies you fed to me by your hand as the other gripped my thigh and my heart whispered, "This is love."
What led you to use your anger amongst me like an angry pen furiously scratching across a page when the ink runs out because neither the paper or the pen can no longer bare the force put upon either.
What made me to be so submissive to the peppered bruises across my tan skin like purple stains on a linen sheet that you just can't wash out because how can you wash out the memory of something so powerful it
Never
Leaves.
You do it again because the power you hold over me is greater than the cries I let out or the blood that trickles from the wounds you make that stain the carpet because I let you.
I shiver in your wake.
Please, I beg of you, let me die.
Don't let him hit you anymore. He will do it until you perish.
Allyssa Jun 2017
Theres a saying that goes, "once you've made your bed, lay in it."
I supposed I've made my bed,
My choices were the mattress,
My dark desires were the sheets,
My secrets were the pillows I slept on,
My thoughts covered me like my blanket.
Frankly my bed was better left alone,
It was better before you climbed in,
The sheets ruffled,
The blanket pulled back,
The mattress bowing in beside me.
I could hear the crumple of the pillow as you rest your head upon my secrets and covered yourself in my thoughts.
You took my dark desires and made yourself apart of them.
I allowed you to come into my bed
And
I guess that's why my mattress
Is so heavy.
You were the riskiest choice I had made and you piled on,
Sank into a dark desire,
Became hidden away in the pillow you occupied,
Covering me like the
Warmth
You once provided.
You became the bed I slept in,
Rolled upon,
Never let me leave.
Why I had spent so long amongst the bed you helped make always made me wonder why.
Your scent was a permanent fixture,
An added amusement to my suffering.
Thank you for the company that's burned into me.
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