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Old man, you surface seldom.
Then you come in with the tide's coming
When seas wash cold, foam-

Capped: white hair, white beard, far-flung,
A dragnet, rising, falling, as waves
Crest and trough. Miles long

Extend the radial sheaves
Of your spread hair, in which wrinkling skeins
Knotted, caught, survives

The old myth of orgins
Unimaginable. You float near
As kneeled ice-mountains

Of the north, to be steered clear
Of, not fathomed. All obscurity
Starts with a danger:

Your dangers are many. I
Cannot look much but your form suffers
Some strange injury

And seems to die: so vapors
Ravel to clearness on the dawn sea.
The muddy rumors

Of your burial move me
To half-believe: your reappearance
Proves rumors shallow,

For the archaic trenched lines
Of your grained face shed time in runnels:
Ages beat like rains

On the unbeaten channels
Of the ocean. Such sage humor and
Durance are whirlpools

To make away with the ground-
Work of the earth and the sky's ridgepole.
Waist down, you may wind

One labyrinthine tangle
To root deep among knuckles, shinbones,
Skulls. Inscrutable,

Below shoulders not once
Seen by any man who kept his head,
You defy questions;

You defy godhood.
I walk dry on your kingdom's border
Exiled to no good.

Your shelled bed I remember.
Father, this thick air is murderous.
I would breathe water.
Legs on show down an aisle of fridges and freezers
and I am taken in by the red of your top.
A swift sight of a face, nothing much,
father nearby I presume, a brother too
but minutes later gone.
As the evening is reeled in,
I see the same flash dash into the palace
before I am certain it’s you once more.
I didn’t see you or the shorts again
but plenty of others were decked out in denim,
all aliens beneath the neon lights.
Written: July and August 2012.
Explanation: My first poem after returning from my holiday, this piece is about a girl I saw (twice in the same day) wearing denim shorts. She was not the only one wearing a pair. A rough draft of this poem was made in my notebook before being uploaded onto here, as well as being uploaded as a Facebook status update (in similar vein to several of my previous poems) in my short series of unrelated short poems.
The Eclipse

The eclipse dose not become endless night
The reappearance of light is the same as the survival of soul
The eclipse
Such indeed a character of the historic hour through which the world was passing
Objects close to the eye shut out much larger objects on the horizon
A quiet  and unexpected  change,
That looked  the desultory range
Of happiness  and sprightly thought.
Where'er was dipped the toiling
oar,
The direction of winds  danced round us as
before,
As lightly, though of altered hue;
Mid recent coolness, such as falls
At noon-tide from umbrageous
walls
That screen the morning dew.
No vapour stretched its wings; no
cloud
Cast far or near a murky shroud;
The sky an azure field displayed;
'There was light  sheathed and gently
charmed,
Of all its sparkling rays disarmed,
And as in slumber laid:--
Or something night and day
between,
Like moon shine--but the hue was
green;
Still moon shine, without shadow,
spread
On jutting rock, and curved shore
There was one.
A young man,
Smart, confident, eloquent.
Lost.
Popular, the leader of the pack
Yet courage doesn't always roar, and neither did he
Strong whispers echo with thunderous force
He is the humble king;
What he says goes.
But he did not mean it this way,
Did not ask.
Such responsibility is a heavy handed task.
He wanders amongst his squires and compatriots
The omniscient light in a realm of darkness,
Bringer of love, and peace and hope.
But inside of him these emotions have been abducted
By the predatory tenebrosity of his own mind.
An everlasting, ****** battle takes place
But who is to be deemed victor if he is fighting himself?

There was another
A young lady.
Smart, confident, eloquent.
Withdrawn.
Her desperate need to please others saw her relegated to the outskirts of society
Clingy and desperate, when it suited them,
Helpful and irreplaceable another day.
Until she'd had enough
And cast herself away in exile,
From anyone and everyone.
She sought to make herself invisible,
After all, you cannot plunge a sword into the heart of one you cannot see.
This she knew was her blessing and her curse
Her savior and her foe
And just like that she was back to square one
The girl they had pushed and pulled,
Until she was permanently subdued,
A mere ghost of the exuberant being she was before


Then one day
The wandering souls fused in spectacular fashion
His bright beam illuminating the corners to which she had receded
A meeting on extempore, of broken hearts, broken minds.
They looked deep into each others minds,
Their internal recesses open
Showing a continuous film of horrific abuse
Damaged products drawn together
And then

There were two.
A young man and woman,
Whose lives became intertwined like weeds in flower beds
Twisting and wrapping, suffocating and strangling
Choking with a vice like grip
Unable to breathe, having to fill each others lungs
Company was no longer a want, but a need
If they were to survive, it would be together.
This mangled and gnarled love was anything but smooth sailing
But it was worth the struggles and continuous setbacks for those few moments of bliss.
Moments when responsibilities and pain and direction were forgotten
Where being lost was okay, because neither of them knew were they were going
The pain would subside, the revolting stench disguised by the scent of love.
And happiness and hope were tangible.

Still there were two
Yet she knew not what to do
Thoughts raced through her mind in befuddling fashion
Like a horse who hears a gunshot
She panicked.
The distance, her safety blanket was long gone
But she had only just realised her guard was down
White flag waved
That her path took her into the firing range
Where he was behind the gun.
A vow came to mind
A self-promise that she would never hurt again
And if she were,
It would be by noone but her
So
She ran, knowing it would crush the life out of him
A mother leaving her child in the wicker basket
A father saying he would be right back,
And never returning.
She was all these things and more;
Thief or plunderer would be an accurate description.

