a
deafening
silence
screams
between
them

he sits
looking
at her
with an
open mind
and an
open heart

she sits
looking
down
hiding
behind her
barriers

one day, he thinks
one day
she will
break through
the barriers
she will
break through
any afflictions
that may exist

he smiles
at her
knowing that
she
is
beautiful

through
the pain
through
the sadness
through
the emotions
through
the fear

she
is
beautiful

for her
his arms
will be open
his mind
will be open
his heart
will be open

he will
give her
the
love
that
she
deserves

from my book "this and that and everything in between" - https://www.amazon.com/author/rickadamspoetry

each night
when I go to bed
I lay on my side
because there are
knives in my back
and knives in my heart

lying on my back
or on my chest
would only push the
knives in further
and deeper

as if they’re not
far and deep enough

I have managed to
remove some of
the knives and
continue to live
while bleeding through
the open wounds

although I suppose
removing the knives
doesn’t matter
at this point

for every knife that
I remove
there’s another one
or two or three that
are stuck in me

I don’t even feel
the pain anymore

I just know that the
knives are there

and so do those who
stuck them there

I remember who
stuck each knife
and when they
stuck it in

and stupidly I forgave
a couple of them
only for them
to stick the knife
in me again

never trust the hand
that stabbed you
even once

if they stab you
once they will
stab you again

some may remove the
knife and heal the
wound themselves
but this is rare

the majority
if not all
of those
who stuck the knife
in you would rather
watch you bleed to
death than remove
the knife and heal
your wound

yet
I am not
bleeding to death

I am
not dying

so
with that
I shall remove
each and every
one of these knives

if anything
each one of
these knives
has only made
me stronger

if I can
survive this
I can
survive anything

no matter
the
personal situations

no matter
the pain

no matter
the sadness

no matter
the conflicts

no matter
the frustrations

no matter
what lies
on the surface

beneath
all of that
is pure
beauty

your heart
wants to be
filled with love

and my heart
has love
to give

so
come
to
me

we shall
complete
one another

we shall
make
each other
whole

our
hearts
shall
become
one

our
love will
remain
strong

no
matter
what

thirty years, it has been
thirty years of pain
thirty years of wondering
thirty years of questioning
thirty years of not knowing
thirty years of crap
just plain old crap
the same crap
over
and over
and over
and over

thirty years

thirty years
of feeling
like
I don't
belong
belong here
belong there
belong anywhere

I'm smart, I've been told
I'm nerdy, I've been told
I have goals, I've been told
I know what I want in life, I've been told

those things I've been told
as if they are bad things
negative things
the wrong things

as if to say
"no, no, no,
you're not cool
unless you're a
lazy unmotivated
*******"

that's not me
never was me
never will be me

so to those
who told me
those things,
the hell
with them

their attitude
stinks worse
than a beer ****

from my book "This And That And Everything In Between"
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07G4W63SV

in the dark is where
I am most comfortable.
it is where
I am my happiest.
it is where
I sit back,
relax
and unwind
after a hell of a day.

in the dark is where
I reflect.
it is where
I sort my emotions.
it is where
thoughts run through my head
like old film
running through
a projector.

in the dark is where
I am in my greatest mood.
it is where
I do my best work.
it is where
I drink wine,
smoke cigars,
write poems
and short stories.

in the dark
there can be
beautiful things.
in the dark
there can be
ugly things.

in the dark
there can be
a lot of good,
but there can also
be a lot of evil
and harm.

in the dark
one can be
left waiting,
wondering
and worrying.
yet in the dark
one can also
find peace,
purity
and wonderful
solitude.

I am
never afraid
in the dark,
nor am I
ever alone
in the dark.
I have
my mind,
my pen
and my paper.

in the dark
there is never
any light.
as there
never was,
never will be,
never
can be
and never
should
be.

she and I argued tonight
we were going out to eat
I wore black pants with white socks
she said that I looked stupid
this is how I dress, I said
you can’t go like that, she said
I can and I will, I said
we argued, argued, argued

she had enough and she left

I drank wine and ate pizza

and I wrote a few poems

one of them being this one

I live in 2300 square feet
of dark cold house.

there are steel canisters
of fresh ground coffee.

there is a coffeemaker
that is old but working.

there is a cedar box
full of discount cigars.

there is a wooden rack
stocked with cheap varietals.

there is a media player
with hours of blues tunes.

there is a desk with pens
and reams of lined paper.

take those away from me
and I will have nothing.