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 May 2014 Zero Zaneh
kailasha
I am my biggest enemy,
I am my best friend.
I push myself of the ground
And criticize my self.

Then I'm the stretched out hand
Who picks me and brushes me off
I say the words that inspire me
Make me cry at first, and then laugh.

No one can take me away
From the person residing within me.
It tells me what to say,
Also the correct way to behave.
It sees what my eyes see,
it understands what I feel.

The truth is, I rule me.
The truth is, I'm not sure if any of the above makes sense.
 May 2014 Zero Zaneh
Fenix Flight
White powder
NO
its definitally not Flour

Clear bitter liquid
NO
It's definitally not water

Needle after needle
NO
Its definitally not a doctor's shot

All these addictions
All these Drugs
Swirlled around me

But I didnt touch them
I kept away
I had my own

Little White pills
NO
they aren't my ADHD medicine

Swallow them
Snort them
Take me away

Blissful numbness
To zoned out to think
Perfect sanctuary

The high
I could Fly
I was invincible

The Crash
the reality came back
with a harsh flash

Needing more pills
to keep the high strong
More and more

More
more
more

Suddenly
They are gone
Leaving me to my own Devices

My stomach turns agaisnt its self
Can't keep anything down
Twisting painfulling in knots

A Cold sweat breaks
Shaking so hard
can't think straight

I need them
I need them
I need them

Pray for death
Pray for pills
Pray for this to end

I need them
I need them
I need them

"oh she has the flu"
Stupid doctor
what do you know?

can't you see
my desprete need
My need for those little white pills

I
Need
THEM

Months go by
feels like eons
feels like I'm in hell

Without them I am plauged
by horror and pain
depression peaking

Slowly my body heals
My need dims
My need disapates

5
years
go by

Addiction no more
Dependent no more
Little pill free

But every now and then
I feel that itch
just below my skin

the itch for a pill
for the numbness it brings
Every now and then

No matter how sober
I will always be recovering

Because when you were addicted to pain meds
It's hard not to relapse
Yes I use to be addicted to Oxy when I was fourteen turning fifteen. I never told anyone. I never went to rehab, I was forsed into recovery when my friend whose pills I stole cut me out of his life becuase of his own additcion to Coke, Never knowing he was saving my life in the process. Hawk <3
 May 2014 Zero Zaneh
Hayleigh
I bit open a lie and it tasted like you.
 May 2014 Zero Zaneh
Fenix Flight
You're lucky I wasnt there
You're lucky I did not see
Because If I had
you would still be in the cold hard ground
But I'd be in Jail
not loosing a wink of sleep
to someone who even Hell is to kind for
 May 2014 Zero Zaneh
Fenix Flight
HUH
You have Cunfuzled
the cunfuzled
in the cunfuzlment
Art of cunfuzlism

if you dont understand
then you just arent
as cunfuzliness as we
something me and my co worker Mariah just came up with ****
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