And then there was
Well, there was not much
For when she left, she took most of him with her
His shell remained seated, waiting patiently for her return
Even after day three thousand, when he had become a brobdignagian mass of dirt, grime and hope.
That's all he had left; hope.
For nothing else but her reappearance.
Life; he had given up long ago.
But he never gave up on their reunion;
on the opportunity, if only briefly to return to the bliss, the joy,
The exhilaration of his eyes locked onto hers,
Both so broken they could only maintain for a few moments.
He never gave up
Until he too, was gone.

And then there were none.
I don't know how
To get her home,
Or if she has one...
Does 𝘴𝘩𝘦 even know?

If I reached out my hand,
Would she even pull?

She's been making herself larger.
I can feel her reappearance.
She gets brighter, I get darker.
Interfering with my impulse,
And it happened again...

I forgot how I got here,
Don't where I began.

▪︎ mica light ▪︎
From over the bridge
the sky curved into the river
and the winds from the distant hills
carved a smile on his face.

So here he was, at last, all by himself
played upon by a feeling
of being not shadowed anymore
but by the one his very own.

light as the bird, came to his mind,
and making sure no one was around,
he spoke aloud
I'm light as the bird.

Yet a shadow was preying upon him,
an unease, a discomfort, a disequilibrium,
as he heard within, his son saying,

Baba, you need to take a break,
to be with yourself, to be away from us,
to soothe the frayed nerves..


So I have been set free, he thought,
but are the birds really as free
as they appear to be?

So here he was, but his mind was drifting,
and he was calculating like a child.

how many feet below is the river,
would the fall hurt, or would one have to wait,
for the impact with the rushing surface
before the final touch by the boulders?


I shouldn't be perilously close, he stepped back,
muttering three incoherent words..
components of love.

Back to the Rest House,
he was packing his bag.

He was not sure, if his reappearance,
at so short a notice,
would at all be, a pleasant surprise.
Sarah Mann May 2018
I want to be in a love like this forever.
With your eyes grazing my skin,
Following your circling fingertips.
You touch me in a way, so delicately,
So lovingly, like you actually care.
Your kisses that you place on my forehead
As I’m drifting off into paradise
Remind me what spring love is supposed to look like.
The grass under my toes pull me into the present
While we dance across the lawn with our hands intertwined.
Butterflies zig zag across my vision and you spin me around.
The music drowns out all of our other problems.
And life feels beautiful.
When I’m in my sundress and
You’re watching me from our picnic blanket
You tell me you love me, and my heart begins to flutter.
The last days of cold are erased by your beautiful laugh
The warmth of sunlight and the soft cool breeze
Further pushes our passion and solidifies our feelings.
You grip my waist and lift me into the air.
Time feels rosy and fair, while the birds chirp and call.
With no real agenda, without the controlling menace of time.
We hold hands and spend the afternoons enjoying the bliss.
The newly bloomed flowers and reappearance of green
Feels like a long awaited, highly anticipated surprise
As does our relationship.
We take in the pink skies together,
Hoping we will never have to say goodbye,
Affectionately kissing one another.
Knowing this is a time we will always miss.
Spring, is a time for new beginnings.
It is the perfect time, for a love like this.
Written over spring break during a time when my life was a little more filled with light.
Sea Mar 2014
ink fades; paper grows yellow
around the edges of the letters you wrote.
I reread them and think of you;
and suddenly you reappear
claire Apr 2015
there’s a soft blossoming
at the core of us;
neighbor children have
begun making their chalky universes
on asphalt again
loud laughter rings along these
muted suburban streets
seeds tremble into bloom
the reappearance of sunbeams and bird flocks
and other splendid details
we’d forgotten during the cold
delights us

now is the time to step out
of our old skins
and waste breath on dandelion wishes
now is the time for these
chrysalis hearts to break open
and ascend
unbound at last
If Wishes Had Wings, I’d be idolized by millions
saving & impacting the lives of many scarred children
If Wishes Had Wings, the world would be free from pain
no more dark clouds surrounded by depressing rains
If Wishes Had Wings, the silent tears would be clearly heard
life would be less horrific so we’d worry less of the overwhelming storms
If Wishes Had Wings, the act of happiness shall be of reappearance
provide my mental slaves with the proper deliverance
If Wishes Had Wings, Love wouldn’t be so scary to obtain
heart break would be a stranger while the kingdom we have will still reign
If Wishes Had Wings, there would no longer be Hell on Earth
take away all the evil from life to grant us the proper rebirth
If Wishes Had Wings, heartbreaks around the world would sing
the greatest melody performed by all the broken Kings & Queens
If Wishes Had Wings, God forgive us for the lives we’ve been sinning in
trapped in a cold evil world that we’re forced but isolatedly living in
never intending to be heartless but our hearts have turned cold
frustratedly feeling the shattering of love to which a false interest beholds
possessing a tale that’s very relating but only a few understand
how being lonely & disappointed can take a toll on more than man

☆ Poetic Venxm ☆
Lauren Nov 2013
It follows you
It seems almost impossible to break free
From its cruel, hateful grasp
You think you've escaped it
But again it captures you
More tight and securely than before
Once again you are trapped
In the hands of a monster

You paint lines on your arms
In a wonderful shade of red
To prove to yourself and those around you
Your pain is as real as any other emotion
Any other feeling
Its alive, more alive than you have been for a long time
And you can feel something once again
The pleasurable sting of the crimson sea
Making its way to shore
On your virginal white skin
Now stained with scarlet puddles

Or the food you made such an effort to consume
When it makes a reappearance
Its swimming inside the lavatory
You are no longer just empty in your soul
But also in your stomach, a body part you despise,
with such a burning passion.

