"resurging" poems - Hello Poetry

I have walked this earth a thousand times. Dirt. A loose aggregate of particles, held together by gravity, and moisture. Rain. Water suspended. Resurging. Cascading in plumes, like sheets of smoke. Sky. Blue. Stretched like canvas. Abstract. Nowhere. Everywhere. I exist. Here. Standing. Thinking. I am dead. I am being born. I am existing across all time and space, but I do not know it. At this moment, I am trapped. I am unconscious. I am unaware. I have walked this earth a thousand times, and cannot even remember. Because it has not happened. Has yet to happen. May never happen. Future. A nonexistence on the horizon. Hope. An ache. A nothing replaced with nothing. Misery. The wretched face in the mirror. A child wears my eyes. She drifts through life. Scared. Alone. Free. She plays in the forest. Her small, sap-covered hands grasp branch after branch. She enters intermediate school. Is called freak. Is judged by her skin, her eyes. She realises she is different for the first time. Alien. Deviant. Other. Her eyes fill with self-hatred. I have watched this moment a thousand times, yet can do nothing. Disintegration. The act of separation. Loneliness. A billion strangers condemned to live together. Existence. A billion billion billion particles, shifting beneath my flesh. There is no death that can end my being. I have felt the atoms of my past collide, and spark into biology. I have felt the atoms of my future shred like fractals, spiralling into a dim, dark nothingness. I have felt all this, and none of it. From infinity I came, to infinity I’ll go. Forever cycling in the pantomime of existence. This pretend construct of space and time.

0

Oct 20, 2015

Oct 20, 2015 at 8:45 AM UTC

mitakiharashi

Recurrence

I have walked this earth a thousand times. Dirt. A loose aggregate of particles, held together by gravity, and moisture. Rain. Water suspended. Resurging. Cascading in plumes, like sheets of smoke. Sky. Blue. Stretched like canvas. Abstract. Nowhere. Everywhere. I exist. Here. Standing. Thinking. I am dead. I am being born. I am existing across all time and space, but I do not know it. At this moment, I am trapped. I am unconscious. I am unaware. I have walked this earth a thousand times, and cannot even remember. Because it has not happened. Has yet to happen. May never happen. Future. A nonexistence on the horizon. Hope. An ache. A nothing replaced with nothing. Misery. The wretched face in the mirror. A child wears my eyes. She drifts through life. Scared. Alone. Free. She plays in the forest. Her small, sap-covered hands grasp branch after branch. She enters intermediate school. Is called freak. Is judged by her skin, her eyes. She realises she is different for the first time. Alien. Deviant. Other. Her eyes fill with self-hatred. I have watched this moment a thousand times, yet can do nothing. Disintegration. The act of separation. Loneliness. A billion strangers condemned to live together. Existence. A billion billion billion particles, shifting beneath my flesh. There is no death that can end my being. I have felt the atoms of my past collide, and spark into biology. I have felt the atoms of my future shred like fractals, spiralling into a dim, dark nothingness. I have felt all this, and none of it. From infinity I came, to infinity I’ll go. Forever cycling in the pantomime of existence. This pretend construct of space and time.

30

*O opium's opposite, A great wall Of spine, A Yin and Yang Of tongues, We tug and pull At territories, Acupuncture, Our souls Populous Of me and her, As our energies, powers, Superpowers, stirring, Growing, binging, Surging, and resurging, Engulf A blazing evening.* © 2015 J.S.P.

0

Nov 6, 2015

Nov 6, 2015 at 9:15 PM UTC

jspua

Chinadoll

*O opium's opposite, A great wall Of spine, A Yin and Yang Of tongues, We tug and pull At territories, Acupuncture, Our souls Populous Of me and her, As our energies, powers, Superpowers, stirring, Growing, binging, Surging, and resurging, Engulf A blazing evening.* © 2015 J.S.P.

18

waiting watching seeking in vain anxious eager expecting in vain unrelenting mind thinking in vain hopeful aspiring dreaming in vain golden memories resurging in vain gazing searching reaching in vain lonely aimless existing in vain painful destined sojourn in vain hoping moments solace in vain wishful hoping a glimpse in vain desiring deeply belonging in vain closely warmly approaching in vain missing pining crying in vain A dawn to come, this pain no more in vain

0

Mar 27, 2019

Mar 27, 2019 at 10:29 PM UTC

shibu-varkey

Waiting

waiting watching seeking in vain anxious eager expecting in vain unrelenting mind thinking in vain hopeful aspiring dreaming in vain golden memories resurging in vain gazing searching reaching in vain lonely aimless existing in vain painful destined sojourn in vain hoping moments solace in vain wishful hoping a glimpse in vain desiring deeply belonging in vain closely warmly approaching in vain missing pining crying in vain A dawn to come, this pain no more in vain

