Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm asleep or awake,

My dreams are real and reality is fake.

What I think is real might be wrong,

Perhaps I've been deceived all along.

Maybe I'll wake up if this is a dream,

And realize that nothing is how it once seemed.

There are times when I just feel-

Like nothing in my life is real.

Perhaps I'll wake up after I die-

And see that my whole life was a lie.

Maybe not even reality is real,

Sometimes it seems abstract and surreal.

My life is terrible, too awful to be true,

So can it be real? I wish I knew.

This surreal life I can't escape,

What if I'm not even awake?

My whole life could be a dream,

Trapped in my mind, reality unseen.

If my life is a dream, don't wake me yet.

I want to live a life I'll never forget.

From name to name I tried to fit what would please you,
From "Skia" to "Luchesi" to ones like "Paradeaux".
Over and over I tried to find an image that would keep me from pain,
To my misfortune you only used it for personal gain.

I have come to the point of duality,
An awful state of mentality,
Where freedom is lost not just in body,
But mind and life;
To cause sickness, fear,
Frustration, insanity
and ongoing strife.

What is my name? Do I really even know?
Who was I before I became a prisoner of control?
Everyone has grown hatred wanting to call justice,
But you see I understand now-that is why I instead call unto forgiveness.

Never hold onto hatred no matter what you've lost, not even the amount of fear, damage and pain-
Not even when you have lost your very own name.

❥