No matter what life throws you,
be the one at bat to swing with confidence
knowing you can hit a home run because
you have a record of a grand slammer
who is of a divine soul.

I ask for rain to come
and hide my tears.
To cleanse my heart that feels a loss.

I ask for rain in hopes to swim away
and float to an island far I say.
A place where animals gather
to celebrate the dawn.

Where time stops and fireflies dance in beauty.
Where I transform into my true nature.
The one with expansive wings and a forever smile.

I ask for rain to come
and tickle senses
to help me rise forgetting dark.
To let me be a child again,
Intoxicated by gentle breeze
and graceful waves.

A land where miracles grow like flowers
and heart can be rejuvenated to welcome self love.

I ask as rain falls,
washing me clean so no tears will come.
Cleansing as vault of dreams opens
in merry go round of rainbow light
Light on an island of love.

I was 16. You were 18.
I was on top. You were on bottom.
The kind of love that is unbreakable.
Skipping school to nap and eat late breakfast.
Kissing by the railroad tracks.
You were the only one who really loved my short hair.
Watching you put on your skinny jeans became my new obsession.
Always grabbing the small of my back while kissing me.

We fought as hard as we loved.
Manipulative arguments with hurtful undertones.
Breaking photo frames just to keep me near.
Running down the stairs, grabbing my wrists.
I fell against the wall as you pushed yourself on me.
Here we go, falling again.
I was too young to be dealing with this adult criteria.

That day, I went to your bathroom.
I came out as you sat on the edge of your bed.
My palms sweating, in my hand, a pregnancy test.
I began to cry.
I couldn't be a mother-I couldn't even care for myself.
He looked at me and grabbed my waist.
"You being pregnant wouldn't be the worst thing..."
I started falling for him yet again.
"You'd be a great mom, Ash."

Beep. Beep.

Negative.