On the off chance this
Once discarded lothario
Older than a mud pie
In Borneo
Longing like rain in a desert
On the corner of sixth
Avenue and emerald street
Nearer the brothels than any temple long time met a cake
Of soap just clinging
To a sliver of one might call hope
Blathering wistfully
Though
Redeyed lack of sleep not crying
Clothes ***** as Moses
In Jerusalem on the sabbath when it was Jewish
And Islam wasn't a religion
Before the slayings at
Jericho
Almost old enough to remember
But has been told  about Jezebels wicked witches and fallen angels
All of that ****
Stood under a pine near a stop sign with faith hoping he'd see you again.
Reading the bible.

Gots.
We.
We gots
Like lots beautiful souls here mixed in with lots
are .
Bunches.
    High
        Troubled
             everything's.
Put on a cleft
Gonna be drawn out
Lots
Low ******* lower notes
Some fast fingered high
With sharp c
A few flat e
And a passe
In the mid
        .
        .
Rumble soft.

Half note high flute
           --

Tap snare drum where there a second later the orchestra begins all loud clamor building an immense rise you don't think it can get louder but it dies and roaring comes

Startling silence.
Amen.

i.)  What comes after i.)

Oh yeah.

ii.) ******* having a rush from this absinthe

iii.)  Go back to i.)

Moist petal flower spread
Those earthen made beautiful
Red wings like
Birds do fly fly out Among the skies
Above
Do not be bound by
Rules or norms no man
Ever made or normality
Or dread
You're silk
You are the songs
Butterfly's
Make
Abandoning
This ground.
Yours are earthen cries
Made heard that change
This world
And come a day then
When unfurled
The sky shall open up
Heaven on this earth.

And so
I've patterned
Myself after a
Robin
All fluttery

Times tough
In the trees
Shrubbery
And worm
Catching biz

Got a nest
To build
By spring
You see
Only so
Many feathers
To wit

So treacherous
The sky
Has become
Busy with
Stealing mockingbirds
Titmouses a stray
Blue ******* jay
Amiss

Then all
Done with a home
A lazy cowbird
Comes
Lays her egg
Amongst my own
Goes wandering
Away

And I like
robins do coo
And caw at
Early mornings
Do
Feed the orphans
The deranged

Then when
This nest
Is overflowing
With upturned
Beaks all
Calling for
Worms for sustenance
I make do
With what
I catch
Or borrow
Or steal

Just ******* coo

Just give me
A twelve pack
Olde English
A carton of cigarettes
A working lighter
And 3G data connection
A big bottle of febreeze
Ramen noodles and water
One roll of Scott's tissue
I could be a recluse
And probably write a poem
That made sense.
Maybe I'd run off with
The mouse
Never to be heard from
Again.

Imagining when she used to fill it
Up with dandelions and greens
Set it the middle of the dining room table she bought
Same old thrift store she got
The flower covered vase from
And the old yellowed tablecloth
And it was always filled
With whatever wildflower or **** she could pick
And it signified in a way
Our love and dedication
How though poor we were so rich
And I appreciated then.
The tablecloth is put up
The vase sits empty.
The yard is filled with dandelions
And blooming clover
Lush greens growing wild.
Just like my heart.

This rain
Seems like
A million
Heartbreaks
Crashing
Down

Holding close to that little prayer book
All the way down the street
To
Those big arched doors
There
In Vincennes
Where
The congregation all dressed
In
Sundays best finest dresses
Polished
Shiny black shoes
Brass
Candle sticks lighting
Every
Row of pews
Little
Girls and boys all
Five
The Evans kids
Three boys two
Girls
Walked every Sunday
Morning
Their parents always
Stayed
At home
Wonder
What they did?

The infatigable undefeatable Maurice Brown
Played the tuba down on
First street. Freelanced.
I saw him once spanking that ***
On Mardi gras
Long ago.
I sent him a shot of Bourbon
And a jack back then
So admiring of his
Oomph oomph bellow
His large belly fit that brass
So well.
He was backbone of the street
Musicians marching proud
Through those streets lined
With drunks pickpockets
**'s pimps and beggars three.
All he cared about was that driving deep sound
The shot brought him
In the needle after
Performing.
I saw him last time ten years ago
Asleep in the gutter down on brown street.
Alone his tuba
Gone.

