when all my hopes are broken,
it turns myself into blue
and I'm feeling heartbroken,
this feeling is so true.

listen to the mournful melody
and all the tunes mock at me,
say "I'm not belong to this
as I will worse them all."

tell the stars about my story
and I say do not worry.
as I will be fine,
when the sun starts to shine.

I will wait on the bridge,
waiting to see the last sunrise
and I'll go somewhere sombre,
so I will always be fine.

loving you just like 𝒔𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒔.

I walk into your garden,
all of the flowers are blooming,
butterflies come alive.
it's so breathtaking just your face,
wind kisses my face and makes my heart blooms
and it's the feeling of 𝒔𝒑𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈.

when we hit together,
I can feel your warm breath
just like sun in the summer,
kissing my skin.
I'm melting when I look into your eyes
and it's the feeling of 𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒆𝒓.

dried leaves fall everyday
just like my heart can't stop beating for you.
all I can see is brown and orange and yellow leaves.
even though I can't find the green leaves
but I still have you in my world
and it's the feeling of 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒖𝒎𝒏.

it's cold outside,
but your smile warms my heart
and burns the heat of my body.
everything is white,
feeling cold wind blows towards us.
and yeah, it's the Christmas season.
the 𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒓 season,
the season I walk into your winter wonderland.

the stone that I grabbed had broken,
and I had lost something which was priceless.
words that left in my mind unspoken,
and they said that I was heartless.

the stone couldn't be fixed again,
and I had lost my magical light.
everything was over as nothing could regain,
I regreted that I didn't hold it tight.

finding my hopes in the dark,
but no light to show me the way.
I wanted something which could spark,
but all the stones were far away.

the stone once was my star,
but now it becomes my scar.

To be a poet
Is not to burn the paper with your words
but to be heard
when drifting smoke of love and life is gone
the poet in us carries on
when ink and page and pen are embers
it is the beauty one remembers

oh, what would i not give for you to gut open the poems — gut them out of me. what softness would i not stain? which bones would i not break? i look at my outstretched limbs — look for the parts i wouldn't hurt, but their silence has always been ominous. foreboding. anticipating. like wary, unmoving leaves. like quiet crows. like haunted dusks.

i spin among formless silhouettes. what would i taint?

what would i not?

I once poured my heart out onto some letter
Read it whenever you find yourself reminiscing about your childhood
On my tongue remains those words, the ones we stole from the graves of poets
They try to take shape into conversations, reaching my lips but still falling short
So they live out their days,
Becoming old memories
leaving behind the bitterness of sea salt

Words we never exchanged

Dare I spend my time with you
puncture my soul with your deep breath
feel the pain in your feet
walking the Earth and the universe with such love?

Dare I spend time with you
and risk falling into the abyss of deep sad blue
and losing my self in that fall
all with the chance that I will become
who I was meant to be from the start
of the ***** reaching the ****?

Dare I spend time with you
laying myself out
on the expanse of  your skin
feeling its coarse surface
learning its beautiful layers?

May I have the courage to take this small leap
to find you in the saddest and most joyful places.
If I dare to spend time with you
I will find myself in the strong grasp
of your immense reach.

If Doctor Who wasn't around when I was 6
I wouldn't have ever said "BOWTIES ARE COOL"

If Edgar Allan Poe wasn't a poet that I found when I was 16
I wouldn't have ever read and said "QUOTE THE RAVEN NEVERMORE"

If MrBeast wasn't a youtuber that I became a fan of when I was 17
I wouldn't have a group of people I consider friends

this is love stripped of poetry, so here darling, i might as well just rip out my chest because not loving you is the last act of self-inflicted violence. how i rue the days. i might as well just rip my chest out and give you my heart — burrow your way under my skin, like wood dusts drawn to the wounds in my heels. i will give up poetry to be loved by you in ways not dreamy. in ways raw. sober. aware. unadulterated. lawless. infinite. in intense, longing gazes. in ways that stray from falling apart so beautifully, in such chest-tearing grace. in ways that stain tenderness. in ways that crash and burn.

my love, catch me. watch me tear down the world in the name of your eyes. watch me tear down poetry. i have no need for it.