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Shivvy Oct 2024
How I wish, Caro
That you'd not have incompletely left
Had showed your desire more than you let
Less empty reassurances
And sadistic impossibilities
We both knew it would never be,
But you didn't even try to fight
For the possibility of a present
Instead you cornered yourself
With thoughts no descent
The greater probability that a future is nonexistent.
It caused such a drift
And I couldn't even hold on
How might I; when friction won't stay any long
You didn't leave completely, Caro.
You never will.
You never stopped gripping my hand.
You didn't,
But somehow did still
When you corroded the forces binding us so much.
That now,
I can't be wrathed at the situations for prying
As even I,
Want me to stop Trying
For anyone wondering, "Caro", means dear or love Or darling in italian
Shivvy Sep 2024
I sense loneliness creeping in my bones
Its beyond uneasy, you know
I do miss you
Though, I'd never admit that to myself
Even if I'm going through hell,
Cause I like to pretend.
That I'm perfectly fine without you.
That my sky is still a pretty blue
I put up this pretence,
without any help.
The one thing I'm excellent at,
Is lying to myself
Shivvy Sep 2024
You are the knife I twist inside me;
It's not easy to love, now I see.
Shivvy Sep 2024
We are way more in my mind
The most wildest fetish I sign.
But only be abled of dream
Is an unjustified punishment, I deem.
When haven't even touched his skin
How can i be,
Guilty of sin?
Guilty as sin, is the song that describes you and me
Shivvy Sep 2024
Watching me from distance,
My hair dancing softly to the breeze's guidance
I catch the fondness in those eyes
Our looks confront.
He smiles wide,
While I ignite
Shivvy Sep 2024
I loved you
But now after you betrayed me
I still don't despise
Or care or mind
As I don't even try to revive this bind.
Confused, you might be
But this time you won't be let charge free.
Your tainted heart will learn to make sense
That the opposite of love is not hate but indifference
I cared so much, I know you were used to it.
I hate being angry, so I'll retreat to the opposite of it that's silence
Shivvy Sep 2024
After twisting a dagger at my back
For so long with no sound,
You made an unutterable attack
Did you think I'd never find out?
The secrets that left your mouth
For someone else to listen
And now as you try to enlighten,
I'm focussed on what I pen
Because I still love,
I still care,
And I could write it all here
Without you knowing
because you don't deserve to anymore.
How, I'm still so shaken
Yet I cant ask you anything
Because I'm still a craven
But if I could form a question
Perhaps the last time
I'd walk down the memories we nurtured
The most beautifully twisted curves
And ask just this that;
Cara, how did you get the nerves?
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