Ever when came once
On the whispers
Of a chanced
Breeze dancing through
The tall limbs of
Old trees standing
Proud as monuments
On a hill
I chanced
One day rising on
A hill alone
After brushing bare legs
Through tall prairie
Grasses long
Way then was the
Tops of oaks maples growth
That existed before my
Conception in a way
Meant to grow
Awaiting to convince me
Of the awe fraught with
Discovering
Every step taken
Can be

Pieces
On the floor scattered
Sharp edges fragments
Fell random
Under things on them about
Them just laying
Like an artist
Painted
A thousand hearts
Torn

Such madness sought for reasons
Old the stories heard
At mother's knee once
A kind of breed the songstress
Sings once told
Oh sadness longs to be brought
Forth be strung on chords
Echoes from the mountain tops
Once inspected felt the dreams
Try to break through reality
Cause men to bow
And women weep
For what end
We do not know
Just feelings come
And will not go
Till sung
Wrote or spoken
Well
Crazy is another
Realm

That is within and about the eyes
This thing we seek the tear
The sight of one love the pure
All gaze over long lashes
That twinkle thus sparkled
In memories fondness
That thus men spend fortunes
Discovering women stand
Long days searching horizons
Child-like innocence
Depth and heart yes
Heart resides there
One blink told me
Then

Her dark circles two
In her eyes where
I dove deep
Into
Those black pools
In the center
Of doe eyed
Green
Irises the white cream
Eyes
Attentive
My eyes they studied
Made circles took me
My aura in
Undressed me
Wanted lusted
Sighed her two lips
Parted
Red lush
Almost agony
Time seemed
Sighs became touches of arms
Legs brushing
Dances in
Dim light backlit
From a fire
A flame a
Warmth sound and pure
Nature animal sure
A rushing waterfall a sky of no limits
A mountains tall majesty
A prairie fair spread
Before us
A feast
Of targeted greed need wanton
Abandon together
Just us
And heaven
Envying

Massively small and incredibly molecular within the all that revolves around this existence
Am I electron orbit or neutron
Center or just black matter
In all this conundrum?
Have I mass enough to
Gravitate another celestial body
Close or am I spinning in my
Own orbit around just a
Speck and thus
Just time and space surrounded by nothing more but vacuums?
And were I perchance a hyperbolic arc on Sky's dark
Would I glow for some
Smaller being perhaps
An unseen being on the
Outer electrons of a hydrogen
Atom. Just carbon. Bonds.
Space and time.
I wonder
A lot.

Blessed are the young
The animals
The mountain people
The charmingly innocents
****** I seemingly
Am smart enough to see
But too dumb to act
I get glimpses though
In dreams
Visions come to me
And go
As quick as light
At a flick
I ponder half awake
A cigarette glowing the
Last dregs of last
Nights keg
Running through me
So I ****
Think reminiscent
Of the visions
Last nights tempting the
Day breaking
Again and nothing
Changed.
Who hasn't?

It predates birth
Exists for life
Goes on after death

Once the causality came raining down and the differences were known like how actions are irretrievable ten tons of actuality
Weighed upon me. It happened one rainy day under a tin roof with leaks that sent drops on my cheeks like tears. I looked out through foggy lensed reality and supposed this was it. Truth.
****. Truth was foggy.
Reality was a dream.
All I'd known sensed felt believed
Could it be just visions of fairy dust cauldrons boiling mystique
Imaginations  false realisms?
Was all my life like the waves of heat on pavement waving. And had my time been spent
Hastily?
As the rain found ways through the tin My
senses  returned
Briefly
Still uncertain
I looked out from
The roof
And the rains chatter
To find
A rainbow
On the far side the long field
Of wheat
Glowing
High above the pine  grove
East of there and here and now and then
I lost it
Crying
I'll never know the answers
But I've
Come close

Its kiddie hour
With buttons hats
Now
To push and laugh
A circling wheel to
Ride all day
Giggle
Gayly
And scream
All day now here we
Go a
Kindergarten
Kinda gotta
Bring those youngens
In to keep up
You know.
God
I'm getting
Old.

