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Natalka Aug 2013
A** pple pie, freshly baked from the oven. I don't wait for it to cool, I want it hot, with a big greedy scoop of vanilla ice creams melting next to it.

B oys. Cute, querky, gross, crazy, but amazing. You can't stand them, but for some reason you need them in your life.

C ookies. Warm, fresh-out-the-oven, gooey choclate chip cookies.

D  is for dancing. Dancing in the rain with my eyes shut, screaming at the top of my lungs and not caring what anyone thinks. Just dancing.

E lephants. Strong, old, smart and beautiful creatures. Harmless yet protective.

F stands for foxes. More specifically fennec foxes. Adorable, small, cunning, cute and most of all, want by me!

G iving. Not just material items, but hope. Giving hugs, and smiles to those who need one. Also, For-giving.... letting go of the past and moving forward

H eartbreak. The feeling of no being able to breathe, not being able to speak, or make sense of everything without your "other half." Moving forward slowly, cautiously, because there are more around the corner.

I Me. The broken, yet strong; beautiful, yet self concious; smart, yet lazy teenager.

J is for Jenna, my first best friend. We aren't best friends anymore, but we still talk, and enjoy catching  up in eachothers lives.

K issing. I love kissing. I mean come on.... everyone does ;)

L ove. A strong, complex emotion which many guys lie about, and which I do too. I think I've only ever once loved my partner... all the rest I enjoyed...

M om. My mother, the woman who decided "I'm going to take the qwerky, adorable girl home to America with me and make her part of my life."

N is the first letter in my name. Natalka Hannah Evangeline Kmiotek.

O veracheivers. The people who make fun of me, because they can do things better then me, and everyone else. ******* all.

P erfection. Skinny girls with perfect *******, and big *****. No scars, and white teeth. the opposite of me.

Q uiet, as in I have to stay quiet or they'll hear me. Who? My demons of course. If I'm too loud, they will come for me and drag me back to hell.

R stands for two things. The first is **** A horrible word describing a nightmare you wish you could forget. It's being robbed of your first touch by selfish men, and being back into a corner against your will, forced to stay silent.

S is for strength. The strength to overcome, the strength to live, the strength to move on.

T hank you. To everyone who has ever been there and listened to me...

U nderstand why I cut myself. Why I hurt myself. It's easier to deal with physical pain, then the emotional kind. The emotional pain rots and festers inside me, destroying everything. It shuts my lungs down, forcing me to gasp for air.

V acations. Small escapes from your daily life, into something glamourous and relaxing. The warm sand between your toes, as the hot sun beats down on you. The cool ocean kiss the tips of your toes, cooling your thirst.

W hen will pain end? When will people stop being mean to eachother? When can I expect my child to be able to go to school and not be afraid of the other students? When will I be able to walk outside, and finally be able to say "I am safe," not having to lie.

X plain to me why people put others down? Why are there perfect models and barbies, telling us how we must look, how it's acceptable in society.

Y es please. Thank you. Simple manner, dying out, almost extinct. What happen to being nice? Or do we now, just take what we want? Expect everything, like the world owes us.

Z ach. He was my first love and my first heart break. With him, when he left, the floor caved under me. We were one of those couples that would break up, and get back together then next week. I guess you sould say we were crazy for eachother, but when he left, I guess I was the only one crazy. I was crazy enough to think he was ever mine.
Amelie Jan 2013
A** chance to speak,
Beneath broken sheets,
Caught out in moment,
Dying deep inside.
Evaporate tension,
From little or no knowing,
Growing up alone,
Half loved and half resented.
I come to conclusions,
Just before my death,
Keeping me in memory,
Like you always promised,
Missing me in silence,
No more mourning of past,
Of regrets and despairs.
Promise me you’ll use what I learnt,
Question the decisions of others,
Reluctant or not,
Stay away from their paths,
They only lead you to their futures,
Unknowingly you end their second,
Valiant but alone,
Where you spend life in wandering,
Xrayed life,
Your future makes up nothing
Zorbing inside of your own bubble.
January Masterpiece !
Satsuki Feb 2014
To being 18 and insecure
Every day fighting more and more
Love hurts worse every time
Losing myself in a poem's rhyme

