if you're reading this, we must have made it after all.

i do not think i am depressed,
but i've been showing signs of depression.
i'm holding on until
until
until
god knows what/when/where.

i need
something
bigger.
i need
to be
repaired.

I'm too much and not enough,
I'm nothing and I'm everything,
I sleep too little, wake too late,
And I dream too much, want too much, feel too much...
Or nothing at all.
I talk too much and I breathe too fast,
I can't take everything in as quickly as I should,
And I get attacked so fast,
It's like a fury , fresh,  fierce.
I am scarred by the sinews that bind me
And I am scared of
Myself.

At one moment, my life was a rose. Crumbled in the hands of greed only to recover naturally as it grows beneath the weeds.

Sweet evening dove
Are you in touch with your mortality ,
are you at peace with deaths totality , do you
harbor ill will toward the western sun falling down ,
do you understand sadness as you sing so blue and profound   Your a lovely , lonesome lady on a bell tower in a sleepy town
You bring a smile with shared pain as you make your evening rounds , a reflective lullaby blocking every twilight sound ...

I close my eyes
My heart swells
My chest feels tight
Breath in
Then I exhale
All the weight of a wish
And watch dandelion seeds
Rise
Like scattered dreams
And times gone by
Blowing in the wind
When will I see you again
Potential rests
In every grain
And prayers
Cover them in all love
And I'm hoping to
Walk along side them someday