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Zhavaed Haemaed May 2020
I am damaged goods
A corruption of heart
Up from abyssal depths,
Down to desolate clouds.
The fragment lying between
I am not the incessant air,
A rage of non awakening.
Culmination of all fears.
No words do then, describe
me; I do not conform to rules.
Exception I am; ambiguous
A regular consonantal fool ?
Decreed to consume it all
I carry a ravenous thirst.
Unchecked; I grow fervor
A demon, I am accursed.
Where, then, do I find home
Where does my soul belong ?
Whom shall I call my tribe
Then; what do I, thus long ?
I am damaged goods, get ye'
I do not conform to codes.
I belong to the nether realm
Let me lie, in my .. abode.
Do not then, exhume me,
I have chosen to slither in. And,
Lie dormant in the underground.
Where exist I may, in quiet
Lie hidden away, from the
carnal realm, I want none of it.
A monster of my own making,
A necromancer of the Undead.
An ode to both Dostoevsky and Lovecraft. I tried describing the existential pain of being in a world where you understand too much and thus are left, disappointed in everything, people.
Zhavaed Haemaed May 2020
I preached him
To ask the tough
Questions

But who will
Ask them
For me?

My Jasmine thoughts
For you, are
Withering dry

They see nought
But an arid dead sea
Zhavaed Haemaed May 2020
The Price of Sanctity

Hazy.. blind, I can't see a thing,
Sweat; an ocean__and I drown.
Trickling, feel rivers down my spine
Scorched, an all too normal tryst.
Elements, lost; wasted in the heat,
An itch; how quitely it goes ignored.
This headache. **** this headache
Someone get me a salve.
2 hours !
Twice has the clock ran by,
5 more, er..
But, can I last any long ?
Water ! No water ! No fluid
Traverses in to / without _
Hell ? No, it is dead men walking.
Heaven ? Has there ever any been?
Natural, welcome to the new order.
Living, shall never be any the same.
Working in a CoViD 19 ward. Inside the PPE. These thoughts came to mind as I jotted them down.
Zhavaed Haemaed May 2020
The heart knows                when it knows

Follow the fluttering butterfly inside you,

Always.
Zhavaed Haemaed May 2020
Don't
hold back
your love,
let it rain.
Advise to someone in love
Zhavaed Haemaed May 2020
Don't live in hope for a better future. The better future we hope for is a farce. Live now, love now, love fiercely. Make each moment count.
Advice to a friend in love
Zhavaed Haemaed May 2020
Only in the darkest of times,
does the light shine most bright.
Only upon heathen lands, do flowers bloom most pretty ..
For if it was not for the dark, we would not have known light_ and if we were not witness to such droughts, would we ever sing rain songs ?
A tree blossoms in spring, because it had withered away, in its winter.
The water from the rain skies flow as answer to those repugnant summers. As you grow older, so you see the beauty in pain .. and as it makes you wiser, you do not see anything, ever the same..
Life is not distasteful, if you have a wider eye .. be observant, my child, be marvelously alive ..
And this and nothing else, would have been thy calling, and this and nothing else would be meaning to your being !
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