Smothered Divine

Nov 2020

Parker

my world

sometimes i watch the stars cry,
i watch the clouds turn gray,
and the sun to blue.
sometimes i watch the world run cold.
the rivers run dry,
the oceans waves level out,
the lakes stop rippling.
the world stops, and it breaks my heart.

i hate seeing you in pain.

Smothered Divine Nov 2020

The Higher Plane

Somewhere, far far off In an airport waiting area,
huddled between salted chocolate and overpriced keychains.... Stands a girl.
A beautiful, smiling girl.
This girl bought a ticket to leave this town.

This town in the middle of nowhere, going nowhere, so she could be somewhere.
She wants to be a star, remembered for her singing.
The people who fill the other spaces
Of the rest area
around where she stands
Are lost.
Lost in what they know. Lost in what they care about because they grew up being told this is all there is for them.
These lost people swarm around her like bees, except less like bees and more like flowers.
Stuck,
With the life getting ****** from you daily till you die and return to the Earth.

So this girl stands between the chocolates and chains,
Beneath the dome of an airport,
In a place in the middle of nowhere-
Going nowhere,
Swarmed by people-weeds.
And she takes a photo.
And begins her note.

As she boards, she fosters anxiety.
Her plane is not the plane she wants to be on.
See, this girl is lost in a new way.
Sometime before the flower-people, the town going nowhere, and the keychains and chocolate,
This girl who stood found herself.
She found that she was dying inside.
Rotting from the core, like so many diseases.
So she climbed the staircase, buckled her seatbelt, wrote her letter to the world.
Then she went into the bathroom,
This girl who once stood.
And collapsed.
The life energy she once held, gone.
She sliced and sliced and sliced till she
Ascended.

This girl, on a higher plane of reality, standing between the lays chips and novelty mugs in the empty airport climbed aboard that ******* flight and understood that there was no escaping the water.
It was up to her neck, choking her, pulling her under until she could not
see tomorrow.
She saw an escape.

38,000 ft in the air,
She let her heavy, hurting soul be freed.

This girl.
Who smiled.
Standing between the novelty items.
Surrounded by people who didn't understand.
Climbed a flight.
And fell asleep in the bathroom.
Dreaming about death at 38,000 ft.

She is hurting while standing next to the magazines and she is hurting walking to the library every sunday at 6.
And she is ******* dying inside standing there and smiling and asking you why you are so sad.

This girl.
Somewhere far far away.
On another, higher plane.

Oct 2020

Jeanette

The Ocean

When the waves peaked
the sunlight broke
through their belly,
filling the undertow
with stained glass,
blues, and greens.
At the foot of
something holy,
you felt like a child.
If you still
spoke to a God
you would have
done it then.
Instead, you scribbled
short prose
onto wrinkled
receipt paper,
released them
into the ebb.
You thought,
this sadness,
like the ocean,
belongs to all of us now.

#god #sadness #nature #ocean #heavy

Oct 2020

Jeanette

29

I watch the daylight as it creeps across my wall,
it moves slowly, like a dying animal that
wants to live as badly as it has already wished to disappear.

I am bad impersonation of the person I was the day before;
like playing telephone with my body, or becoming a photocopy,
my true self has already begun wane.

Oct 2020

Jeanette

Cheap White Wine

-
You recount in detail the three old ladies
outside of the diner,
how you listened in as they
described the sky to one another.
One traced the swirls of the clouds
with trembling hands;
you thought it so beautiful,
you could have cried.
-
The record player is spinning the blues
through a gravelly veil.
I anticipate the moment
you lift your hand to your heart,
and exclaim:
"I love this next line!"
-
Sadness creeps in late through
your living room window
like the moon diving
into the ocean;
a wave of grief consumes you,
violent and unforgiving,
as you pour us another glass of
cheap white wine.
-
I feel like a thief in the night
when I think about you
on the train ride home,
as city blocks turn to fields,
and back to blocks again.
There is something blasphemous
about seeing you so clear.

#love #wine #friendship #vulnerable #train

Oct 2020

Max Neumann

Fear Of Love

to love a person, is a risk
rejecting this risk, means to
reject love -- what does this mean?

i love a girl called milly
she likes her cousin and
sometimes, i'm scared

imagining her soft skin
these hands, touchin
anotha dude; FUCKK!

but i be good, my friendz
cause i called popz
his old voice calmed me

my popz has become a real
friend by now; he's experienced
listen to dem old ones

you be good, too..

Fo' Life

#love #risk #fear #man #woman #lesbian #gay #bisexual #father #popz