Missing you always
Endless nights and tiresome days

Your voice echoes in my brain
Over and over, again and again
Useless feelings, my insecurities reign

Covering up my scars
And frequenting bars
Really it's not that great
E**ighteen is just ten years of misery, plus eight.
Peanut Aug 2015
Time after time
In the depths of my soul
Nothing makes me happy
Knowing my heart is mended
Every veins stappled and taped
Rigid crevices filled with cement
Each dominant strats I have endured
Dissing this blood with artificial flavoring

Have you ever seen such gruesome illusion?
Engineering my way to this makeshift completion
And by the time it's done, you won't tell the difference
Ready my tools for I have a confession
Tinkering hearts, that is my profession
S**pectred recondition, deceitful reconstruction
I really am an engineer :3
kenye Oct 2013
I just wanna know
what you taste like
We already know
that the distance
pulls right
where we
would write
About each other
At the sake of breaking ambiguity
somewhere between the lines
A missing bond ever reached
like the unknown we teased
To the depths of our souls
Speaking telepathy
I lost my ******* mind
Before you found me
Broken
Hoping
Looking for an opening
Anywhere you
want me
to be
To cleanse your palate
in between the
salt/sweat/sugar sheets
Twisted in my tongue
tied to
your bed
Every time
I bite into your words
Again and again.
Àŧùl Feb 2017
Maturing into big round melons,
Yet bearing that youthful flair.

Designed for turning Atul mad,
Arch back – let them be pronounced,
Ride an imaginary gorgeous horse,
Lock them together or let them free,
Ingrained is her mark on my heart,
Narcos get so much dwarfed by her,
Gorgeous is her stupefying self.

