I
I wanted to walk with you,
Talk with you,
But your no longer,
Now I’m no longer too,
And there is nothing that you can do.
I’m not sure what I did,
As we floated amid this lonely cosmos,
I wish I could tell you that,
But you’re gone and I am too,
You destroyed me,
And showed no emotion.
You took my heart,
And threw it to the ground,
In the end you brought on madness,
You took away my sound.
I was a piano,
But you played my strings until they broke,
Then you tried to blame it on me.
Now i’m broken,
I’m worthless to you,
You played me,
Pounded on my keys,
Snapped my strings in half,
Snapped them with ease.
Thinking each broken string was painless,
But I felt immeasurable pain every time.
You think I’m an equation,
Just some math problem,
That you can apply your formulas to and solve,
But that doesn't work,
It just causes more hurt,
To you I am now worthless,
Empty and devoid of happiness,
And my sound?
It’s entirely gone.
To everyone,
But especially to you,
The one who matters most.
I was a piano full of joy, music and soul.
I used to capture memories,
Of emotion,
Of people,
Of the real world.
They cascaded out of photo albums,
Like rain pouring from a roof,
I do no longer.
But last and most importantly,
I used to get to talk with you,
To share my stories with someone else,
I will no longer.
See, what you don’t understand is,
You were my True North,
You saved me from myself,
In the end you saved me from nothing,
Why did you have to yell?
The thing that once saved me,
Turned me down,
Threw me out,
Shoved me into hell.
During my hardest times you stuck with me,
You were there through all the pain,
You were my inspiration,
My reason for doing what I do.
Your love wound up becoming,
The thing I wanted to gain.
But things did not last,
You threw me out like I was trash.
Now You are Halley’s Comet,
And I am the ******* Earth,
You come close every 76 years,
Close enough to elicit feelings,
Right before you disappear,
Shooting into the cosmos,
To not be seen again.
Ripping them right from under me,
Somehow I must have sinned.
If you would have asked me last year,
What my reason for truly living was,
I would’ve had an answer to give.
But I don’t have an answer,
the only reason I can find,
Is that I fear blandness.
I’m not scared of death,
But I fear when the day will come,
Maybe if I could give you a good answer,
You’d stop examining me,
Like the Hubble Telescope.
You look me up and down,
Trying to find my secrets,
To solve my mystery.
But I don’t wanna be solved,
I hide myself away,
But you don’t even care,
You never stop looking.
Even when I'm gone,
The laughter turns to sorrow,
The tears rise to a flood.
You think there's something wrong with me,
I'm just misunderstood.
You act like I’m a poem,
That you can analyze to find the truth,
That you can read my stanzas,
And deduce a hidden truth.
But I am a human being,
You've never looked at me like one,
Stop trying to figure me out,
This wars not one you've won.
It’s my fight not yours,
Stop trying to put yourself on the front line.
It’s the 14th round
And I may be losing,
But that doesn’t mean I’ve lost.
I’m fighting hard,
I’m trying to stay true,
I’m trying to keep it together,
And for some reason,
I'm doing it for you.
I was played just like music.
I'm stuck on loop,
I'll never stop,
Destined to remember the memories,
To repeat the same mistakes,
Some might call it madness,
Some might call it fate.
I am forever changing,
Woven through music itself.
II
We float around the cosmos,
Causing quite a fuss,
Rushing through the universe,
With a fear of getting lost.
The one thing we truly desire,
Is us.
Another human being,
Who can take away the pain,
And maybe just say that everything’s okay,
To leave us with the feeling,
There is not much left to gain.
But only when the pain is gone,
Do we realize disconsolate,
That we need the pain,
It’s crucial,
To our survival.
I spent my time in the light,
I took advantage of it,
I let it go to my head,
In the end it was my ignorance,
That caused me to stop living.
Humans are fragile,
Just like violins.
And like them,
We are made of strings,
Every time someone pulls on them,
Our emotions change.
