"withought" poems
Why do they say knitting needles go 'click'?
It's more of a 'squeak', 'shuffle', 'tap', 'shuffle'.
Is it the same way that rain doesn't 'splash'?
It goes 'drop', 'plop', 'thud'.
These are the thoughts that rise to the top as I sit
And knit.
Thoughts aren't threads to be woven
They are patches to be stitched together- each one a new colour.
Grey is when my brain won't stop- the colour of school uniform.
White is when I'm scared and alone- an ethereal mist.
These are the thoughts that rise to the top as I sit
And knit.
Recently there's been a lot of green- warm and swirling like a gemstone.
It is like marble in its pattern, layers of shades overlapping.
That's what your patches are. And here I'm
Trying to not think of you but you rise to the top as I sit
And knit.
I notice a burnt orange- like lava bubbling over a cool skin.
That is quiet anger. Not at you.
Not at me for thinking of you.
At the one who thought I could stop.
It is impossible, especially when I don't want to stop as I sit
And knit.
Even as I tried to write a poem withought you.
I couldn't.
You're here again- and these are just the ones I wrote down.
All these thoughts of you rise to the top as i sit
And knit.
May 26, 2014
May 26, 2014 at 5:44 PM UTC
My big headed people said ity, i trusted, 'hiriz' has never dissapointed themy,
my hatred for non conformity, enormous, i surely hated the conformity truly,
i almost lost it for 'hiriz' sakey, **** it, ill never have wanted to lose this beauty,
i had it weirdly thinking ablazey, loozing?, no, i hadnt and you n they didnt realize fastly,
loosing soo fast about lowly sinking sinly,curse all day i ,ever had thee meeting to lyfy,
wit all the a vitue TRUELY INVESTMENT *** no lievly, forget me darl; once and for ever dony
one more what you waznyt quetly, cool openly, man must lively sweetly
that a day woud spoily truely, madly mey, sooooooo losty i had made a choisy,
refusing my being theiyyyyy, lucky me doing, buty, i love thater that am no longy
your timey was wanting by virtuey, truey. luck **** spyty this shiety oul
endy began truely sure truelly, fukciey, its thats badyy, me lost it shortlley
man must livevy or diiey, truely, gotta ity, man look for bread i wannaity
withought even hiriz it all worked welly, herey, i am. fu**** like ity
dead
Oct 22, 2012
Oct 22, 2012 at 12:28 PM UTC
You couldn't help her
It's not your fault she wasn't meant for this
She didn't mean to hurt you
Didn't intend to do you harm
You tried hard to be there
Through the storms and the seasons
The deaths and the births
But you were always static
Easily tuned out
She said she had to find out for sure
Didn't say goodbye, left trinkets on the doorstep
She didn't even knock before going
Desperate for a change she said
It's not your fault she left
Not because you weren't there
You were when you could
No one could've asked so much of you
You tried until you failed again
Years passed and you're still not good at this
People change too quickly to grab hold of
Couldn't hold her back if you tried too
People are always leaving
You knew this before you were born
Your sister lost herself in the woods
Your Mama stopped the emptiness with a train
Surely it wasn't on purpse they fled
Just a chance you were passed along hands
Played with and loved, safe until you weren't
A throw away kind of freind
She was everything
The light on the blades of grass in the morning
The moves and swirls of sunshine
Your world defined in a coat of gold
You had no one
A steady stream of faces that were gone with the tide
No one was ever tied to you
Always you to them, bound with thread
She became a boulder to hold
Carry with you in your pocket
An anchor with a beating heart
Keeping you tethered in this life
It's not your fault she's gone like autumn leaves
That everyone's been clammering to escape
The world and you too
They're just tired of this place
Don't cry for those that went
They're happier without you to take up space
You were just a bug to be squashed
An inchworm who couldn't crawl
Trouble happens around corners
You couldn't see it brewing in the distance
Didn't do anything to keep them safe
They choose their paths away
You'll just need to live again
Paint a smile across your face to hide the fear
Cover up the scars and scratches
Remake your world withought her
You'll be alright in the end
Though the grass might dance above your head when it all ends
There's those who've made do with less
You should feel blessed at one more lifeless day
And in the end you were just
A **** growing in the flowers
A bad seed that strangled all you held dear
Leftover when the leaving starts
But it's not your fault
Oh my dear it's not your fault
You can't be what you are not
This was never about you sweet heart
It's not your fault and neither is she
Jan 14, 2015
Jan 14, 2015 at 1:36 AM UTC
I am what you only Dream bringer of Justice and Revenge. Time has put me on top the time is near for your end. My Life was given as a Death to live withought life was placed on my soul. To live live withought hope to love withought faith. That's the way of the times. Live to be hopeless drink to die in vein no one has time to give a **** I will numb the pain erase the hurt make it fine to live and roam in your head. For I am the one you fear. I see everything choose not to react in time. Hope is what ive killed where is your faith believe in me for I will be your only out. I will be given Revenge.
