10:23: Hey, I miss you.
11:47: I hope you're okay.
1:19: Please text me back, I'm worried.
2:10: Come back. Come back. Come back.
3:14: I'm so sorry.
3:26: I love you. Please reply.
3:58: Okay, well I'll be here if you need me.
4:17: I love you.

He never replied, but I'm still waiting.


          

                                 B.S.

Im tired.
I'm really ******** tired.
I'm tired of the lies.
I'm tired of feeling alone.
I'm tired of not being enough.
I'm tired of getting hurt.
I'm tired of being heart broken.
I'm tired of caring too much.
I'm tired of hiding my feelings.
I'm tired of running away.
I'm tired of being used.
I'm tired of being manipulated.
I'm tired of being pushed around.
I'm tired of feeling weighed down.
I'm tired of being me.

I'm
    so
        ****
              tired


                                 B.S.

Standing by, about 10pm
a stranger stood next to me
asked me, from sideways lips
"Did you ever expect this is where we would meet?"
"Nope" I said to the stranger by my side
"I expected no one to come along"
Not interested in a conversation
uncaring where others belong
"Do you think there may be a reason?"
the stranger asks with a sigh
"Nope, not even interested"
as the trains arrival caught my eye
"Oh there's a purpose for my being here"
the stranger tenses muscles that flex and pulse
The train drew near and out of fear
I begged the stranger to get lost
"Leave me alone, I'm going home"
and prepare to depart for the train
that had not quite arrived at the station
no stranger would I permit me to detain
A stranger on a platform held out his hand
and stopped me from stepping onto the tracks
His last words to me as I sprawled on the platform...
"Some actions performed can never be taken back"

I've always had a thing for tales of forbidden love and twisted love stories.

Maybe that's why I've been craving you.


                                 B.S.

I know what you saw when you were seven,
You watched your parents get murdered and go to heaven.
I know what they said about you,
But you know that all of it wasn't true.
You were my best friend.
I loved you until the very end.
you were just 14, confused and all alone.
after I left, we just talked by phone.
After your parents died, you were made fun of, and full of scars.
They didn't know it would go that far.
If I didn't move, If I had stayed,
would you have handled it a different way?
Would you have taken your own life?
instead of yours I wish it was mine.
I remember all our secrets, holding hands
we had a future, we had so many plans.
But now you will be loved, and never forgotten
just because of the killer and those bullies so rotten.
Are you up there with your mom and dad?
I promise to never forget the strong life you had.
I wish I could see you, but you aren't in hell
so after I die we will have no story to tell.
I won't be at your service
"a funeral is for the living, not the dead."
a quote from your favorite movie you said.
Ill miss you, you are forever in my heart
and your suicide has torn me apart.

All are not taken; there are left behind
  Living Belovèds, tender looks to bring
  And make the daylight still a happy thing,
And tender voices, to make soft the wind:
But if it were not so—if I could find
  No love in all this world for comforting,
  Nor any path but hollowly did ring
Where ‘dust to dust’ the love from life disjoin’d;
And if, before those sepulchres unmoving
  I stood alone (as some forsaken lamb
Goes bleating up the moors in weary dearth)
Crying ‘Where are ye, O my loved and loving?’—
  I know a voice would sound, ‘Daughter, I AM.
Can I suffice for Heaven and not for earth?’