they say love is the driving force of the artist

the words that spill upon the page are inspired by the butterflies in their belly

the stars in their eyes are caused by a glance at their lover

that must be why my pages are empty

it matches the contents of my heart

for i do not feel the appeal of being one with another

and alone i will always be

not curious of commitment

but needing it only to conform

I promise I’m trying my best not to back out

and I promise and I promise and I know that you’re okay with me being unsure  

but it feels like I’m just a lost cause waiting for the inevitable day when you see

that this is it

this is all you’re getting from me

it feels like a lie though from day one you knew what you were getting into

and I tell you all the time that I can’t even figure myself out

and you offer to help me solve the puzzle but I don’t understand why you’re so willing

when I give you no guarantees

I guess you must love me

not weighing up the pros and cons like I do

you love unconditionally

like you're supposed to

and I can't help feeling like I'm not holding up my end of the deal

and even though I do all I can

I don’t think I'll ever feel the way that you do  

is that enough for you?

I’m sorry I can’t
feel that way
about you

I wish that you didn’t
feel that way
about me

I'm not gonna lie
I think you're beautiful
Your aesthetic
Quite fine

I feel intrigued when
I stare into your eyes
My heart beats
A little faster each time

But curiously
I don't love you
Or think I do
Or even think I like you

You're just gorgeous
And I want to stare
And smile
But that's it