I always thought it was brave of Wendy,  to love a boy who refused to grow. To get caught up in his wonderlust, to fly and mock the crow.

She let him sweep her off her feet, with dust that shined so bright. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and they fled into the night.

Love is a curse in Neverland, unbroken by gypsy magic of old. Peter has a reputation though, tales among the campfire told.

The crocodile turned its clock back, to synchronize with Wendy's furious cries. The lost boys lined up with tissues, to sob their last goodbyes.

Maybe Wendy fell apart when she returned home, emotion finally giving to tears. Only in dreams will she remember him now, as her Neverland disappears.

Alive,
is a little overrated in my head.
Yes I'm still breathing, my heart is pumping but alive isn't the word- for what I am.
I'm still here in existence, physical form but certainly not alive.
Why not? Well you see,
you and I have separate definitions of alive. To be alive is something you can feel, coursing through your veins, every curve and line.
Pulsing through your brain buzzing with intensity.
Pushing in and out of your body, one way in and one way out.
This is what being alive should feel like.
It doesn't feel that way for me.
Not today, not any day really.
Unless I go to the place where I'm numb the place I may never come back from,
who knows where I'll end up.

We both exposed ourselves in one way or another.
Except I opened myself up
You didn’t, you just revealed the surface
I showed what was inside
My heart
My mind
My soul
But you,
You never cut that deep.

You let this happen… again and again.
You promise, yourself you wont let it happen again.
but it does, it always does.
Why? You ask yourself, why is it just so hard to let go?
You’re counting down the months of this year, this very year, this exact year. You put all your hope, all your prayers into this.

May,

Its almost here.
This is when you’ll find it, this is when its supposed to happen.
What you want, what you think you want.
Will it be everything you’ve wished? Will it be more? Will it be less?

Less, You don’t want less but sometime life -
Life cheats us, cuts us short of everything we want.

Life, is taking all the good I have left in me.
Life, is taking me away from myself.
Life, is the thing that passes you by if you don’t make the right choices but ends too short not giving you enough time.

Time, the very thing you have an infinite amount of but never, never, ever enough.

Enough, You’re hoping you do everything right.
Right, for the ones around you.
Do it the way they didn’t, to see if you can get further than they did.
To see if you’ll be happier than they are.

Because to be enough means to not fail them, to not fail yourself.

In the end
You're left with no more time,
Life is at its end.
Maybe you had longer than the rest or even less
Was it all worth the pain?
The same pain that gives life, is the same pain that takes it.
Was it worth not being happy?
You’d sacrifice your happiness to find happiness.

Kneeling down
        Speaking to God
        His black eyes scream forgiveness
        The sound gives me goosebumps

    You see
                  I've done things most would consider a bit unusual
  But I've always deserved it
     A razorblade horizontally drug across my lips reminded me to never talk back
     Embedding shards of glass in my legs one by one reminded me to never run away from my problems
              
            After everyone died there were questions I could never say the real answer to
          
        You were there to hear the truth, always were
        Beside me, behind me, beneath me
    You never loved me enough to be inside, but it was ok because your mystique kept me inebriated

    The questions never stopped the rooms got smaller and I had to run
       I had to leave. You came with me

    I hated myself for not staying. And when the pieces of glass weren't enough, I understood I deserved a worse punishment, I lit a cigarette and started my trusty chainsaw
   And after I was finished even you shrunk away from me, my flat friend made of blackness where did you go?

       Now all I have is God.
He listens okay, but he's not like you. With my decimated body leaning against my bed, I look into his two deep dark hollow eyes, I bring his eyes closer, into my mouth, and finally he talks back. He says *bang