You may poison yourself in many other ways,
in attempt to slay this beast
Like a medication, to ease the pain and discomfort
Pills and liquor, *** and love making
Also take the edge off for a little while
And a little while is a whole lot better than nothing at all
But its not enough
Its still got you
Mateuš Conrad May 2016
i've actually reached a zenith of my use of language, the overstated early use of humour... paradoxically it's also a nadir of language, foremost i blame it on psychological emphasis of certain words without clear grammatical patterns of casual interference / usage, which stemmed from philosophy's avoidance of grammatical words as useful short cuts... and poetic laconic shoving near millimetre associations kindred of the synonymous categorical: dog, cat, tree, fig, apple... nouns. i have a reached a limit having attempted to create a geometry with a- (indefinite / without "articulation" / existence / or simply pluralism) and the (definite articulation / existence / or simply monotheism, index finger pointing), and the prefix in-, ascribed to an illogical categorisation of infinity and infinitude as inclusive nouns... where the former attracts the indefinite article, and the later attracts the definite article, most commonly example with stars, space, time and insects, but not man: e.g. ever hear of a famous bee named Newton? no, me neither. i just noticed that poetry over-philosophised itself by using grammatical terms in that near-synonymousness of d'uh and that philosophy avoided using these grammatical terms of categorisation, fearing a demented disintegration of casual speech, as near to quantum physics as language of humanities could be approached with: the disappearing act of hope (noun, +) and reappearance of it as hopelessness (adjective, although still ~noun, therefore still +), meaning being hopeless (verb, although ~adjective, and now attached to dark matter - / negative): hence the many sensitivities over crude vocabulary, hence the kept church Latin and the lost humour of ****** Latin.*

e.g.

newspapers are depressing, i know, on pages 34 & 35
there's a picture of an orang utan posing in an
auguste rodin pose of the thinker: eyes close together never
ageing of a Down Syndrome Dorian Grey,
hairstyle of an Elton John, though: headlines surroudning
the picture read things stuff that horror movies are
not intelligent to reveal, i.e. mob rule; horror movies treat
the individual as the ultimate menace, they never care
to make cinematic eloquences with individual's
shadow, of those around him: Jesus herding his sheep
who's prime expression is ****** white hands drenched
in blood unable to doubt, therefore only able to deny,
and what a poverty of lying ingenuity
denial is... one man tennis hitting a brick wall...
people reserve more doubt at having hit a tennis ball
against a wall than  denying it... doubt is a
dual-carriageway... so much self in doubt among
others than there is self-consciousness in denial
among others... denial is a cul de sac alley...
the mirror wished to remain hidden for fear
of realisation... denial is a faking of innocence /
         doubt is a faking of knowledge -
childish-like later: oh! misinformation corrected!
like electrons not having orbits but existing in
quantum clouds! former high-school teaching,
later university teaching! born 1952, died 1989:
now you see me, now you don't, electron-quick
hands of magicians. but... but... but
you can't deny both infinitudes (limits)
of your unitary vector (ego)...
sure you can deny the infinitude (algebraic
pinpoint 1) and deny the finitude (algebraic
pinpoint 2), but you can't deny two infinitudes,
i.e. you're either god or nothing...
as you can't deny two finitudes,
i.e. you're either memorable or worth forgetting;
nor can you deny an infinitude and doubt
the finitude - although you deny the finitude
with a chance excavation of infinitude as an
example o... Finnegans Wake does that to you...
hence the common stance is denying;
imagine the Cartesian equation plagued by denial,
i deny, therefore i'm not...
my writing will not reach popular appeal because
it wishes to not disturb, not not uproot a perfectly
happy man from a simple method he can perfect
and challenge genius over a complex method
which it can only imperfect.
i'm not going to forgive the nature of my 26 surds
kept in the optic with the double-surd of H in language
spoken, but your critique of my cognitive use of language,
which is purely optic and not in the least care phonetic
belongs to me, i know my conversational language
where i disengage from having to engage with all
the pronouns, as existentialism proved itself pedantic to
be defining itself by, using all pronouns to "ditto" out
the one single pronoun, simply the ego, and therefore
to produce f(denial) = "ego"; f(x)
  h
     x
        h
                             function of two truths
                             f(x) = "ego" or Freudian theory
                                        of blame it on the superego
                                        or blame it on the id...
what, matchsticks not good enough for your arabic
complications?! you got oil, i have wood,
stop coming to europe for the summer to burn
rather than spend your precious oil! FRY *******!
FRY LIKE AN AUSTRALIAN BARBECUE DERBY
OF BARBIE STUCK IN A BURQA!
Zoe Jul 2011
waking up in the hospital
with an IV in one arm,
and the reappearance of
a sad long island
iced tea
dripping down the other,
with an eight hundred dollar
bill to pay
from a hundred dollar a week
pay check–
and you realize
you are not
where you thought
you'd be.
I might regret posting this. Enjoy it while it's still up.
Summer Novak Jul 2012
The ship rocked and swayed back and forth in the calm blue waters.

