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Jul 2015 · 547
The Deep and Dark
Andrew Fisher Jul 2015
Oh, How I missed you so,
In the Deep and Dark.

Where I may start to tremble,
You're tell-tale mark.

Oh, why do I so seldom allow you,
To approach me and control me.
Roll me into a ball.

You're an indomitable beast.
Whose whim consumes me,
Initiates my fall,
I thought this was done.

I fancied you gone,
Lost in the wind.

But here I am. At wits end.
I discover its only for you my knees will bend.
The Deep and Dark.
Jun 2015 · 723
Shits and Giggles
Andrew Fisher Jun 2015
They say its Just for ***** and giggles.

For my Friends and Family,
they won't know the pain,
of waking up and dying every day
Wishing that you could just feel the same
as you did back in 5th grade,
with that smile on your face.

Now you just sit feeling like a disgrace
Needing, wanting, craving the fade away,
In the depths of your emotions,
of the simple,
the everyday

"We love you" you'll hear them say
All you want is for them to just stay away
Leave me alone till I turn grey
So I can grow lonely,
And sad
and decay

...Nay...

We should fight.
Fight for today,
So tomorrow I can gaze upon your face and well say:

****. How did we do that. How did we come this way?

Was it fate, that here we lay next to one another, as the sunlight fades.
Its life again, Im feeling brave
But your gone again, fore here Ill stay
A patient puppy waiting for the rain to go away
and the curtains to rise and reveal your open arms for me once more.

Wait. Please stay, there is no chance for me to go that way!
Please wait, Stay,
Ive already had enough of change,
If I desire anything its that you change the words you say.

But I love you. and Here Ill stay,
patiently awaiting our reunion days.
If I must Ill fade away,
So I can save you the happiness
of my lost days
I decided to take a jab at writing again, I've been depressed for a long time and I guess Im just trying to see what I can say about it.
Jun 2015 · 541
Lost and Screaming
Andrew Fisher Jun 2015
Lost and screaming,
I gaze at the young child as it pulls on its mothers arms,
She who is tired and weary attempts to calm the child,
Heroic... but futile. The child wants a new lego set, and by the look on his mothers face it seems like he might get it.

He knows not of the pain she felt when she brought him into this world.
He knows not of the sacrifices,
Nor the hardships.

When he is older perhaps he will feel guilt. Or remorse.
For now, he knows joy.
Joy as his mother lifts down the set into his outreached arms like deliverance its self.

I chuckle to myself, and sip my drink.
Out of the corner of my eye I see another small child,
Standing alone amongst a sea of strangers.

She is looking around, confused at first,
Then her gaze grows more frantic as the moments pass.
Her lip begins to quiver, and a small diamond falls down her cheek.
She does not cry.
She does not move.

Of course she is not aware that her mother is merely feet away browsing the aisles,
but to her... to her she is lost.
Lost to all those around her.
Invisible and alone.

Of course this only lasts for a few moments until her mother returns with open arms and and a warm smile.

I pay for my drink and stand up to leave.
In many ways I relate to the children.
Constantly grasping for something new. Unheard of, exciting.
Seeking guidance and protection, Respite from the flow of life.
Idk, I haven't written anything in a while so I kinda just came up with a little short story thing. Please leave feed back and comments so I can hopefully get better (hopefully)
Jul 2014 · 574
My Tears from the Faucet
Andrew Fisher Jul 2014
Death is like lightning.
It can come like a thief in the night,
My heart is broken every time I try and fight it.
Weeping in solitude,
At the emptiness laying on my bed.
It's just dripping with tears from the faucet.
Jul 2014 · 1.0k
Moving on.
Andrew Fisher Jul 2014
Standing here... For the last time
I am consumed with the necessity to feel.

However, despite my best efforts I can do not but sit and observe
This strange lack of feeling
The black emptiness that flows around the others trimmed in gold.
I realize it is the one fact that remains after all the chaos
... I will miss this place.
Maybe not right this second,
Perhaps not even tomorrow.
But someday... one day... I will weep.
For these were some of the most beautiful days of existence.
And I had the privilege of living them.
This was written at and during my high school graduation ceremony, I hope you guys will enjoy it.
May 2014 · 729
The song on the Dance Floor
Andrew Fisher May 2014
Life passes by without a second glance,
They say if you blink,
Well then you'll miss your chance.
And now here I am left to think,
That perchance, all she had ever wanted to do was to dance.
2nd draft
May 2014 · 513
Summer Breeze
Andrew Fisher May 2014
Summer Leaves begin to Roll,
Like the Gentle Breath of the waves on a Smooth and sandy Beach,
While Enchantment Steals thy breath away from those star crossed Lovers,
And already I feel the steady and Persistent tug of my Mind,
Slipping and Falling from that Gentle Longing of what could be,
Into the Cold, Dark, and Gloomy reality of what truly is.
Although the Innocence of my Ignorance will soon Fade Away,
I take private comfort in the realm of my Dreams...
And the Future they *Pretend to Hold.
Andrew Fisher Mar 2014
This is me

I am from the wet and sticky.
I was born in the water, yet, somehow I ended up in the mud.

