The crippling feeling of an emotional blizzard
Hitting all at once
Anger at him for neglection
Somber that I wasn't worth his attention
Frustrated that I wasted longing and desire on him
Timid that he ccould blatantly disregard me so easily
Defeated that I anticipated for something to happen

Catch my sight
Heart leaps
Goosebumps form
I saunter over
Intentions in mind
You shy away
Just out of reach
All hope is lost
Why do I even try?

When I was in eighth grade
I was told to define "love"
I already felt like I've been played
When push came to shove
Played in these stupid mind games

Wondering if he's thinking about me
At the same time I was thinking about an "us"
And what we could be
Would the thought make him grimace?
Or explode with glee?

Why can't he say it?
Why can't i?
I guess neither of us have true grit
I'm just wondering why
Does it make me hypocrite?

No matter the amount of flirting
Neither will admit
My heart's aching
Why can't someone commit?
What are we gaining?

The wondering is endless
Not that I'm helping
For I'm too nervous
That I'll just be babbling
The unknown is monstrous

Emptying my soul
To him would be difficult
Will it fill mmy hearts hole?
Or have unpleasing results?
My emotions are out of control

Reading into everything you do
Hoping for a sign
Or the slightest clue,
That you could be mine
What makes this such taboo?

Soemtimes I just wanna cry
But I haven't got a shoulder to cry on

Sometimes I think I feel a connecction
But I just get hurt when it's unrequited

Sometimes I want nothing but love
But I have no one to share it with

Sometimes I need someone more than ever
But I never get the request filled

Sometimes I can't help but want to be held
But I always end-up sitting alone

Sometimes I want to break down
But I know I have to act strong

One thing
Standing in place of another
Making you have to think more
And confusing most

If we stopped letting things
Symbolize something else
Maybe things would make more sense
To everyone

Maybe the loss of metaphors
Would provide more explanations
In a world of bewilderment
And cruelty

Forever I've been counting down
Deep down thinking that I'll regret
Wanting it to end
But when it finally came around
I knew that woouldn't be the case
I never have to see the four of them again
Have to sit through them throwing food
And making concoctions with their lunch
Sure, they're just boys
But they should know better by now
High school next year and they still can't act right
The minutes going by as slow as possible
How long is this lunch?
Can't I leave?
Haven't I suffered enough?
If only I had somewhere else to run off to

The minutes finally passed
And as I run out of the cafeteria
I feel relief
From my head to toes
My terminal headache suddenly cured
As I walk away from them forever

What's so bad about breaking away from the pack?
Swimming against the current
Being kind in a cruel world

Why is being different considered weird?
Unique being negative
Alikeness encouraged

Since when is weird an insult?
Something frowned-upon
And taunted for

What has happened to our society?
Partaking in one general idea
And striving to fit the image

Why can't we break these walls?
Shatter this expectation
And maybe even rebuild our own

Attraction of two forces
Naturally occuring
Without selection
Without explaination
The process baffling
But leaving some on their *****

You trust someone
To read something you wrote
They mock it
So you try to impress them
And you try and try
But they just keep taking it as a joke
Then you write another poem
One about them
They read it
And suddenly it's great
They don't realize it's about them
And how bad of a friend they are
They think it's so amazing they want to read all my work
But I have let her read it all
And she's mocked them
What does she expect?

Throughout my eighth grade year
I have tried to flourish my writing
You were always there
Teaching me techniques and giving me criticism
Believing in me always

Your sarcasm always made me laugh
And you have a fun way of teaching
I was always engaged in your class
Even when trucking through Shakespeare
You kept me from falling into a pit of confusion

First core Language Arts
Was my favorite class
And I always hated when it was over
Staying for Spartan Time helped
And I was always excited for Genius Hour

You're someone who I will remember
And who I hope will keep a look-out
For my name in a bookstore
I will miss you,
Thanks for everything