Sep 21, 2013
Sep 21, 2013 at 11:37 AM UTC
Too tired to stay awake. Too scared to go to sleep.
I close my eyes
And the nightmares creep
They shadow over every wall
They jump and shout
They whisper and crawl
I try to keep from letting them win
These nightmares are only my thought deep within
So I listen to music to block it all out
but it won't fricken work they're just way too loud
And then the tears begin to fall down
As I stare at this screen because I daren't look around
I sit there a rock backwards and fourth
Backwards and fourth
I sit there and rock backward and fourth
Until I wake up in the morning's light
And this thing hasen't happened just one or twice
Why do you think that i'm up at this time?
Do you think I just deprive myself of sleep?
Do you think I'd lie about all these things?
Do you think that I'd make you read these words?
If all that it were was a way to be heard?
No.
Since the seventh of Feb 200 and now
I haven't slept without freaking out
can't properly sleep because I see his face
and when I do it scares me for days
I see him so cold lied there all alone
And no one can help him or bring him back home
There's just so much
That I will always regret
And there's so much more that I should have said
I wish I could change it go back and be there
Dad
I'm sorry
I should have been there
I should have seen the signs
I should kept you from losing your mind
I should have known
If I had known
I could have helped
I could have saved youur life
Saved you from all of that unfairness and strife
NO one should have to deal with that
especially someone as amazing as you
Dad
I miss you.
I don't know what to do.
Please tell me what to do?
Dad I don't have a clue.
They say I will move on with my life
But you're my hero
my king
my everything
I will always need you
I will always need you back
I just can't seem to chose the right path
To go down anymore
I need my daddy back
To help me live, to help my heart heal and soar.
So come back.
Please.
Come back.
Dad.
Withought you.
I can't
Sleep.
May 31, 2014
May 31, 2014 at 9:29 PM UTC
Smile like a killer
The trials of a sinner
Now its our winter
Cold lifeless fingers
Grippin heart pixels
Giving art wrinkles
Lets try too be civil
Always stuck in the middle
Hoping youll get it
Im fealing pathetic
My heart is infected
And i know u wont let it
Die if you hold it
Im just trying too own it
Paper heart folded
Razorsharp moments
If u want it set in stone
I wont let u go
my head is full
Of impulsive dead pulse miracles
Unethical letting you get the tools
Needed for the best of you
Lets improve set the mood just dont get confused in solitude
This is what i wanted from you
And needed ill repeated or keep it a secret just know your my weakness my princess not leaving
Ever withought being together i fell for u and i can tell that you fell for me all the way down
Ill let emotions tell the story now
May 29, 2014
May 29, 2014 at 3:02 AM UTC
High up on a mountain
The grains of these rocks define my memories
On a cloudy day
Cold breeze coming my way
Inhale the fresh air
As you see everyone stare
Withought a worry or care
You keep climbing and climbing
Distracted by the view
The only thing missing is you
Jan 28, 2019
Jan 28, 2019 at 10:33 PM UTC
Is there anything that truly lives forever?
Is it love, happiness, wisdom?
Life & peace?
No sir, not even these.
We all must accept,
that to which has a beginning
must have an end.
For love can not spring,
until we experience hate.
Happiness can not flourish,
unless someone knows sorrow.
Wisdom cannot be attained,
untill one has seen his own mistakes.
Life can not exist,
withought a birth from a mother.
And peace can not manifest itself,
until one experiences war.
So to must everything have a beginning
and an end.
But with what may die,
ought to give life to the next.
Dec 10, 2013
Dec 10, 2013 at 5:08 PM UTC
Theres something about metal
Holding solid steel in my hands
Feeling its weight
Knowing it too was born from this earth
I admire every piece i come across
As i think what it is i could do with it
Having the knowledge to shape it
Having and image and to make it
Unmoved withought significant force
When wielded or worn
I feel so strong
Im going to make a suit of armor
Apr 22, 2016
Apr 22, 2016 at 6:51 AM UTC
I can't say goodbye!!
I just can't bring myself to do it.
I don't know if i ever will be.
What little bits i have left of you are
All of me.
All i know.
And if i let you go, then i fear the stuff i will see.
I fear that i will be empty.
That i won't feel your courage and Hope guiding me.
I won't feel you next to me.
Don't you understand!
That withought you i am doomed
Standing in quicksand, with no help...
No way out.
However much i scream and shout.
So Please Forgive me Mum for keeping hold of you...
As just the thought of letting you go...
Letting go of my memories of you...
Are/is the last thing on this earth i would willingly do
May 15, 2019
May 15, 2019 at 3:11 AM UTC