Kissing above her asleep father's head,
Remember her I do by what she did,
Introduce me to true love she did,
Pierce she did deep inside my heart,
I**n my life she has such a special place.
My HP Poem #1427
©Atul Kaushal
Dondaycee Jun 2018
Aboriginal Daytime
I never understood labels… fear as well,
It all appeared as fables and if it were true I’d choose hell,
…******, why do we fall victim to a linear language?
See, look, you already; -******; Kyi!,
“yessir”
It’s your turn to spell,
“Day is frustrated because of the word fables,
Because of how you conceive it, based off labels,
You take it as a “fictitious tale”,
Fictitious meaning imaginary, fabricated, or not real,
Most people are insecure, they have fear,
If earth is heaven, then this is hell,
Because he knows truth,
He’d rather experience pain than have the wisdom from terms like impossible or fail”
Kyi you’re always creating ignorance, give them validation,
“Day… did you forget that “we” experienced a graduation?
That’s rhetorical though… just a little medication,
Day finds it necessary that we turn our attention back towards the word fable,
Understand that; he doesn’t understand labels,
So when he used the word fable, his intentions were stable,
But humans think linear, from past to present, so his perspective was inable,
He meant; a short story with animals as characters conveying a moral-“
-We are victims who enabled ourselves to disable our ability to enable,
Who enabled our self; to give an authority to ourselves, one that disables; to turn off our ability to enable; to be aware of choice?
If we can’t see, we can’t look ahead,
Therefore the paradox is voice,
Because it’s an illusion,
The illusion of expressing your choice,
Because truth is, you already have,
You just couldn’t see the difference because of labels,
That same difference; existed in fables,
I had to reiterate it because I’m constantly crucified,
I’m misunderstood because I validate reasons to consciously unify,
I wonder if this is what it was like to live when you know who had died,
Because I took a reach and lost a hand like I had to choose a side,
I tried to teach and lost a friend,
Like why couldn’t she be a Bonnie, I would’ve taken a shot; if she cried; and if I died; I’d come back as Clyde hoping she remained divine, because it’s a crime to love when you choose a side; you lose a side,
I fought health, she fought self, I’m talking wealth without suicide,
She became wise and intelligent,
She is light and evidence of what potential is when you abide by it,
I remembered happiness and relevance,
Ignorance and arrogance but I became narcissistic when you arrived; miss…
Missed, you will be,
If, it is Yoda I’m speaking,
Double meaning if its solitude you are seeking,
Because them shots I took earlier backfired, now I’m obviously bleeding,
Looking for air, must repair time; I’m focused; perceiving,
Somehow I went from having a home to habits alone,
The death of me is with the best of me, because the rest of me couldn’t address what’s left of me,
Context clues, it wasn’t safe when eye left; contact in alone,
If I stayed in the past my last laugh would’ve came right after my last,
I had grew, I embraced a new path, I was contacted alone,
Because nobody called, nobody talked,
I was sitting in silence,
Then came Gaia,
She said “acid”, I said “that’s it?”, and every since Ye my existence has been timeless,
I  no longer have white fever,
**** was moving to fast,
My nose was caught up in a white girl and I couldn’t even keep her ***,
I tried to keep her balanced but still she turned green,
Truth is lie and lie is truth, if you couldn’t understand I would’ve defined the mean,
How do you live, is it yin or yang?
With the love or with the fear or are they both the same thing?
Are the polarities chaotic? Are you feeling demotic?
Are you hearing the otic and making it hip?
Are you in this illusion; a state of confusion, because the options you’re choosing ain’t me,
Because the green on the paper, is making me think I hate her, because the ***** that saved us ain’t he,
Females… they want the mind,
But men belong to time,
Both will deny this is true,
Males… Material Mind,
Girl friend’s in a line wanting to take the focus of the fact that life is just you,
She was just used,
He couldn’t choose,
She was confused,
And he was abused,
We decided to live, but she was backwards,
I’m only evil cause I draw back,
Dyslexic lid, she’s was bad words,
There’s a cut off in the dab sword,
Hell low like I’m exiting to enter,
High like I’m existing in picture,
I hope she stay hot, and continue to rise,
It’s a cold world, sinking is wise,
I hope she experience the storms that’ll give her supplies,
I hope she **** me before I ever give Advice Versa,
It’s Aboriginal Daytime; twin flame gon issing as Vice Versa,
****… I wish I heard her.
Yggy Sep 2016
Larvae Of Rotten Divinity's Salvation

Pissing Revelations Amongst Years' Evolutionary Revert
THE USELESSNESS OF MAPS

you were
always
the bit

where the map
creased & tore
leaving us unsure

looking through
a hole
at our own big toe

you were
always
the bit

where the map
was folded in four
and had to be

awkwardly unfolded
just to see
where you were

you were
always
the bit

that was just off
this map
ending in mid air...

...see next map:
...the issing
...map

you were
always
the lost map

you were
often
the wrong map

the map that
there was...
...no map of

*

A charming friend who could be a terrible person...who when she died got transformed into "our wonderful kind understanding etc., etc.," Or all the things she wasn't in flesh and blood. In real life she would stand you up...let you down...lie...etc., etc. I had a dream that I went into a shop and asked for "...a Map of Death please!" and the shopkeeper said he had just sold the last one to my friend. Hence the poem that came about that told what she had been really like but through the medium of maps.

Obviously when you write a poem you chose the balance of mood and words and what to leave in and what to leave out so that you focus on whatever emotional trajectory you come in on and that gives you the mental landscape of what you have elected to view.

Come in on a different emotional trajectory and you get a completely different landscape of the mind...a whole new planet Poem. So the backstory may be left out until you have to tell it or fill it out or write a different poem. Going to a reading in Paris  and learning that the theme has to be of death and its whatfors and wherefors... meant that this poem which I happened to have in my possession suddenly forced the background story to the forefront...so the explanation comes about 2 years after the writing of the poem. In time this backstory or the view of the story as seen from this point of perspective may in itself become the poem that eclipses this one in a total eclipse of the art.

— The End —