Years away
A pen put down

A dream lost
A friend forgotten

Now I find them
And lift them up

Life ongoing
World spirling

Love returning
Like rewriting

Hello old friend
And welcome home

A dance of pull and push back
A fist encircling a heart
Clutching, Squeezing
Power on one side
Pleading on the other
Out of control
My stomach feels sick
My mind blank
Grasping toward where you were
Spirling into past comforts
Delusional daydreams
Days become memories as they happen
Irrefutable anger
Violence on the body
A mind of blame and contortion
You lay out boxes I can’t fit into
Telling me to get in
I can’t breathe, but you tell me to melt like water and flow.
All I ever wanted was some pull from you
Acceptance and patience of my becoming
But all you know how to do is push back.

Why?
This is the quiestion my world
Revolves around
Circling and spinning
Spirling
Why?

Do not try to remember the tales of how we met or ended
I was there when the fiery passion of our broken souls burned the city to ashes
you will always try to find your way back to me, in old dusty books,
in the signs on the street, in our songs that seem so lost to me now.
You were like a mirage in disguise, alarmingly enlightening.
I am spirling in a maze, a labyrinth, I'm getting dizzy going round and round through the same old thing.
I remain still not wanting to remember the feeling, of being with you