I am from the hopeful cooing's of my sisters,
From the moment when they had held me up,
They said 'you will be king'
They must have forgotten about the Fan...
As I raised my hands towards that light,
The sounds I heard in my head became the steady and rapid chop of the blades of disappointment and failure breaking upon my skin

I am from the school of Hard Knocks,
The place where you were kicked down,
In the fork of your legs ,
Until the moment when you become that which you ultimately feared...
One of them.

I am from the Pool where my grandpa's favor gave me the chance to learn, to swim, and to breath.
I am from that walk on the shores of my birth, where the Geese lined up in flocks to usher in a greeting to their new king.

I am from her arms.
Where finally she says:
'You are enough'
'You. Are. Enough.'


This is me

I am from that little seed of doubt,
Forever ingrained upon my mind,
Picked at like the pieces of bread on the sidewalk,
I am from hesitation, and fear.
I am from walking forward.

I am from tomorrow,
And today.
I am from my mother, who never had the time.
I am from my father, who was no where to be found.

I am from being lost,
In the store and fearing that I had not only lost myself,
But lost the only way back home that I knew.

I am from being scooped up by my grandfather, and my grandmother.
I am from the mirror that would show the tears streaking down my face.
I am from the finger that would point at me and say:
'This is you.
Don't ever be afraid.
Don't ever be ashamed.'

This is me.
Mar 2014 · 12.9k
I want to be wanted.
Andrew Fisher Mar 2014
I want to be wanted.
I want to be worth wanting.
To be desired, sought after, prized.
I want to be protected.
Not shielded, but jealously kept.
Not abused either... Just held.

I want someone to love me.
Feb 2014 · 1.3k
Tears
Andrew Fisher Feb 2014
Sometimes I cry myself to sleep.
Tears of Blood,
Clear, and white,
Normal tears, but
I know they
are Blood.
I literally found this written in my journal. It is not my original make, but I feel it deserves to be seen for some odd reason.
Feb 2014 · 597
Amnesia
Andrew Fisher Feb 2014
Black.
Forgotten.
Something that was never missed.
I'm left trembling,
Begging to let it go again.

I am Lost in the sea of my own consciousness,
Without an Ark or raft to save me from the Flood.
I drift.
I drown.
I am Lost.

Left, retreating after countless defeats in battle,
My forces begin to whisper the seeds of doubt.
How can this conflict be justified?
All the innocence lost in the blaze.

For, while I no longer can fear death,
The answer to that question stares me down,
Like a wolf... eyeing a rabbit.

...still... I fight on.
...Still I will Win.
If for nothing else to drag the innocence out,
Of the crossfire that rages in my mind...

And through the haze, and the smoke, and the flames...
There sits a boy.
Lost.
Forgotten.
Black.
Jan 2014 · 576
This is where I Stand
Andrew Fisher Jan 2014
This is where I shall stand.
Against life's currents.
Where I can dig my toes in the sand.

***** the walls of my castle.
The seat of power for this land.
Though the resistance might hassle.
I will stand tall.
It is not by birth.
But by right, that I should rule them all.

Crimes they may cry.
Crimes against us all!
Yet even though they still call for my fall.
My trial... Is one that is indeed open to all.

Mistakes and my blunders a plenty.
Secrets and regrets to many.
I am not without remorse.
I am not above my own law,
I made it after all.

But here I shall stand against the thrall
To reclaim my throne.
To bring peace to us all.
I know not what will come.
Or what people will think.

But I know this one fact...
I will try to be the best King.
The best that I can be.
Jan 2014 · 849
This is me
Andrew Fisher Jan 2014
This is me

I am from the wet and sticky.
I was born in the water, yet, somehow I ended up in the mud.

I am from the hopeful cooing's of my sisters,
From the moment when they had held me up,
They said 'you will be king'
They must have forgotten about the Fan...
As I raised my hands towards that light,
The sounds I heard in my head became the steady and rapid chop of the blades of disappointment and failure breaking upon my skin

I am from the school of Hard Knocks,
The place where you were kicked down,
In the fork of your legs ,
Until the moment when you become that which you ultimately feared...
One of them.

I am from the Pool where my grandpa's favor gave me the chance to learn, to swim, and to breath.
While my father's fear condemned me to sink.
I am from that walk on the shores of my birth, where the Geese lined up in flocks to usher in a greeting to their new king.

I am from her arms.
Where finally she says:
'You are enough'
'You. Are. Enough.'

