love was a hurricane, mindlessly engulfing me within its core
it came out of nowhere, and i still can’t decide whether it lasted too long, or too short
love felt like a storm i wasn’t ready to endure
i had built a shelter for my heart, but forgot to secure it within

as a result i was left alone in the strong winds of heart ache

love wasn’t always like this, though

at one point, it was kind
it had held me in its arms and convinced me that in the midst of my tangled locks and graying bags i was the sweetest thing it had laid its eyes on
it wrapped me in warm blankets and whispered sweet nothings until my breathing turned steady and my dreams carried me away somewhere love would eventually meet me again

its true, love left me
but i know it will come back
not now,
but maybe in a few days..months...years
it will be back
next time with a brighter smile, and good intentions

and i can’t wait for that.
because i know the second time around, love will be pure
and raw
love will show me a side of itself I’ve never experienced before

its true, love hurt me
but I’ve learned to forgive it
because love comes in many shapes and sizes
and just because one didn’t suit me doesn’t mean i can’t try for a new fit

My used to be second family sat behind us.
The walls of the courtroom beat me more than my heart could.
It was not my choice,
The order of protection was forced.
I was forced to tell the detectives what my parents wanted to hear.
All of this happened because I made a mistake.
I chose a blondie over a brown eyed beauty.
Now for a whole year my best friend is gone.
His family hates me.
Nothing will be the same.
Adams street will always be dull,
And when I walk down that street more moths are born in my stomach than the hope I told you too keep.
Now I hope.
I hope court didn't sever everything we had.
Straight up.

I like pretending I'm infinite.
Nothing can touch me.
Nothing can stop me.
Nothing can hold me back.
I move through the clouds.
I connect the constellations with my bare hands.
The wonders don't stop.
The happiness doesn't stop.
Only the hurt.


-k.f