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Amanda Kay Burke Dec 2021
I hate being depressed all the time
Only have myself to blame
Repeating mistakes over and over
They always end the same
Depressed life heartbroken sad repeating over mistakes
Amanda Kay Burke Dec 2021
I know it's dumb but I truly believe
Even after all this time I'm still still so naive
To think we were destined to be together
Yet hope lingers on the word "forever"
You see in my eyes you're always the one
Even after you informed me your attraction  was done
So you can tell me you no longer feel the same way
But the stubborn love in my heart is here to stay
I try to move on and find someone new
But for some reason can't get over you
I will never stop cherishing the memories shared
I lie to myself and pretend that you cared
I'm not sure what created the chasm between
I guess in reality you weren't as happy as you made it seem
I was deluded by fear and desperation
Blind to your dwindling captivation
Part of me wishes that you would miss us like me
Because deep down I know we were meant to be
Amanda Kay Burke Dec 2021
I didn't want to give up on us
Thought I would stick with you through the worst
So you can fault me if you want
But you gave up on yourself first
Amanda Kay Burke Dec 2021
It's the continuous silent yet pressing "tick-tock"
In my head heard though I own no clock
It's opening eyes every morning to familiar pain
And constant weight of loneliness driving me insane
Sorry I haven't been posting lately
Amanda Kay Burke Nov 2021
I miss sunny weather
The earth is full of snow
Seeking shelter somewhere warm
Lately cold is all I know
Amanda Kay Burke Nov 2021
If you remove darkness inside me how much matter would remain?
Would it be a clean break or would that shadow leave a stain?
The antiques passed through generations only weigh me down
Heirloom weakness and shame parents wore as crowns
Would bring all the way till I crossed the finish line
Their weight is making progress steadily decline
Yet when I try releasing find their grip is way too strong
Have no other choice but drag these heavy burdens along
I fear limbs decay the more time that passes by
Friction wearing holes in flesh
I can't sever ties
A broken soiled reputation all I've seemed to gain
Blessings one by one like drops of water swirled the drain
Under layers of appearance is a piece of myself I rightly hate
Seems to be too large to safely amputate
These cheap thrills have gotten more expensive than platinum and gold
Their toll taken by draining my peace and prematurely making me old
As I held dreams in hand I stumbled and I fell
Shattered as they hit the floor
Hopes more fragile than eggshells
Then clumsy feet only made the mess worse
Every step makes a crunching noise
Wish I could somehow reverse
I never knew growing up would cause me to feel so low
Only when flying too high that I see how far the pavement waits below
The little girl in me died now there's a stranger in her place
Look in mirror and am terrified because the stranger wears my face
Feeling some feels right now
Amanda Kay Burke Nov 2021
I try to view as just a bump in the road
Wish silently the right way to be shown
I've been walking this path for so many years
Other directions seem to disappear
I sit and wait for opportunity's knock
It doesn't
Continue to walk..
Against wall my back is pressed
Is this destiny or simply a test?
I should be alarmed
The darkness closing in
It's nothing compared to the blackness within
What lies before us and what lies behind us are tin matters compared to what lies within us
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