28

my face burns a flame of emotion across a clouded sky my insides swell and heave a ship rocks from the tidal waves i lose my footing, or did i jump? Why did I do this? I already know the answer. -silence- the air ripples my clothes i fall for hours crash. the ocean. i remember the feeling. it's cold; i am solid i cannot move water is in my lungs the salt stings my eyes. there is nothing for miles only i exist here It isn't enough. Most life in the ocean isn't this high up. i let out the remaining air in my lungs, and i begin to sink. I see you. Watching me. we both relive our pain. the stinging of the box jellyfish. the pierce of an octopus beak. it hurts. I see our blood color the water. The tears in our eyes, or is it the brine? You say something. I couldn't hear it. I have to keep sinking. I have to find you, see you, Ask you. I pull us both down. your stinging stops, for one moment. the jellyfish and the octopus. is it an embrace? is it a struggle? I hold our memories, cradled in 8 arms. I feel your fear. I see my mistake. jetting upward, I force myself up. upward in the roiling ocean. Why did I do this to you? What can I do to fix it? the octopus pulls it pulls it pulls it's arms off. it can't look at itself not with these arms not with these eyes. Looking back now, I really didn't see her. I promised my heart to her, and I only gave half. he stops moving. floating motionless. the jellyfish has drifted away. he watches in silence. she has painted new pictures. he closes his eyes and thinks of what he's done. the months pass he meets the other fish in the sea. he wastes his time. on them. on his hobbies. on working. each night he sees her in a dream, but by morning he says it's washed away. I can't blame her. I wasn't there. september. he feels himself climbing up the side of the trawler. Maybe I can stay alone. By myself. Maybe I really am the devil of the ocean, and only god can redeem me. he argues with his friends "You still miss her, don't you?" is what they ask. he hesitates. he feels the love resurging. I am different. This time it is different. he wakes up early and works out. he takes on another job. he resists the pull of the sea. he thinks of the jellyfish and his wrongs. he wants to share his unbridled love. I'll look. Just one more time. the waves, they're back the sky is gloomy and it rains for days. he wants to dive again. back down to her. he knows his mistakes and remembers hers. but it'll be different. the ocean looks the same.

0

Sep 11, 2018

Sep 11, 2018 at 9:43 AM UTC

doll-spaghetti

oceans of regret

my face burns a flame of emotion across a clouded sky my insides swell and heave a ship rocks from the tidal waves i lose my footing, or did i jump? Why did I do this? I already know the answer. -silence- the air ripples my clothes i fall for hours crash. the ocean. i remember the feeling. it's cold; i am solid i cannot move water is in my lungs the salt stings my eyes. there is nothing for miles only i exist here It isn't enough. Most life in the ocean isn't this high up. i let out the remaining air in my lungs, and i begin to sink. I see you. Watching me. we both relive our pain. the stinging of the box jellyfish. the pierce of an octopus beak. it hurts. I see our blood color the water. The tears in our eyes, or is it the brine? You say something. I couldn't hear it. I have to keep sinking. I have to find you, see you, Ask you. I pull us both down. your stinging stops, for one moment. the jellyfish and the octopus. is it an embrace? is it a struggle? I hold our memories, cradled in 8 arms. I feel your fear. I see my mistake. jetting upward, I force myself up. upward in the roiling ocean. Why did I do this to you? What can I do to fix it? the octopus pulls it pulls it pulls it's arms off. it can't look at itself not with these arms not with these eyes. Looking back now, I really didn't see her. I promised my heart to her, and I only gave half. he stops moving. floating motionless. the jellyfish has drifted away. he watches in silence. she has painted new pictures. he closes his eyes and thinks of what he's done. the months pass he meets the other fish in the sea. he wastes his time. on them. on his hobbies. on working. each night he sees her in a dream, but by morning he says it's washed away. I can't blame her. I wasn't there. september. he feels himself climbing up the side of the trawler. Maybe I can stay alone. By myself. Maybe I really am the devil of the ocean, and only god can redeem me. he argues with his friends "You still miss her, don't you?" is what they ask. he hesitates. he feels the love resurging. I am different. This time it is different. he wakes up early and works out. he takes on another job. he resists the pull of the sea. he thinks of the jellyfish and his wrongs. he wants to share his unbridled love. I'll look. Just one more time. the waves, they're back the sky is gloomy and it rains for days. he wants to dive again. back down to her. he knows his mistakes and remembers hers. but it'll be different. the ocean looks the same.

93

I cried tonight. I cried as I listened to two believers tell me my dreams are still possible. Tell us all our dreams are still possible. I cried as they told me what I already knew. How possibility to grant gravity to our progress as a people was unjustly ripped from us almost four years ago. Ripped from me. I cried four years ago as well. Different tears. Very different. I cried as I felt my chest fill once again with a breath I haven't drawn in a long time. A breath of freedom. A breath of hope. My lungs expanded as tears welled and my throat caught. I cried as I heard words of processed thought and genuine care. Ideas of resurging justice and critical vision. I cried as I watched inspired people inspire me. People of service. True service. Serving me, serving us. I cried cheer and joy. Of illumination. Enlightenment. I cried as my ears became filled with complete and coherent sentences. Sentences of reason. Reason and truth. I cried for the tortured eagle in all of us. Carelessly beaten. Recklessly injured. But surviving and resilient. I heard that bird's cry. Knowing how high it can fly once again. Higher. I cried with tears of promise. Promise of the next. Promise of the after. Soon. I cried happy tears hoping for an end to our nightmare. And I slept like a baby. A baby eagle...

0

Aug 20, 2020

Aug 20, 2020 at 12:00 PM UTC

gotime49

I Cried Tonight

I cried tonight. I cried as I listened to two believers tell me my dreams are still possible. Tell us all our dreams are still possible. I cried as they told me what I already knew. How possibility to grant gravity to our progress as a people was unjustly ripped from us almost four years ago. Ripped from me. I cried four years ago as well. Different tears. Very different. I cried as I felt my chest fill once again with a breath I haven't drawn in a long time. A breath of freedom. A breath of hope. My lungs expanded as tears welled and my throat caught. I cried as I heard words of processed thought and genuine care. Ideas of resurging justice and critical vision. I cried as I watched inspired people inspire me. People of service. True service. Serving me, serving us. I cried cheer and joy. Of illumination. Enlightenment. I cried as my ears became filled with complete and coherent sentences. Sentences of reason. Reason and truth. I cried for the tortured eagle in all of us. Carelessly beaten. Recklessly injured. But surviving and resilient. I heard that bird's cry. Knowing how high it can fly once again. Higher. I cried with tears of promise. Promise of the next. Promise of the after. Soon. I cried happy tears hoping for an end to our nightmare. And I slept like a baby. A baby eagle...

39