Its a concert when I go
A festival
Woodstock reincarnated
A musical

Dancing in the streets
Mardi gras
Cats on hot tin roofs
Mystical

Gotta dig the unknown
Dark sides
Of all moons

Nothing to be ' fraid of
Its natural
Gather all
'Round

A large pyre
Let's get all
Magical
Light my fire

Just another
Phase
Of all this
Worlds pages

Turning a leaf
As it were
Into a novel

Just no ways to bridge the miles
That span the distances
Tween that first step
And the last, darling

Trail the back forty where
Shouts disappear into
Nothingness or go far up
The hills echoing
Into mornings into
Stories

Storied tales the brave tell
Like proverbs said
On prophets tongues
Or made up
Fairies breaths
Resound

On every path that led
To there from here
Or roundabout
Through brush
And weeds the wind
Does.
Bring.

A certain taste, a tongue
One touch of flesh
A night among
The purest
And the fair.

How then becomes this
Long away longing call
On winters dying gasp
Along a sliver of
A chill

This only fate, my dear,
My sweet, this but a faintest
Breeze, that calls my
Ear to render tender
Whispers
Of the leaves.

Pains me
Stains my soul
How
****** up me
And society are
We ask for it

Every time
We take a pill
Throw a party
Drink in front
Of our kids
Then

Act dumbfounded
As toofless
Hillbillies
When our kids
Do the same

Hell
They got too much
Energy
Take them to the
Doctor
Put them

On mind
Altering
Medications
So's we
Get a little
Peace

And johnny
Can sleep
Little jenny
Ain't crying
We can
Spoon her

The pablum
For Christmas
Buy them gadgets
To get on
The internet
Play war

Like the big kids
Have them join
JROTC as soon
As you can
Let's build
Good soldiers

Out of
Them
Then cry aghast
As one
Who can't see
How the ****
This happened.

Really?

Then  memory so
Real
Like a day in the
Park taking
Pictures
Of your three
Year old daughter
And son still
In diapers
Relapsed
Into
Guilt loss and
Black
Stood without purpose
That loneliness
Divorced
OK
Two times a month
I see them
And you know
A man
Is not supposed
To cry.

Used to be
Simply
Reading 'riting 'rithmetic
Little kids sat and dreamt
But seems now
Since Columbine
Those letters stand
For running 'rithing react
Quickly to loud bangs
Lock the doors
Hide under desks
Wait for swat
Pray you make it.
Let's thank all the drugs
Given to kids
Since birth when they
Cry too much
Or throw a fit
Thank the NRA
And your on the dole
Senators and representatives.
Thank the mental health cutbacks
In the budget
Thanks deadbeat parents.
Thanks to society for
Making life the things we
Value least.
But hero's and martyrs
Have been made too,
Along with all the dollars
For reelection campaigns.
So, next time your child heads off
For school
Hug the ******* hell
Out of them.
It just may be
The last chance
You ever get
To tell them
That you love them.

It's
Only the times
The bells chime
And the doors open
But
No cuckoo comes out
That
Worries me
Now

There I was trying to put some of this stuff on an SD card I bought
At radio shack .  I had 32 Gigs available.
I plugged it in my ear.
Heard a click a buzz
Then whirring.
My head felt lighter
Seemed my programs run
Quicker my hands no longer
Tapped while my eyes waited. I felt more adept agile more
Like my hard drive spun freer.
After the download of my selected prefrontal cortex
Onto that little non-volatile
Chip the system rebooted.
A message from Microsoft
Appeared saying:
"Updating operating system, do not turn off Karl"
Just then
Thunder roared every animal in the house huddled up to me
And the power went off.
I searched everywhere
In the closets
Under sinks in boxes I hadn't seen since I moved a year ago,
I couldn't find the boot discs
For my windows 10 human
Operating system creators edition. I was condemned
To a blue screen
Forever.
So don't forget
To, on your operating system,
Check the box labeled
Sync virtual you operating system backup
Or Google clouds for your synapses
Free 111
Gigabytes