Despite the subtle breeze and beautiful view,
Jonah couldn’t help but crouch down and hang his head between his legs
in an attempt to shake the sickening feeling he was experiencing.

How do they cope? Jonah thought,
envying the crew, who didn’t seem to be phased by the never ending tilts
or reek of dead fish surrounding them.

His jealous day dream was suddenly cut off as his miserable breakfast from earlier
made a reappearance over the edge of the ship.
Elise Mar 2014
When I concentrate
the ache goes away
and I am beautiful
with my ribs hiding
under this flesh
the extra body heat
that is so unnecessary
and I know the mirror
tells me lies and its
my brain that tells
me otherwise but the
act of resistance is
an addiction;
to deprive myself
is an obsession I
can't break I can't  
heal it's a disease its
a paradox, like me,
nonsensical, there is
no substance to it
only absence, no
release, there is no
relief.  The  voices in
my head are screaming
at me to not give up
to stay away to keep
my distance.  The more
I resist, the more
beautiful I become.
Does it tire me out?
Does it keep me alive?
I persuade myself to
believe that I will not
lose myself resisting
but then I am empty
and I feel the dark
engulf my soul that
fades away and my
mind begins to fight
with me, myself, and I
and then I realize that
I love the way I hate
myself not that I am
loving myself because
I have lost myself
I lost my way and
before I heal the fear
creeps in and hysteria
takes its toll and there
is pain everywhere and
I become completely
dark so that the light
can sneak back in and
light up my sky once again.
But I know the ache
always makes a reappearance..
Destiny Hendrick Aug 2013
There is something peaceful about being alone
Allowed to sit with nothing but your own thoughts
Doing nothing only taking a moment to relax
Close your eyes take a deep breath
Let your mind wander to infinity
Relive good memories
Bit your lip as the bad make their reappearance
Contemplate the reason for making particular decisions
Imagine
Do not be bothered by anyone else making noise
Blah blah blah
Going on and on and on
About things you have no interest in
And go off to be alone
And find peace in the nothingness
That's all your own
RisingUp Feb 2016
She helped me when I was entangled in the thorns of the dreaded disease,

But it has come back to take away her peace.

I stare at each picture, bathing suit clad,
And see nothing but the evil monster, grinning and mad.

Because when I look at those photos I see nothing but the disorder

The internal torment, anguish, self-battering thoughts
That cause your self confidence and self worth to rot

That ***** and **** at each slight imperfection
That promise to point you in the proper direction

That monster, so sly, so cunning, so persuasive
But also terribly, horribly invasive

For if you let your guard down after the first fight
It will come back to prove its might

This monster can’t be killed from a therapy session
This form of attack only diminishes its aggression

But the monster lays waiting in the dark
And takes advantage of any self deprecating spark
Until it can attack like a mighty white shark.

This monster tries to take the lives of many.

Including my own.

But I will not let it destroy the friends close to my heart
The monster’s reappearance signals me to do my part

To slay the beast, relentlessly work till it’s dead
Otherwise all it takes is a self critical thought to be fed

A comparison, picture, reminder of its deceiving phrases
Fighting this monster is the only way to cure the hazes
Jamie F Nugent Jun 2016
Scott Greene was a man of vast wealth, and also of vast anger and sadness. His wealth he inherited from his late father, or rather, the company that his founded, a leading manufacturer of contact lenses. His anger and sadness he inherited from his wife, Mary, or rather, an argument that they had. Mary had found a brazer not belong to her, all black-laced and in measurements suited for a slimmer, not doubt, younger woman. In the past several weeks leading up to the find, Mary had a great suspension of Scott's jilted ways, and now after cleaning under the bed, Mary had finally found tangible proof of her husband's paramour. The fight ensued the movement Scott came from his daily grind. With a livid Mary holding up Scott's lover's garment in a fist clenched so tightly it turned reddish and throbbed. The underwear was displayed like evidence like a courtroom. How Scott wished for a lawyeresque individual who would lie for him and talk his way of all this. But, alas, feeling unlucky and alone, like a Magpie, Scott just wanted to fly away from all of this, or swim, or dig and crawl away through the dirt. Scott just stood there in the high-ceilinged mansion hallway as Mary, his once lover, screamed awful and ugly things at him. Scott had stopped listening, instead wondering how long she could keep up screaming until she felt that red piercing pain in her throat and could not stand to scream any longer. However curious, Scott was adamant to find out, instead opting to leave and go anywhere that wasn't where he was right then.

Scott yelled, depressed by his own voice, that he was going for a drive. Coldly, Mary called him spineless, the worst thing she could think of. She waited for Scott to leave, then started to cry alone in the near-empty house. Scott, still dress in fine gray suit from work, walked briskly past his horses in the stable to his garage, and into his favorite car, the Rolls Royce, Phantom. Nothing but the finest. Scott turned the ignition on and turned the radio up to try and clear his aching head.

