Do you want to know how to get rid of the person you love?
Lie to them.
Do you want to know how to convince yourself you don’t love that person?
Lie to yourself.
Thats what I did, I lied to myself but what hurt me more was that I lied to you. And although I’ve stopped lying to you, I’ve continued lying to myself, but it's only a matter of time before you start believing your own lies
and when someone comes along and finally starts telling you the truth you will start questioning and answering and doubting and lying, and crying and hoping that someone comes along and shares honesty. But honestly, who's the liar?

i like my body when it is with your
body. It is so quite new a thing.
Muscles better and nerves more.
i like your body.  i like what it does,
i like its hows.  i like to feel the spine
of your body and its bones,and the trembling
-firm-smooth ness and which i will
again and again and again
kiss, i like kissing this and that of you,
i like, slowly stroking the,shocking fuzz
of your electric furr,and what-is-it comes
over parting flesh….And eyes big love-crumbs,

and possibly i like the thrill

of under me you so quite new

have you ever asked yourself where the sun goes to sleep when the moon steals its shine?
what it would be like to be mine?
do you ever twist the the spoon around to make your tongue fit in the dip
do you ever dream about taking random trips
are you amazed by really big ships
and how they stay afloat
and how planes stay in the sky
or the speeding up of time
do you ever miss the one you don't have
and how this wasn't part of the plan
or how being lonely made you find yourself
yet being alone brought your feelings off the shelf
the shelf you dust every now and then
going to classes you wish you didn't attend
but you go cause you're too diligent
and pay attention to boys who are insignificant
but you know you'll find the one that values you
because you do
value the old you as much as the new you
and as much as he used to
as much as he's going to
love you.

I drove into town.
I drove into town and saw you.
I saw you with that confused face as you drove in this town you were unfamiliar with, but seeing me made it familiar.

I drove through that street.
I drove through that street and saw you standing at the foot of an artwork. And you looked at it with such confusion, but looking at me and looking back at it is what made it familiar to you.

I drove past that sign.
I drove past that sign and saw you at the 2nd to last step of the Museum. and you looked down at your phone googling the next destination with such confusion. But the look you gave me when I was dazed in my own town which I lived in, made you familiar.
familiar with the air
familiar with the streets, and what made it bare.
familiar with the people, although you've never seen them.
that ten rand tip that you so generously gave him
and with that same hand you put it in mine
and although at the time
I might not have felt it
to love me is what you wanted.
I couldn't give it to you then, but I want to now.
it just shows how time wouldn't allow

two teenagers to love at the same time
to share these memories we now decline.
memories we're forced to share with others
although the other is neither one under the covers

Regardless of its never return, thank you for that love you've shown
because although we are lost
you are the way home.