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Ezis Mar 2018
There are two things
I tell myself daily

Your happiness should never depend on others

There is someone for everyone

I’m working on believing it
Ezis Mar 2018
Why does this constantly happen to me?
History repeats over and over

I would think I would be used to this
by now,
but yet every time it happens
I feel the same **** feeling.

When will it stop?
When will I learn?

I cry for belonging.

I cry for love.
How I long for someone to come home to,
For a man to care for me
For a lover to comfort me in my distress
For a cover of sleep to encapsulate me
Yet I have none of these things,
I cry for love.

I cry to be held in the arms of my mother.
I am so far from home,
I can see myself sitting with her in my bed
She looks at me the way only a mother could
She makes my heart slow at the sound of her voice
Though I am not home, I am so far
I cry to be held in the arms of my mother.

I cry to feel something.
I go through my scheduled day
With tunnel vision, the world moves on around me
but all I see is a haze of people who say they hate me
I cry to feel something.

I call myself,
The Melancholy Child.
Ezis Mar 2018
What does my virginity have to do with you?

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Ezis Mar 2018
Have you ever
experienced something
that has truly
broken your heart?

Something so devastating,
that it breaks
your soul
your heart
your mind

You question
everything you’ve done
to make this happen
but you can’t think
of anything

Over and over
the thoughts tumble
in your mind
the memories
flow from your brain
to your eyes
the pictures hurt
just as much
crisp and clear
they were made to remind you
of the best times
but all they do
is show you what you lost

The dull ache in your
heart
even months after
the defining event
says I miss you
and aches for
the ability to travel back
a year
a few months
any amount of time
that could rewind
the heartache

But time doesn’t act
that way
Neither do I.
Going back
knowing all eyes are
watching
judging
waiting for you
to **** up

is not friendship
Ezis Mar 2018
I shouldn’t have to justify
my desire to not have *** with you

Don’t make me feel cornered
or small because you say
you want to do all sorts of
things and I say I don’t

Clearly we both had different
ideas of what this was

He told me I needed
affection

Like some ill-treated orphan
or the runt of the litter

I don’t need you or your affection

I thought it was fun at first
but now it’s over.
Ezis Mar 2018
Social media
has ruined my life
my mom says it
was never like this
twenty-five years ago

You never saw
all your friends
hanging out without
you

Or the boy you like
be with someone else
or be caught in a lie

Social media lets lonely
people to act like they
aren’t lonely
and it allows people to
show off their lives
by hurting others

Show off your body
for all the old men
waiting behind a screen
instead of a tree in the park

Show off your friends
to the person you
left behind

Carry on all the
traditions that were
started way back
when they were
your friend

Watch your guy’s new girl
and see her photos with him
and imagine it was you

Social media
posting pictures
leaving comments
counting likes
has ruined more
friendships than
Instagram followers
I’ll ever have

It has ruined my life

And everyone allows it

— The End —