But sometimes these strings break,
By someone who doesn’t care,
They leave us trying to play,
With our Bow-hair.
And when we finally realize,
Why we can’t make sound,
It is already too late,
Our string is underground,
One less emotion to feel,
And yet we still go on.
It causes us to feel sombrous,
The light is truly gone.
Just like my feelings,
Devoid of light,
Happiness.
But just like before,
I can see the light again,
I’m heading toward it,
Getting closer each day,
But am I doomed to chase it perennially?
Just like the subway train,
Always running,
Chasing vivaciously,
Towards a destination.
But never reaching a final one,
Until it’s decommissioned,
Consigned to oblivion.
All because it chases weakly,
Grasping for something out of reach.
Life is about the journey,
The destination doesn’t matter.
But sometimes,
The destination carries much more power,
It’s better than the journey,
It’s something truly ours.
III
We all flow freely,
From destination to destination,
Never stopping,
Only feeling fernweh about the next place.
But only by stopping to look back,
Reflect on ourselves,
On our journey,
Do we realize the magnificent desolation.
Most of us miss this feeling,
Not even knowing it exists.
But this magnificent desolation,
Is the only thing that matters,
It seems so clean and familiar,
Almost like spring flowers,
It holds much more meaning,
A meaning dear to your heart,
It’s something that’s only yours.
And once you find it hold on tight,
Because just as the darkness turned into light,
It can easily turn back.
I’ve witnessed it firsthand,
I’m victim to its restless hand.
It makes me sit,
And wonder why,
Out of all the people in the world,
That they could have chosen,
They chose you.
They chose you.
To share their stories,
Their secrets,
Their entire life,
Or sometimes just the view.
They give you their Elan Vital,
Trusting you to choose,
To be safe with it,
To take care of it,
We don’t value people,
Until they're gone from our lives,
Then,
Only then,
Do we realize,
What we had with them,
By then we’re left broken,
Trying to pick up the pieces,
That are no longer there.
It leaves you with depression,
A feeling of worthlessness,
Nothing seems to help,
It’s quite a hit or miss.
You have to fight it yourself,
Maybe you’ll get lucky,
Maybe you'll find someone else,
Maybe they’ll be funny.
That’s what happened with me,
I found a friend in unlikely places,
A friend who made me feel safe,
Someone there for me,
During my darkest time.
They stuck with me,
Through everything,
They are here in every way,,
They showed me good in people,
They’re the brightness of my day.
Yes they have their problems,
We all do deep down,
They go through pain themselves,
It’s hard to keep them down.
But the simple act of trying,
Is the thing that stops your hell.
They bring you back,
Through their own good doing,
They mentor you to health,
They even might just become,
The single one in the world,
That makes you feel at home.
Eventually the sadness became happiness,
It bloomed like spring flowers,
My joyous tune finally matched with someone,
Through Summer's gone and winter's come,
Woven together throughout the universe,
This feelings worth far more than gold,
Far more than anything other,
For what we have is something special,
I hope it goes on forever.
Time goes on,
It never stops,
My feelings mend together,
Yet for some reason,
You seem to be ingrained in my mind forever,
I find myself thinking about you,
Time and time again,
You became entwined in who I am.
I know I ****** things up,
I always do,
Someway or another.
God, I’d give anything for just one more summer,
Just to feel that happiness.
I thought we would stay friends forever,
But you left me weak and vulnerable,
You took my heart and threw it away,
Only for the hell of it.
I’m finally ready to let go,
To forget the pain and sadness,
To remember the memories that I do have,
The ones that were good,
The ones that made me happy,
The ones I understood.
I’ve waited for this moment for so long,
To finally have my demons be gone.
I never thought I’d reach this moment,
Finally being ok,
Being at peace with my feelings.
It’s been so long,
The feeling is so unfamiliar now,
I welcome it.
It’s finally time,
My finals words before you go,
Have a good morning, good evening, and goodnight.
Thank you for the show