There is no madness
Darker farther
Than the depths
Of losing a daughter
I sit now praying
Her soul is
In heaven
And everyday
Is peace and warmth
And how I mourn
Her memory
Study her every feature
And how I
Wish to be again
Her father
And kiss her forehead
Tell her I love her
But grace is fallow
And nature cruel
And bad things
Can happen I knew
But I was only
Thinking that
The very day
You skinned your
Knee biking
I never knew
I'd be forever
Cursed to dream
Without you

Once I had these words afloat
They seemed to gain
A life of their own
They straggled along
A rivers edge
Into a field
And never left
The urge to find
The perfect scene
Of tulips buttercups
Everything
Like crystal flows of sparkling
Water straight out
The mountains tops
Like fluffy clouds
All gay so free
Like all that was
Once a mystery
Like lips they spoke my name
In angel tongue so virginally
Amazed I could
But admire she
That muse that
Doth inspire me.

Valentines
If read with your ear
On their breast
Beat loud
Enough to make
You sigh

Just one bonnet babe
A bonnets a hat
Wear two if you can't choose
No
Those shoes don't make you look fat
The earrings are nice
So wear the diamond ones in your left ear  the pearls in
The right
No I can't see any ***** line
OK the limos outside babe
Yes that gator purse goes well with your hose
I love fishnets
No I don't like the ones
Your sister wore last night
I didn't even notice
Can we go sweetheart
The limo driver says he has to get gas
He can't idle all night
Yes the kids will be fine with uncle Marv
And aunt Bess
I did I did remember to write down all the numbers and give them to Marv and Bess yes especially 911.
I wrote it real bold in black marker
Its gonna be a blast baby
If we ever get there its only the celebration for our second months anniversary.

Ole McKarl had a farm
Eieio
And on that farm he had
Missy
Eieio
With a cat cat here
And a cat cat there
Here a cat
There a cat
Everywhere a cat cat
Eieio
Ole McKarl had a farm
Eieio
And on that farm he got Daisy
Eieio
With a woof woof here
And a woof woof there
Here a woof there a woof
Everywhere a
Woof woof
Ole McKarl had a farm
Eieio
And on that farm he
Fell in love
Eieio
With a DiAnne here
And with DiAnne there
Eieio
Old McKarl had a farm
Eieio.
And on that farm all his beloved Eieio.
Were gathered round his feet and arms
eieio.
They gave him love and warmed his heart
Eieio
Ole McKarl had a farm
Eieio
And on this farm he
Gave his heart
Eieio
With a kiss from DiAnne
Here and a kiss kiss
There
Here a kiss there a
Kiss
All the animals
Watching this.
EIEIOOOOOOOOOO!

Recharge then....rest....relax meditate dream about us under our Willow tree  cats dogs around    maybe a goat
A chicken the sun
Setting
So....
Look...on the horizon...right in between here  there  and yonder, on the last light of sun through the whispering willow branches dancing for us seems a path on the black night a light through the distance a view of us glancing at heaven together

proceed

can one
of flesh and blood
of need and hunger of
survival instincts innocent
Be holy
one with any god
or true
to any love

I taste the
retinue the pink the red
of a heart true

feel scent absorb
condense

into her

I felt the cries as hunger comes

lion calls
innateness

inimitably unquestionable
impressions of my ancestors with

warmth taken
off a soft lip
a bare breast tip
standing

out the limbs
of an old oak
in a forest in December bare limbed
naked
calling

features worn into man’s
everyness
there
in the womb even
born into
sovereign  minds
inculcated into
common consciousness
swollen into
***** timelessness

Find everyone's escape
Take their advantage away
In the brush
Stripes camouflage
There Shadow's highlights
Mix and fuse
Confuse the mind's eye
Into the whorl of
Leaves limbs and refuse
Into too much data
Therefore I go
Tripping a light
With gray shadow
With an array of quick
Hand moves
Stealthy crawls
The depth calling
Out wild
Inside me without
An
Enemy
Nor friend or foe
But Destiny

Wouldn't it be crazy wonderful
To see in person some of
The most noted Wordsworth's
And personalities that
Hello Poetry has to offer?
August 15th would be good
Here in Clayhatchee Bamalama
In the south with nothing else to offer but the woods and cornstalks the peanut dust air.
It would be a festival. A face to face to finally meet the poets I admire and describe in my head by their words and their profile.
I'm about to start a gofundme page to make the wildest dreams come true. Imagine Eliot greeting you in person.
Its gonna be tie-dye only and sandals dress. (Weeds illegal here and the price high as hell, so bring your own)
Load up the vw van with all your poet friends.
Entrance fees waved to those
Bringing their own soap and toiletries. Oh, and beer....or ***....whisky....tequila.... Etc.