Scott drove to an all-night diner just out of the town. After what seemed like mere seconds, Scott was there. As he opened the diner door, a bell chimed. Looking around with that eyes that darted around the room left-to-right as if watching a tennis game, Scott found that his only company was the staff and a few large truck drivers who stared and made Scott feel out of place. He sat away from them, at the other end of the place. A young, dark-haired waitress came to take his order. "What'll be, sweetie?" she queried, "Coffee, black" Scott answered, looking her in the eyes. He thought her eyes very pretty, yet having a little gloom in them too. Scott got a quick look at the name-tag draped on her breast before she walked away; It read Jane. Scott watched her walk away, her slender splendor and eyeing her legs and lower thighs poking out of her seductively short work skirt. Scott flirted with the notions of flirting with her. After all, what was left to lose?

He thought to himself. But after opening his wallet to pay for the coffee, the little photo-both snapshot of Mary he kept inside his wallet make him think twice. On the reappearance of the radiant waitress, she asked Scott if that would be all he wanted. "Yeah, I'm good for everything else" Scott said. As the waitress walked away, Scott stared at the spoon on his saucer. Its contoured reflection showed his face silvery, upside-down and all stretched out and bent. Scott then looked at the design on the wall next to him. The pattern was of hula dancing girls playing red ukuleles. Scott's mind rushed back to his and Mary's Hawaiian honeymoon, years ago. How the honeymoon was truly over. Scott began to drink his coffee, it was pleasant. Scott picked up a salt shaker from the tabletop. He swerved it in his hand and looked at the salt inside, overlapping on top of itself. Suddenly, Scott felt so small and valueless, and that he belonged inside the shaker, buried underneath the salt, away from everything, he thought is surely easier than everything. Scott finished his cup and thought it time to return home.

Scott excited the tragic diner, got into his car, and drove home. While driving through the driveway, he noticed the bedroom lights still on. He thought Mary must only be going to bed just now. Scott would wait a few moments before entering and then go to sleep in the guest bedroom. Mary was a heavy sleeper. In the meantime, Scott parked the car and then walked to the stables to visit his favorite horse, April, who a colossal Clydesdale with a glossy brown coat with a snow-white mane. Scott went into the stall, he slowly began to brush her mane. He knew there was no point in talking to her, but did so, just feeling good getting the words out. Scott told the great animal his worries, fears, and hopes. After a while, Scott started to feel his eyes heavy, and thoughts of going to bed seemed satisfying. In a sleepy stumble, he reached out and suddenly touched the horse, saying fondly "Goodnight, April". Then everything went to black. Early the next morning, Mary found Scott on the stable floor, his skull in several pieces from April's startled kick.

She wept.
Jayanta Jun 2014
Probably lost all faith,
Unable to speak, share, splodge,
Nothing is there,
Wipe-out everything,
By the gush of water,
Waiting only for reappearance
from sunken mud !
wipe-out,sunken,mud, water, faith,
Onoma Sep 2020
This is enough,

because it is finished.

there is a master for

every hand, rubbing

the belief of every eye.

It Is enough.

The One to convince

is prone to disappear,

while winking with

reappearance.
Jeffrey Oliviero Jan 2016
A mysterious reappearance on Facebook
has had me recently racing
In a jealous craze, Investigating
My replacement aka
This clown you're dating
I'll man up and admit it
You may have upgraded
Really hate to say it
but he seems amazing
Miserably considering goodbyes
blowing kisses and waving
We've lost our gravitation
You took off on a spaceship
I was too patient and complacent
Questioning every second I waited
Now it's inevitable
The effects left from depression
Can only be fixed with a facelift
Sanni Olalekan Jan 2014
Ayomi you've axed my heart,
It bleeds as sea,
No point of start,
The heart of me,

His walls are smashed,
Roofs suddenly rust,
Our love bashed,
You let loose the trust,

The one I strongly fethered,
My wings you've also clipped,
Now only you can bring him fethered,
Hasten as the time ticks right,
So your reappearance kills not the heart with fright!
KrystalTears Jan 2014
My curiosity left me to searching you.
As I form your name,
I know exactly who,
It's time to start this game.

I enhance my appearance,
In a way you couldn't shake,
I'm making my reappearance,
It's time I reawake.

I knew I said I'd forget you,
I've convinced myself so much.
Even though I know I do,
I can't do as such.

There is something you have,
That grasps onto my heart.
It's like being cut in halves,
When we try to act apart.

Days ago, you accepted my request.
A memory I collect,
and send it to you in protest.
In hope you will reflect.

This morning I check up,
On this chest game I've made.
You replied a video saying " Sup!"
I'm surprised only a little delay.

My heart stops,
Your faint smile.
My bliss tops,
I ran that mile.

I have you once more,
I'm not letting you slip away.
I'm mending what' we tore,
By simple words we'll say.

I reply back,
My cheeks rosy red.
My confidence lack,
To those words you said.

Now I'm in my daily routine,
I see that you've receive,
I know that you've seen.
You smiled like I did,
That's what I believe.
~
Emily Williams Mar 2016
I dial your number and pause
In the moment before the moment.

Hello?

In an instant, you are not just a memory, a regret, a thousand miles a way
You are with me in the car, parked in a lot.
The spotlight hits me and I turn on.

Hello!
(as if I’m surprised to hear voice)
How are you?
(like I really care)
Guess what!
(as if my brief reappearance in your life is the best news you’ve ever heard)

Rain spits on my windshield as I laugh with you
A suave performance to meant to pass as reality.
I savor the sound of your voice
Caught off guard
And cringe at the pauses
The stiff formalities and cold distance.

