I fear silence.
Not because I will hear nothing.
I fear it,
because I will hear myself.

You've got it good you see if you're not unwanted like me an unnamed burden that is for certain a beast with no beauty a wandering soul with no rest was I that wicked in a past life? I guess I can take striking out but I've done so horribly it's hard to not dwell on it and I know I've written a lot about feeling unwanted but when you get led on by someone you thought was a friend it's like wandering into a job interview and making it far enough to get a call only to find out they hired someone and though it wasn't meant for you at all it stings your pride and beats your spirit to a ****** lifeless pulp

so while I have to indulge my feelings of emptiness and disappointment again my friends just know you aren't a waste of space and if you're in a hole like me you don't just have it good, you have it great

Every time
I look inward
I only see the little keychain
that dangled off the radiator when
the vacuum was on.

Whenever I
look forward
All I see is a swirling pond
and I don't know which wave
to follow

Every time I look at you
I feel remorse
for the promises I wish I could keep

Ad I feel myself drifting
I feel myself sliding.
Falling.

I've got to ask myself
Is it real?
You love me, and I
haven't told you the deal
When I think, I sigh
just keep spinnin' the wheel

It's been a minute
or a milenia
Who's to tell
my mind of mania

It's an awkward answer
to your question within
Just like a lancer
I have to win