I blacked out in my bed last week, which is almost like falling asleep

until she told me my lips turned blue and my chest stopped dipping

and my head's still spinning trying to imagine the look on her face when she cracked three of my ribs while she begged 911 dispatch to tell her how to make me breathe again

I hate everything about waking up naked tangled up in tubes and wires and a face mask after my little brother dragged me on to the floor so EMT had a clear path to get to me

nothing about this is beautiful anymore
I've got a sick sense of Deja Vu and I still haven't quite caught my breath

At times I wake up
Thinking why the hell did god let me see another day?
I barely pray.
Barely say “dear lord thank you, for blessing me”
Guess I have a purpose
28 years layin down feeling so worthless
Nobody’s perfect
I lashed out at everyone because inside I was hurtin.
Feelin so deserted - needing self glory.
Wondering every **** day
When I die, what was my story?
Was I gift? Sent here to help spread change?
Was I a monster? Sent here to help spread pain.
Maybe I was a non factor and just fell back
Maybe I touched a few hearts...while sadly remaining detached
I don’t kno what it is, nor can I ****** give anymore effort
This world is tough and everyday we all tryna to gain new leverage
I stop to see
What it was that was always in front of me
The open sea.
With endless possibilities…
I see my siblings and watch them go out and fulfill their dreams
I see my friends - growing up and accomplishing all they were meant to be
I see my mother - who pushes on when life gets heavy
I see my soul - who is uncertain yet, claims to remain ready.
But that’s life - it’ll always remain unsteady.
It’ll gas you up, lie to you and even act semi petty.
80 percent is how you react, while 20 percent is what you let in
I’ve let it all come into me - some would call me reactive.
Not many people enjoy you - this trait is not attractive.
Yet, I’m combative - for I am, the way I am and that’s that kid.
I’ve changed so much that I could’ve gotten into fashion
I feel I need a cause for the reason that I am who I am and I’m so tired of askin
God and I just don’t see eye to eye and he no longer understand why I need to cry
When I work out with my demons- thinking that I got stronger
Is it excuse that I wanna die young? Or can I not take it any longer?
Idk, don’t ask such personal questions until you walk a mile in they shoes
Don’t count your wins before your blessing or your destined to lose
Don’t say a rich man means having green in the money holdin machine...
To me success comes from the genuine love within a human being
Or does it.
I’m just tryna stay balanced on this uneven scale
Will I prevail or will I fail?
The clique so you chose the path you’d like to trail
You make the decisions that benefit
Even if they barely fit
Some sweat writing this ****
I’m nervous I’m losing hold and can’t get a grip
While sayin metaphors out these lips
Imma end this small poem here
Just tryna say don’t waste time on what don’t matter
You never know if you’ll see another year
Text someone you love - thank a stranger for holdin the door - tell the broken winged child they can fly and allow your heart to finally soar
Make peace with your demons - try your best to chase your dreams - to make change isn’t always visible - but the act of kindness & love will never remain unseen.

I know what love is.
Love is not when you love someone for what they say
Or how they act;
Love is not when you love someone for what they do
Or how they look.
Love is not a feeling.
Love is not a passion.
Love cannot be spoken,
Nor heard.
Love cannot be given,
Nor taken.
Love is not an emotion,
Nor a vibe.
Love is a force.
Love is loving someone for who they are
Inside and out,
Through and through.
They are that, and that is perfect.
Love is not when that matters more,
But when these matter less.  
Love doesn't wait,
But instead, it lasts.
Don't look for love,
Let it find you.
And believe that it will.

he sniffed her out
she fell for his charm
she fell into his bed
too fast
too fast
passion
or frenzy?

over & over
again & again
he pinned her down
red ribbons,
red dress on the floor

it wasn't sweet
it wasn't sweet
my, what big
teeth you have
what big marks they leave

the sun rose
the moon set
he slept fitfully

bruised, ****** & sore,
she waited

finally he woke &
crunch,
munch
he ate her for lunch

I love
the way
zounds
rhymes with
hounds.
Sadly,
it is not
the sixteenth
century,
and I don't
own dogs.
  - mce

Roses or red
Violets are blue
Our rps are fun
I want nothing new

I hope we are friends,
I hope this is true,
as I always try
to look out for you.

I will never forget
About our little crew,
Fighting many battles
and losing my shoe.

It would break me,
if you said you must bit my adieu,
as so much word and imagination
is what made this rp grew.

All the problems,
I would have never gotten through,
Are all thanks to
little old you.

So come on now,
just me and you,
two phones and two lives,
But one rp is drew.