packed and left but now people care.
didn't even notice when I was there.

say their goodbyes, farewells, so longs.
doesn't matter that I'm already gone.

now I'm here, and now im alone.
in a new place I have to call home.

starting all over in this new place
all old memories hope not to erase.

and through it all to myself I stay true.
for a wise one once said, hard things I can do.

Recovery is painful
But my mother’s words are like daggers in my chest

Her dietary verses sound all too familiar
She looks at my body as if it were trash

We view my physique the same way, really
I’m either sick or complete flab

I feel myself slipping into old routine
(Although the scale says nothing different)

I feel her fingers rubbing against my wounds
During my daily weigh-in

It’s difficult to love the skin I’m in
When my mother frowns at a larger pair of pants

I did the math and realized I’m forty pounds above my lightest
I’m sure my mother wouldn’t care if I reached that weight again

Not even in the slightest

i'm not myself
i'm somebody else
trapped
or living out a life that isn't or wasn't mine
i don't know

i readily take on forms
and my lips frame words
that are not my shape or thoughts

i'm a product of environment
of culture, of class
i'm chameleonic

don't judge me
i am you

She was the only Non-Native
On staff in a parochial school,
Reservation in Montana...
The school nurse,
Working in her office,
Fighter of colds and flu,
Coverer of scrapes and bruises,
Pre-medicine expert...

A little girl stopped in to say,
"You gonna come to Mass today?"

"No, I'm a Protestant,"

Just then another student walked in:
"You going to Mass?"

"No! She's a *******!"
Said girl one.

And so it goes....

automobile assault again
by
churchlot crasher.
departed, damage done
even
forgoing forgiveness.
grumbling gomez glowers,
haranguing
impossible immunity.
jeez! just...****!
klutzy
lot leaver!
mangled mobility machine
needs
overnight observation.
poignant payment, pending
quixotic
recompensing ravager.
supposing satisfactory salvage.
truck
under
vehicular
warranty.

She's what I long to be.
God brought her to me.
Beautiful, loving and kind.
I'm happy to call her mine.

Daughter my parents never had.
To have her I'm so glad.
She knows just what to say.
No matter what, come what may.

Best friend to call my own.
But the coop she already has flown.
So her wisdom she passes on.
We have a special "sibling" bond.

Although not the same descent.
And our relationship recent.
I am proud to call her.
My favourite older sister.

There's no such thing
As no strings attached
Although your emotions are absent

There's no such thing
As no strings attached
Even though I say I'm fine with these decisions

A baseball glove is your future
But for now I will suture
My body back together

Tying it together with the strings
That should never be attached
To sneaking around

You probably call it *******
While your buddies
Pat you on the back

I thought *** was supposed to be
More than just you and me
Keeping our voices down

How
Do you let me through your window
Just to tell me to get dressed and go?

We were fooling around
But it's different now
That you're playing with my heart