Stand up tall so they don't know that you're dying.
Plaster on a smile, don't let them see you crying.
Everybody's watching, you can't afford to crack.
Everbody's counting on you; hold all your feelings back.
You're the big sister, you're not supposed to fall apart--
And never let anyone see what's going on in your heart.
Straighten your spine and stand up and smile
And make believe you're cheerful; it's just for a while.
The city's behind me.
I run as fast as I can
As I get into my forest
Escaping from the monsters
That are chasing me.
I look for a place to hide
At this empty, cold life
I'm one step beyond
My own salvation
And one step ahead
I hear whispers in the dark
From desolated souls
That were not able to come back
From their hiding place
That couldn't survive
The monsters of the world.
I must do that
I must fight.
A slightly crooked little smile
upon getting a sense
of the game it all feels to be,
it shouldn't make me tense
as long as I can see...
So I try to take on and play
and yet my shoulder hurt
on a daily basis overcome...
when you turn away into the unknown.
Hide and seek.
fun and free
erratic time given to each other,
Live and learn
get and let go
something to survive one another.
So I try and win a little more
over this weakness I have,
as lust over love does then...
when you return so intimately warm.
You flee and you chase
I take you by the hand
somewhere in between
I adore and I hate
you take me away in the end..
Maybe one of us is to win or lose
or maybe this way no one ever could ...
The word feels foreign on my tongue
Actions make me run and hide
As if no one could ever love someone
As hideous and dirty as me
That's what you want me to believe
That no one will ever love me for the way I am.
So you sit there and whisper in my ear
It's okay, he can touch you like that, this isn't wrong
But it is
He should treat me better.
For a while,
I told myself that I would figure you out
I would understand why you are the way that you are
I would fix you
But it was never that simple
Sometimes, people hurt people just to hurt them
As if they find pleasure in it
You loved to watch me squirm under your knife.
I always thought you loved me
But now the fog has cleared
And I see that it was lust.
you are my ripe and tender peach
yet I strain for just one touch
you're too far away for my reach
exhausted I sit down and cry
distance proves to be too much
wow, I wish that I could fly
I take a breath and give a sigh
a mind filled with mists so deep
in a branch you are way up high
wet from my tears I drift asleep
so tightly held in your leaves
I wake with eyes opened wide
you sway under dawns soft light
my excitement I just can't hide
tender peach, my wondrous sight
Yes I'm in fear
That's why I always tear
Whenever I think of you
I'd feel the wind blow
I'd shiver in place
Exhausted of that trace
The trace you left behind
Made me always hide
Of all what surrounded me
From pain to stress
I then turned into a huge mess
Here I wonder..
If you ever came back, will the pain be less?
You told me you'll be real,
You told me you're here to heal,
You told me you'll never lie,
You told me the truth is you're mine,
Its a lie.
You told me you'll always be by my side,
You told me not to fear anything, you told me you're with me in this ride,
This ache, it seems
To drip through my mouth
To fall from my tongue
To hang from my voice
It speaks louder than I would
And hisses violently
Whilst I tuck it back inside
So I can "smile" for the peoples' eyes
And they do not mind,
They do not take note
As this fear that crept out
Is tucked away in the back of my mind
In the tightest crevice,
in the smallest hole
It fits snuggly until it breaks loose
And cuts through flesh again
Until I cannot compose myself
And until I'm dying again
I "smile" for the peoples' eyes
And assure them it's alright
But inside, it's breaking
It hurts too much
Yet I cannot ease it, so I hide it.
My insecurities are mine, you try to heal but do not feel the insecurities that I conceal, I store them deep within myself, inside a jar upon a shelf, wear a smile braced like a Sheild, protect yourself, fight not too feel.
But you have broke me, mind and soul, kiss the imperfect make me whole, and in return I'll let you see, her who I so wish to be, I'll let you love what I cannot, for you are what I've always sought, perfection in its place a man, with loving eyes and gentle hands.