I am from that little seed of doubt,
Forever ingrained upon my mind,
Picked at like the pieces of bread on the sidewalk,
I am from hesitation, and fear.
I am from walking forward.

I am from tomorrow,
And today.
I am from my mother, who never had the time.
I am from my father, who was no where to be found.

I am from being lost,
In the store and fearing that I had not only lost myself,
But lost the only way back home that I knew.

I am from being scooped up by my grandfather,
I am from the mirror they would point as the tears streaked down my face.
I am from the finger they would point at me and say:
'This is you.
Don't ever be afraid.
Don't ever be ashamed.'

This is me.
Edited, It felt unfinished before, I hope you guys like the new version.
Jan 2014 · 860
Cheese
Andrew Fisher Jan 2014
As infrequent as a night alone.
As subtle as a touch on the shoulder.
Love stands above all else as the goal of our lives.
To Love...
I know... that's cheese.
Yet, that seems like a consequential goal of life too.
Doesn't it?
We spend our lives in pursuit of love, and what do we come up with?
A boat load of cheese.
Not that cheese is a particularly bad thing,
Sure sometimes its smelly, or doesn't taste very pleasant,
Its funny how those cheeses are usually the ones most sought after,
Still, everyone has their preference as to which cheese was the best.
The most well-made, the tastiest.
No two cheeses are ever the same.
As is with love.
Some people wish to gather as much cheese as they can, becoming collectors,
Others are allergic,
some are even Turophobic.

But in the end...
What really matters?
The cheesiness of a pizza?
Or the mere fact that you ate it?
I wrote this as a joke and pun on my "cheesy" one-liners
Jan 2014 · 537
I may be Dead Inside
Andrew Fisher Jan 2014
I may be dead inside,
I may be rotting,
But Ill keep walking,
until I find you again
Jan 2014 · 716
The Journey
Andrew Fisher Jan 2014
The Journey I take is an Arduous one.
Redemption.
And only by the toil of my Blood, Sweat, and Tears shall I be granted it.
I have Cried.
I have Sweat.
Now I must Bleed.

The Road I travel is a Forlorn one.
Forgiveness.
And only by the mercy of my opponent shall I be granted it.
I have Given to Others.
I have Payed for my Sins.
Now I must Give it to Myself.

The Path I walk is a Lost one.
Peace.
And only by the grace of death shall I, Perhaps, receive it.
I have Lived.
I have Lost.
Now I must Sleep.
Jan 2014 · 592
I am Sorry for being Sorry.
Andrew Fisher Jan 2014
I'm sorry for being sorry...
I wish there was another way,
to show you of my penance,
and that I've really changed my ways.
I'm sorry for the pain,
All the guilt and the sorrow,
It's not your fault but mine.
As is all the Hell that would follow.
I was to sick to see,
I was lost and adrift in this sea.
I am sorry for the very first breath I gave,
But here I shall lay despite all this,
Never next to anyone.
I am sorry.
Jan 2014 · 1.0k
How I Know.
Andrew Fisher Jan 2014
You know how I know love is real?
I know love exists because, like love, you’re beautiful
You laugh, but it's true
Beauty is something both rare and astounding
Magnificent and special,
It is a moment in nature that is both rare and sudden,
Where you want to cry, not because you want to hold onto it forever, but because you know it is beautiful; and you feel peace and calm just from having enjoyed the few seconds of it.
I know love exists because, like love, you hurt.
Pain is the proof of life, but some tend bear more than others
Everyone has pain, but a feeling exists that allows others to have strength in taking on others' pain, So as to keep others safe and comfortable,
And nowhere is that more evident than in you.
I know love exists because, like love, your patient
Like a mother waiting for her child to stop crying, you wait, tenderly, supportively, yet passively, allowing space for healing and forgiveness that comes from this care
I know Love exist because, like love, your gone:
Love is internal in the moment,
But that moment will soon pass,
Only to be replaced by another and yet still another after that
So. I know love exists... Because you exist
And it would be a pity if you only existed for me in my mind
So you exist for the world, and that is why I know love exists
Because your touch is felt in the world
And your attention is given to the world
I would say I am jealous of the world…
Kind of a statement to my love life, and simultaneously the loves of my life.
Jan 2014 · 627
The Black Pool
Andrew Fisher Jan 2014
Looking up into the black pool,
I am filled with wonder,
Where only a few have swam before.
Its a curious thing to expect to get wet,
From walking among the sun and the moon.
From swimming among the stars of the earth,
Ones that hold no ambition or desire,

I wonder if I swim alone, in a lonely black pool of thought,
or are there others up here with me.
Waiting to Splash me with their ideas,
Or bless me with their wisdom.

Or maybe there is a sea serpent,
waiting at the bottom of the black pool,
Would it lash out at me?
And constrict around me like the boundaries and limitations of the shore?
Or would it embrace me?
And free me from the limitations and boundaries of my mind.

— The End —