I dance in circles on the phone
An artificial, plastic caricature
Synthetic nonchalance tightly orchestrated
Still contorting myself to impress you.
At the most I'll be his sidekick for a few semesters,
crunching leaves as I walk back to his apartment, where I'll take a nap while he studies ancient philosophies, waiting for his reappearance. We'll get ****** and bicker over where to go for lunch, even though we know it'll end up being sushi (it always is).

At the least I'll be the girl he's talking about ten years from now, when explaining his firsthand experience with the deadly combination of a pretty face and a sad, sad soul. The reason he knows anyone can sink deep into that hole and he will never again judge a book by its cover, because of me.
ellis danzel Mar 2016
cotton candy kites clinging to an infinite sea of allusions
temperament changes are frequent forecast and gravity is the only thing standing between me melting like the wax on Icarus' wings.
i am standing too close to the sun.
a star.
a super nova.
how many more **** times am going to have to tell myself that i deserve better than the women i typically swear by?
i'm always eager to pick up the pieces someone left behind.
expunged memories caught in a loop.
feurdian repetition ,
as if it were a competition,
a race to figure who can lose their sanity first.
i do not believe that people who are "in love" are sane.
i do not believe people who aren't are either.
i am not bias
i just think everyone is a little bit crazy sometimes.
bet you thought this would all make sense by now?
that my imagery would make a reappearance and you'd be able to comprehend the vast intel my spoken heart has to offer.
well sorry to disappoint.
this poem is morphing into a rant.
i am not here to crowd please anymore than i am here to shove my pencil up your...
ear.
i have a hard time giving you my heart because it'd just look like i was handing a ******* hand spun cliche.
the women i have dated have their own gravitational pull
and i'd be lying if i told you i didn't believe a single one of them belonged in my galaxy forever, you see
for i am just a comet.
i get trapped for a while, spun around,
doomed to kiss the surface of anything that crosses my path

