Hobbies are there to help distract our minds
Something to take the edge off
Good or bad, taking many forms

My hobbies haunt me
Addiction in disguise
Dragging me down the dark path

I cannot stop
They do their jobs
Keeping me from the thought of you

I have hobbies
Some I cannot escape
I hope you don’t have the same

There are many types of Smiles
Some are happy, some are fake
We all have a Smile
Somewhere, waiting to be awake

The Smiles that we wear can show so much pain
But only to people who want to see
Until then, I will put on my mask
Wondering who I am to be

I’m not supposed to be this way
At such a young age
Others so full of life
I’m stuck here bound to my cage

One day I’ll find my smile
Giving me a reason to be whole
Until then I’ll be here
Waiting for everything to take its toll

I wanted to think you were different
So unlike the rest
I held you close
Growing too attached

Trust is a fragile heart
Just waiting to be broken
I gave it to you
Not knowing the pain you’d give me

I was blind
I didn’t want to see
Knowing how it would end
But I’d always come right back

I held you above the rest
Not wanting to let you down
Before i knew it you were gone
You were just one of the same.

I’m always here to listen
Show you that I care
Even through the hardest of times

You come to me in pieces
So broken and frail
Never knowing why

Bit by bit
I make you whole
Using myself as a donor

Only payment is watching you heal
That smile shining back through
Making you one again

Little did I know you would go back
Cutting me out
Only to be shattered again

Coming back to me
Expecting to be fixed
But I’m running out of pieces

We all see the world in different ways
Experiencing the same situation
But never really understanding it the same

I see this more as an art
Being spoken to individuality
Each having their own story
Waiting to be told

My memory has this funny thing
I can remember words
Other times I can remember environments
But never really being able to combine the two

When I remember times with you
Everything around becomes blurry
But you stand there clear as day
You stick out of the recollection with your beauty

The gorgeous gleam in your eyes
No matter the time passed
This detail stays
The look you gave when you used to love me

I find myself zoning out at times
Wanting to say so much
But never really saying anything at all
Maybe this is for the best

What I think is better left unsaid
Opinions I leave on the inside
Never to spoken nor heard
None spoken by my lips but with the little voice in my head

I listen to others
Their sounds, their stories
Reading their words as they form them
But never really understanding

The same thoughts plaguing my mind
Like a broken record only played for one
Clouding self-confidence and determination
I’m left thinking