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Alexandra Askew May 2014
It happened.
It happened.
Repeat.
It happened.
It happened.
No more fighting against the truth
No more of the denial.
It happened.
It happened.
Chant...Breathe.
Repeat.
It happened.
It happened.
Life push me forward.
World steady my feet.
It happened.
It happened.
Focus, hold it.
Breathe.
It happened.
It happened.
Open up your palm.
Memories fall into a holding jar.
It happened.
It happened.
Lock the jar inside.
Darken the lights but remember the presence.
It happened.
It happened...
3 out of 4 of "Stages of My Grief"
Alexandra Askew May 2014
Don't look up.
He'll see into your eyes once more.
Don't breathe.
Liquor of the night will drawn him back.
Don't just stand there.
Move, fight, get away!

Hide.
Just close your eyes, close the door
Hide.
Pray for an ending shot.
Hide.
If you can't find you, he'll be lost.

Blink, nod, smile.
Mask the feelings the swell in hatred.
Blink, nod, smile.
No answer to the past event.
Blink, smile, nod.
Put on the performance of a lifetime.

A plead that memories will leave you be.
2 out of 4 of "Stages of My Grief"
Alexandra Askew May 2014
The tender warmth
Small kisses, just a taste?
Warmth begins to singe
Soft safety holds you down
Tearing at flesh
Grit, sand, dry- all overwhelm the senses
Skin peels away
Muscle burns to ash, blowing away in the wind
Skeletal contraptions, lurking.
Only one left.
Ribs cage what words could not
Concrete and cold
Nothing to Nothing.
Eh lol
Alexandra Askew May 2014
Memories.
Filling the void between realities.
Each of your words
A reverberating tune,
Telling me over and over
A twisted sense of your ego.

Surviving id all that I have after you.
Each movement.
Each breath.
Each thought,
All constantly calculated to fight for life.

Battle my eternal fear
As I stomach seeing your face.
Courageously push past your body,
Closing my eyes,

As if reality was just a nightmare,
As if your essence never once
Forced itself upon my skin.

No.

Your hands grasp blindly in the darkness,
And for now,
In my mind,
I am gone.
4 out of 4 of "Stages of My Grief"
Alexandra Askew May 2014
Trust.
Friendship.
Loyalty.
Promises.

Trust.
The one thing that I gave willingly.
The one thing that held worth.
Every word kept close.
Every moment feeling as safe as the last.
Until it was destroyed.
Until it broke myself and my heart.
All in one night.
Trust.

Friendship.
A connection I favored.
A connection that meant everything in my life.
Holding me up when I was low.
Holding my heart when daggers searched for it.
A relationship mistakenly strong.
A relationship turned cold.
All in one night.
Friendship.

Loyalty.
You had my “back.”
You had my everything.
Showing me your faithful hands.
Showing me your the adherence I needed to pull through.
Tear off the shroud that misted around us.
Tear off the secret lie I never once knew.
All in one night.
Loyalty.

Promises.
Let us talk about the binds of spoken word.
Let us say how easily they are formed in the night.
Begging for that one declaration to happen.
Begging that you held up this one expectation.
God if only the blind were not dumb.
God if only the precaution was taken to heart.
All in one night.
Promises.

Trust.
Friendship.
Loyalty.
Promises.

All in one night.
Beginning of a 4 part Senior Project, Entitled "Stages of My Grief"
Alexandra Askew Aug 2017
I love you.
Do you?
I love you.
What about when I-
I love you.
How?
I love you.
I don’t deserve-
I love you.
Really?
I love you.
I didn’t mean to be so-
I love you.
Why me?
I love you.
I’m not as pretty as-
I love you.
Are you sure?
I love you.
I just can’t stop the thoughts and-
I love you.
You love me?
I love you.
Even with everything, the fear, the worry, the-
I love you.
Love me?
I love you.
I’m sorry, I do this I-
I love you.
...Promise?
I love you.
I hope so because...
I love you.
I love you too. I love you too.
Alexandra Askew May 2014
Concealing, masking.
Holding together one being
Stretching, tightening.
A suit never to take off
Smooth, soft.
Protecting the vulnerability
Color, texture.
Pouring out blood and oil
Wrinkling, pruning.
Always layering more
Strong, weak.
This is something I just began to wrote and haven't found the time to finish it.
Alexandra Askew May 2014
An adventure book
That is all it was
Wars, dragons, queens, kings, chivalry...
Just faces, just dreams.

Eyes gazing down
Hiding in a castle from the evil
A lord, a knight, crying for battle

Swarming in the mind
The want to take hold, bring back
Nothing shall be the same
Grasping strings, never getting
An innocent's heart.

Creatures just appear, dark and light
Laughing from the run
A mermaid, a witch, brewing an icky stew

Life would be easier,
Problems just solved,
Happiness a blink a way.
No more sadness,
Just the adventure book.
One of my first poems from my senior year.

— The End —