these words I know to be true.
we are but stars
shining quite different,
yet somehow the same.
where were you?
last night.
when I was calling your name.
and who am I to blame?
for this constant torture,
this particular pain.
my heart, does not follow
a transparent weather vein.
I know these notions to be true.
for this is my world,
and through me, you'll see,
a whole new shade of blue.
brighter than any sky,
yet still saddening,
still maddening.
I often refrain from recanting
my time with you.
each day praying, I'd become
someone new.
this queer life style
is the safest thing I could find.
and I sure hope you don't mind,
the fact that I bind.
you COULD certainly win me over
because YOU KNOW that I'm about
as lucky as a three leaf clover,
and about as melodramatic
as day-time television.
but then,
I guess it would be to assume
that I've grown quite fond of you.
and I don't know...
maybe you'll find this charming.
or  maybe not.
it's just a thought.
I'm just throwing this out there.
with these last few seconds,
to spare.
I bid you adieu with some confusion. if this lust is truly an allusion,
just like the colour of the sky.
I'd like to remain idle near by.
to see what might come of this.
how we might change and grow,
with this.
for I speak these words in truce.
let us forfeit our sanity together.
it might not be so bad to let myself be here,
to be present
with you
these words I know to be true.
Frances May 2018
With anvils for feet, the snails may have moved faster, for their noose of anxiety wasn't pulled so tight. They may have covered more than to that of which I see, though the entire existence of their species  may have been as long as I may had been looking. I would shoot arrows of curiosity without knowing where the target be.
  Just as another fairy tale, relief on my feet was seemingly unimaginable, far fetched and unattainable. Like old change, seeds of a variety filled my pockets. The soil and sun were the only things I trusted. Reaping a sow would be a blessing unto me. After years of crawling, discovering, and disappointing wandering with wide eyes, the hills and peaks had shown as a distraction from the lessening softness of my now calloused hands. The necessity of rest was as strong as the need of a newborn baby's mid afternoon nap, but before the seeds are nestled, work mustn't cease. By every stem, petal, fruit, and butterfly, in the center of the valley of a vast bed of wild flowers would I hope to carry this heaviness no more. The desire for this comfort and caress lead me to find a sweet place to rest. For uncountable hours of wandering, only this would be gratification. I came upon a large patch of dirt as dark as midnight. With every handful of soil wriggling of worms graced my hardened palms. Only the ground saw me enchanted by the romance of its potential. The seedlings would be sung; "As you cuddle in the soil, remember that's where your roots will prepare, unto you this watering will fall, as you are all so loyal, I will be loyal to you, the air will give you care, let me lay eyes upon your beautiful hue, as the sun is what you will see, don't leave the soil bare, set yourself free". In the troughs like dried moats, each seed received a adornment of a kiss like that unto a child by their mother. Every hole doused like that of a spring sunflower, and burrowed into the sleeping dusk of dirt with the expectation of an awakening of a blossom. There, as one expects the rising of the sun, I would await the flowers arrival.
I lay suspended by the freedoms of a remote forest. Within the untouched, unadulterated altruistic scene of remoteness, the skepticism let drained. Knowing my skin may not be slaughtered by reaching thorns, I undressed layers of tattered threads. Most of what would freely escape from my lips were the enticement of belief motivated by bliss and enjoyment. Where my skin remained blushed and dewy from the days after the solstice of summer, to the later days of leaves saying good bye to the trees extended arms, and grass frosted by the baker of autumn, like a lightning bolt strikes at random, as did a stagnancy. The seedlings were viewed upon as the old dark witch from the town: cursed. It was as though they had stage fright and the sun was their audience.
I ask, "why, Lord? Has though forsaken my field? What must I bestow?". Concealed, like a feral cat, was the reasoning for this. As ritual as the church goers Sunday excursion, was my ritual of prayer.
Clouding in my mind happened with contemplation of a new pioneering. I knew this to be only a sliver of land off of the plank of fertile country side. Simultaneous  to this fantasy, a shadow danced in the corner of my eyes. Usually trust worthy was my vision, though it became a mystery. Fear not did I, as I turned to follow the darkness, I saw nothing forthright. It's reappearance came as a *****, but as one would in a sword fight, I followed the elusive figure within my eyes. It was as though there was an unsuspecting solar eclipse at high noon. The figure didn't remain hidden, and the dancing ceased. As a knight removes their armor to cradle a loving partner, he opened his cloak to reveal a man with the most poignant essence of freshly mowed grass, smoldering ashes, and a thanksgiving meal. These things were the quintessence of my childhood. His eyes, not beating, but, like a baby's glare, soft and forgiving, unlike the folktales my father told me. Did my eyes deceive me? Ensorcelled, I had succumb to this. Uncontrollably my eyes repeatedly vertically gaze upon him. I met no gaze, but darkness. While the remembrance of evening tide pull you further if not in recognition of its power, without choice, or fight, I had succumb to this. Weighed down by rocks you couldn't see, as though I was called to my knees. His presence eluded to a parental guide. When I lay there, as I become sunk in the soil, He advised me. "This acreage will be your ball and chain for entering this land. With out excavation, Intentions of leaving your possessions have inhibited exiting though you desire continuation. You must water it with your tears". My golden hair became brown with dirt, and my pale skin so dark, as I wept till the sun grew cold, and the moon graced me like a lullaby with soft illumination.
As a once saturated sponge goes dry, by every last drop, drained dry were my eyes, and the ground enriched. After the clock hit twelve for the 10th night, The reaper spoke again. He said "This land was mine. I set it aside, so those who have evil in their heart may not reap what they sow here, so it may not be robbed of its nutrients for something unwholesome. Within it's enchantment, the soil may only be fertile by those who will enrich it with passion. If you wanted to leave you wouldn't be confined, but if your heart remained, as would you. You will stay until you may leave with something beautiful. This priceless soil belonged to me, as this is where my betrothed had lain. The tables have turned because it has been sowed by a someone who has surrendered to me. Your patients serves you. My dear, The wealth is in your heart." His encompassing gratitude, and cherishment remained, as he had left. The grandfather clock sung to the flowers, as did I.
I was always told only the sun could bring beauty in life. I wore a black veil of naive belief. The garden appeared to always have been misted. The sun kissed my plants so gently, their blooms were welcomes to this realm, and the wind would make them frolic together like a colorful oceanic wave, but instead of dolphins peaking the dense surface, you would see the makers of the garden. Relentless pollinators made the perimeter buzz. You could see the twinkle and flutter of every dragonfly, lady bug, butterfly, and bee as their fluorescent wings caught the sun. Almost as though my life depended on it, like a bear in a cave of constant hibernation, I would nestle myself in this secret garden. Leaving here with nothing but flowers intertwined in my hair, and around my heart.
I want you to know I have not forgotten
all the times and the feelings.
They will always be dear to me
no matter how much time passes.

I want you to know I am not mad
for all the angry letters.
I know you lost a lover and a friend
and I'm sorry it had to happen.

I want you to know that I hope you are happy
because your happiness will always be important to me.
I wish you the best in the years to come
and I know you will be successful.

I want you to know I am concerned
for you and your sisters because of all you must face everyday.
Be strong and take care of them
because some days you are all they have.

I want you to know I am sorry
for everything that happened and all the tears you shed for me.
I know my sudden reappearance brought remembrances of better times
and I didn't mean for it to cut into old wounds.

I want you to know I love you
no matter what happens and no matter how much time passes.
You will always be the first and the memory of your heart
will never fade no matter how many shreds of old love letters I receive.

I want you to know this is goodbye
because I can't stand hurting you with thoughts of what could have been.
I know one day you will find better and this will be a distant memory
but I just pray that memory evokes a smile and not a tear.
Jamie L Cantore Dec 2014
A maker of verses is the refined poet, he does find
Emotional thoughts sublime, inserting some formulae,
Or enigmas that are behind each sustained line, each I

Tell wilt unwind, then that rhyme to be mimed,
The lowest crime in our kingdom mounted up on high.

So if in thy cheerless failure ye seek intense success,
Because ye  subjectsto listlessness of the bodiless
Mind's distress, I request ye give no such inference

It's egress or reappearance from the darkest eclipse
In this; but rather by keenest innovations do impress

-And that protects a poets wisdom from the nuisance.
My thoughts on plagiarism.
-Written November 5, 2012
Courtney Jean Apr 2015
Her eyes.
That's what gives her away.
A hat worn tightly, meeting the top of her eyebrows.
Thoughts racing.
Thinking she finally figured it out.
What this life is about.
What she turned her life into.
Was it worth it,
The outcome of how things are now?
She asks herself, crowed around the ones that are supposed to matter.
..It doesn't matter.
Just a few chapters of things that go unnoticed.
A few people that come & go without a reappearance.
It could be worse. So I've been told.
Of course it can. & it has.
Little by little. Day by day.
Overlooking what could destory me in the future.
My only regret,
not accepting it when it could have made a difference.

