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Dark Dream May 2021
Insecurity is covering me today
Vulnerable and lame
Hidden away for days of grandeur
Revealing words of failure
Taunting with moans left behind
Anxiety came as a unwanted guest
Pretending its residence
Taking pride in the destruction
Overriding it seems impossible
They show me all my desires
Laughable and unrealistic
Then it stokes the fire higher than before
Making me yearn exponentially
Grabbing for peace
Striving for acceptance
Yet thinking this ineptitude won’t end
Undeserving, unrequited, and unfulfilled
Elusive contentment has exhausted me
Weariness joins my covering
Maybe tomorrow I will rest
Dark Dream May 2021
I have a switch inside
Flips so quick
I feel **** and sensual
Beautiful and free
Then slam reversal
The creeps barge in
I’m disgusting and gross
Smelly and fat
The words said are true
“Who would want you?”

So I engage myself
Some kind of battle
A rampage of sorts
Argumentative debates
Parts taking sides
Remembering all the hurts
The feels and thrills
This is all I deserve
Those words that might be true
“What part is really you?”
Dark Dream May 2021
I hit the wall
Away from this
Mental frontage
Where is my
Fortitude
I dig
And I labor
For what
The same results?
No!
It changes
So slowly
Excruciating
But it’s there
Some movement
Days might
Trek back
I weep
And produce
Different
Tracks
Will it end?
Always asking
That question
Unknown future
Seems bleak
I need the
~ hope
A new spark-fire
Resuscitate
Rejuvenate
A tiny ember
To begin again
Dark Dream May 2021
If they knew how truly sad I was

Would they still like me?

If they saw my darkness

Would they run away scared?

If they knew all my morbid thoughts

Would they think I’m crazy?

If they found out my twisted desires

Would they still want me?

If they saw my underbelly

Would they leave?

If they saw all my scars

Would they stay?
Dark Dream May 2021
Hoping for words
No ... tired of those

Needing the ship
Sailing into the ache
Erasing the lonely winds
Not sure why
I yearn for that bow front
Heading toward me

Yet I do
I wait
For the winds of change
Or for a new sail
Maybe tomorrow
That ship will
Land on my shore
Dark Dream May 2021
I tried
I tried with you
I was a mess but I tried
I gave you a piece of me and
I tried to give you more
I tried to make it work
I tried for you
I tried for us
I tried
Dark Dream May 2021
Slide into me
Tight rigid flesh
Aching breaths hitting
Pulsing lips riding
Crimson cheeks
Lingering wet fingertips
Flayed and primitive
Grazing the surface
Ritual essence denied
Deeper base of purity
Carnal frames clutching
Erupting into form and shape
Becoming essential and visceral
Instinctive undulating
Reaching the orogeny
Cresting over solid embrace
Luscious tumbles
Twisting skin
I slip in you
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