Once a cheater always a cheater
That’s what I have always heard
Some say its absurd
Some say that’s only true with repeaters
So what are you?
A repeater?
Or just a one time cheater?
What should I do?
You have proved you’re untrustworthy
But can I trust you ever again?
You’re stuck in my brain
But thinking like this isn’t healthy
I love you
But you lied to me
My brain says to flea
I am afraid my heart will not pull through

personification and retreat
I am here like I am here
like I am or have been here
overridden and steadfast
folded like wideswept domains
I broke walls I count splinters I pack light and swing heels I am broken most of the time and I kind of like it
it’s easy to construct
socket set memories
a forest of meaning sprouting up defining swan songs
and their resonant structures
crawl down the valley all sweet and serene

Ballerina stance leaner
porcelain poised demeanor
lined up for a chance at that old 500 gram repeater.
Yeah, a little firecracker,
a little fire eater.
Twiggy figure, ****** fire dome where her little wires teeter.
Excellent muse material
my ***** optics viewed ethereal
Beauty, and she knew it.
Arrogance.
Noted, duly.
Pittsburgh's resident fire ant, with a grace to match her face
And a whole crew of troglodytes racing to get a taste
So thanks Angela Chase;
I prefer the fantasy too.
And thanks to you my chickens won't be sleeping easy in their coup.
Loop Jabberwocky with Calligraphy
and dabbled in polygamy. purpose:
****** cyst bubbles to the surface.
Misinterpret the tongue touching and hand clutching,
you were baby girlie thumb-*******
But thought more than twice about it when it came to dumb-*******.
Pretty face: check
Depression: not yet
Appreciating phonemes, but still a nervous wreck
false carrot tops to bed, awkward with the ***** work.
Near waif redhead. Pittsburgh Boys. the city lurks
It's been a minute since the girl scouts got at me, I bought it.
Hop in the DeLorean tell Lauren that I'm off it.

Sitting in white shirt
(Loosened yuppie Windsor knot)
Armchair laughing
Having realized the grand joke of life

Satisfied little Sanskrit honey
Is it a bohdi tree or burning bush
(When really are one and same)
Don't think too hard

Suburban white boy dreams of trap houses
With tie over shoulder
As the tv says it prevents
***** on tie

Little air planes
Round and white
Hard pressed (to explain)
Make one fly at high speed
Get it? (never mind inside joke laughing)

Talks like a gang banger
Can't take it seriously
Little big boy equals not shook
Drinking rot gut tallboys

Days after and minutes away
Zehaf-Bibeau war memorial
Winchester repeater in hand
Supposed ideological threat needed
Expand the police state

she was a wireless broadcast
that was when i was a receiver
now i'm pickin up zilch,
she's not a long repeater

How can I expect thoughtfulness from one who doesn't feel ?
I cringe at your definition of friendship
I know you don't know how to be
While you trample on sacred ground
with a head full of high I's
I see you've never known love
I see the writing on the wall
a play not written by you
Repeater of those vanished voices
Ashes at what once was alive
Resentment passes landing on your doorstep
Careful trotting on rotten floor boards
To lose yourself in dream killing doors
Excuses will not fill the void
Stumble around in a cloud
Clenched teeth
Hurting
Hoping in mirrors and ghosts for salvation
You're living a lie... time is tick ...ticking by

I have learned, years ago, to work quite hard to make the proper changes in myself.
I may not be the greatest at my trade
The handsomest of Faces
However, I believe I have worked quite well for what I am.
An equal seller on Life's Library Book Shelf.
I might have been a lose and broken man before.
Not this time.
I've broken the circle of being the "repeater" and I have blossomed once more.
I change for the better of my own life becoming brighter.
To repay kindness of those who always believed in the real me.
People who never hung on to what "Bad" I used to bring onto the table.
A more delicious and brighter dinner for those who have supported
and have clearly waited for me to set myself free.
Free from worries about who shall accept me or what status quota I shall fit ,amusing.
Myself as an actor portraying some one other than who I truly am.
A comedian  who brought down  his own house of cards  by becoming the laughing stock
of the Drunken Clowns.
I rose up upon life's stages and became a truer actor.
One who is the truer artist by appreciating those who enjoyed his "Newest of Magic tricks."
"****!" I metamorphosed into a dove.
I fly away,now, to a glowing life which fits me
like a hand in a glove.

Sometimes,
we pick the scabs
of old scars,
pushdown
on the brown
and bluish bruise
that brands us
just to get in touch
with what
made us
who we are.

Sometimes,
we go too far
or stop just short of
where we were sort of
supposed to go
to show those who know
similar scars.

Sometimes,
we break ourselves,
crack our backs
on a torture rack
that we brought back
from the dirt an ash
of burnt out sorrows.

Why,
behave that way,
shaving days of pain
away
just to bring them
back in again?

I cannot say for certain.
I am only working
with what I got,
cutting the edges
taking bets on
what I lost
in exchange for
the chance to be
a boon to humanity,
king soother
with a little blasphemy,
witty repeater
of past artistry
as I string together
the broken chords
that still tether
struggling hearts
to the similar parts
of each other.

The author of poetry from original ideas;
the author of poetry from secondhand ideas;
the repeater of poetry (communicating meaning);
the speaker of poetry off-the-top of the head
(due to great understanding).

~From the Pali Canon

Life is a boring repeater
a very poor story-teller

Look, we don't know.
None of us do.
It's all a good show,
pretending to.

It's a healthy dose
of doubting,
wealthy closed
off pouting, sitting,
thinking, ruminating
until it all gets through
and it luminates you too.

It's every day, another
cycle, new problems bother.
Life as a whole over time
and over goal.

Just say, another spin is coming,
another ship is landing,
another first couple of steps
in this ever expanding
repeater of the same.

Just say, we can take another go,
make another climb, dangerous or lame.
Because when we say we can,
it helps us all stay sane.