-C.J-
Samantha Cunha Nov 2018
Lurking in my mind
are
disruptive thoughts
I may temporarily lose
but always find
these thoughts never
disperse fully
never diminish nor
dim down dully
reappearance of a lost train of thought
I held up the double edged sword
and fought
for
truths I was not ready to handle
blew out the
candle
smoke rose slowly
My god,
you are quite holy
darker thoughts
bring forward an inner truth
never entertain the uncouth
Erin May 2017
She reminded him of a traffic light, always red or yellow or green..
When she laid lazily on their futon, manicured toes hanging off of the edge, he thought that she would never look more beautiful. And when he would wrap his arms around her frail frame, he could only see her kaleidoscope eyes ringed in day old eyeliner and every freckle on the bridge of her nose (her only insecurity). He would finger the gold chain around her neck, carrying the weight of a cracked peridot, and remember that night as her copper head fell softly on his shoulder with a whisper on her lips.
But another layer of her beauty, the one she showed to the outside world, would have been exhibited at his sister’s wedding that March.
For months, she would tow him to various shops on various street corners, seating him on the same uncomfortable bench and forgetting him in the midst of speaking avidly about chiffon with a sales assistant. She would search for her perfect dress: black, slinky, and slit up the leg. An ideal far from what he knew, the girl who laid scrunched up on the couch in her  pajamas at three in the afternoon. The girl who would occasionally ask for hot chocolate in the peak of the summer heat, thin arms draped in a heavy cardigan.
Later that last month, he decided to surprise this girl he knew with a pair of sunshine-coloured heels, just high enough to invite a kiss on the tip of his nose.
She received them the night before the wedding, expertly fragmented contempt in her eyes, and slid them on her feet. And kissing his nose just the way he had pictured, filled his heart with the utmost love for her. Little did he know that in the early hours of the morning, she had slid out from the baby blue covers of their bed and out of their apartment to the community dumpster, carrying the shoe box with her. When she returned, she tiptoed to her closet and pulled out a pair of cherry-red pumps, admiring them and their wicked gleam.
The next morning, air laced with the scent of black coffee, she slipped on her dress and her red heels and became a different person, no longer the frail girl he loved. It was like the flames that had dyed her shoes had lit her too aflame, entering her bloodstream and blackening her thoughts with the excess of smoke, for when she walked out to see him, ‘I ♥ NYC’ mug in hand, she sneered and opened their cookie-cutter door to his utter surprise.
And upon her return, she was once again simmering, her head further inflated with smog. Her dainty ankles were manacled by thin red ribbons, making her new persona permanent. She yelled and screamed and shrieked insults to pierce his vulnerable skin, ignoring his flinching as her clicking heels carried her forward. And when his ears ceased to hear, and thus ceased to satisfy her need for attention, she left a complementary mark on his cheek, the perfect accessory for her wardrobe’s new addition.
The two did not attend the wedding. His sister sent letters profusely, hurt and then confused and then worried, but she would grind them to shred under her spikes and toss them nonchalantly into the shoe box of her beloved’s.
Months later, she was still a traffic light. Some mornings she would wake up next to him and smile a smile that was too big for her face, and he would forget what she had done. His girl had returned and that was all that mattered. But then she would slowly walk back her closet and look longingly at the shoe box that held all of his suffering, and all he could do was hope that the shoes would not make a reappearance. Despite these prayers, they always would and not five minutes later, her would once again become her new accessory, covered in livid bruises and swellings.
Then one day, he felt oddly confident after days, weeks, months, years of living in constant hesitation. And when her light turned red, he disobeyed the law and kept on driving, making it past the light once and for all.
Jenny Sep 2019
she felt nothing, she felt
everything,
she felt the ever present emptiness
slowly gnawing
clawing at her insides, whispering the
relief that could come from succumbing
to its comforting abuse
the caress of an icy blade against
the frantic veins on her neck
that raise themselves every time
she breathes
and her chest rises, only to fall
after all she'd fought against,
after all that she fought for
the blurring of her vision was the last
thing she remembered about him
she wanted nothing to do with his seductive charm
but he was already a part of her, she
brought him every where she went
he used to leave handprints in deep purple paint
around her neck
now, he dug his fingers into her
subconscious, leaching,
bleeding her of her potential
she could feel him, and she feared his reappearance daily
she waited for him
to leave a bouquet of dead roses on her doorstep,
to draw the red morning dew from her wine colored lips
to leave a trail of blackened marks on her hips
to tenderly wipe the tears from the eyes that he made swell
she spent more time trying to convince herself she was well
than she spent outside
most days
she lived through a haze,
and when his ways would alter
after he kneeled at the altar,
she would hold on to those brief moments
so when the honeymoon was over,
she could hold up the frozen and broken
memories of him sober
i do not condone any of these actions, and i do not think that abuse is "comforting" but rather in some twisted way its something that people fall into, here is a link on more of the cycle of abuse:
http://familytransitionplace.ca/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/Cycle-of-Abuse.pdf

— The End —