Sounds like the sun setting
When you get sad baby
Sounds like the moon refusing
To get up
It says **** all this
I'm taking the night off
Sounds like all the traffic
Outside rubber
Asphalt wheel bearing brakes
When you said
You come home from work
To no one
I looked up at the neon sign
Annie's Convenience Store
Crickets minnows
Some nameless CIG
Advertised
$3.59
And felt the same 1000
Or more miles away
And all I can do
Say
Is kiss you in words smack that *** virtually
To get you to smile I
Say stupid **** and verbalize how
I talk to the stars

And they all know your name

Don't
     Wanna
           Conform
Nevertheless

Just as lime
As the soil
Integrates
Sinew and bone
Tastes
All that made man
Into a lad

Just a breeze
Insinuated
Weakness in sight of
An oak trees majesty
Or a
Steeple
Browned eyes askew
Down tween everlast
And yesterday
Came

Gonna
After a second
Examining the rise of her
Breast the darker
Pink of an ***** ******
Extending
The length of a second
The wealth of a lucky man.
Gonna
Just take a look slow all round the peak curvatures
Compare the pink
With the almonds the mauves
And cinnamons drink
Of  pallmall nicotinic
Sweats and long pauses
Now
I cull
Annihilate
The culinary incarnate
Etching with a
Claw on rock  her
Taste
Pawn her
Platinum diamond
For a soda and chips

Has a name
this everyday
Just another one like any
The name is not necessary
For it to be special
Call it what you will
It is today

Scrupulously second by second
A timekeeper sits at his desk
Near the tallest mountain
Riding a cloud one would guess
Tabulating only plusses and minuses reams of paper accumulating
Behind him
Keeping scores almost blind
Deaf and dumb
To secular or pagan
Reasonings and mores
No more
And no lesser
Just calculating
Everyman
For everything

Almost I want to help him
Throw in my impressions
But ignore
Me us


He does
Balances

The ledger

As want
   Of greedy eyes
Turn bold
     In view
Of  pristine
      Mountaintops

In sights
    Of  female
tender folds
In supple Petals
    Of a rose

As breaths
     Of impassioned
Lovers sighs
      As love should
Be immortalized

'Tis there go
      You and I
As wild as tame
       As the lion
And lamb

Stronger deeper
      Every day
To heights
       Of ecstasy
To dream

The dreams
      No man
 Has ever dreamed
      Before

Midday weirdly
foisting
           Gay
balloons of water out
            
tomorrow's tears wave
In brightly colored sheets
Of cotton snowfall

August

Last year

Last night
      Last night
             Laaaàaaast night!!!!

To cuss **** out
     Last year
           Last year
                Laaaaaàast year!!!!

To last year....
      May you just go
              May you go  
                  Fuuuuccccking  go!!!

She  
Stands for me!

Dressed up
All Pink and white
Glowing from tip to
Outspread reach

Hummingbird
Wings
Decorated

Both in sun in
Moon
A buzz

The chorus of nature
Majestic ingeniously
Being the freshest
Breath of
Spring

Of hope and
Beauty
Fair

I resolve to break my resolution.

alone
just me
in skin in bone
a collection of neurons
spinning protons
a dance of
small components
one in the spinning
universe
a plastic plasma thing
able to comprehend
I think
the thrill
of this given ability
to touch
another
living
human
being

to my delight,
   for I was only six months away
      from letting her know
           my dreams and desires,
she asked me
    out of the blue
        to lunch with her
            sit-down, not buffet;
as she proffered
    the offer her eyes
           kind of sparkled
               and she tilted her head
to the left, touched
    her hair... now this
          was unexpected a tad urgent
               as I rewrote  
                 the novel-erased all my fears.
She touched my forearm gently
     and I saw
              sparkles and fireworks
                   and candlelit dinners
as all that
     would utter from
               my mouth agape
                     over and over again
was hells yes....hells yes