Life has me in a stranglehold
It's leaving me blue and cold
I'm laying here gasping for air
Wishing out there someone would care
Like a begger on the street
They just hurry past when our eyes meet

No one wants to help the lost
No one wants to pay the cost
No one wants to find whats gone
No one wants to hear that song

The wages of sin is death
It's not all mine, still I'm ******* in my last breath
This may be my dying day
I'm so lost within the fray

I have surly lost my way
In this bottomless hole I'm forced to stay
I'm so very weak
Tears constantly leak
Down my face and to my feet
Trying so desperately my secrets to keep

For one small glance at this darkened hole
Of what use to be my soul
Will make the most courageous man faint
For this life if mine would devastate
Even the most holiest saint

Lonely and withered is how I live my life
Human monsters are my gripe
They have pillaged and stole
They have ripped in me a great big hole
The wounds they've made will never heal
Pleasure of living they surely did steal

So I stay away from all mankind
For my death certificate they have already signed
They just **** me slowly, a piece at a time
One day you'll look, there'll be nothing to find

Little boy blue, for you I blow the horn
I wish you was just lost amongst the corn
But the monster came and snatched your hand
Lead you off to an angry foreign land
I can see you, but can't touch your frozen heart
You was such a loving child at the start
But my little boy has grown into an angry man
Now in this empty field I stand
A trillion tears I've cried for you
Of the loss of my little boy blue
Who's eye's use to look up to me with love
You are my only son sent from above
But now you've gone into the void
Your innocence and ability to love destroyed

What was is like before I fell
Before I ended up in this hell
I don't remember I was only eight
When I got shoved into this fate
Left with feelings of self hate
Human monsters brought me to this gate

The hands of time
They did unwind
It didn't treat me very kind
It brought more monsters and called them mine

Now I'm spinning out of control
Waves of sorrow over me roll
Never knowing which way to go
Should I follow the ******* crow

It would lead me to the grave
You know that is what I crave
There's not much of me to save
For what wasn't stole from me, I gave

Or should I stay in this frozen field
Frozen solid left to deal
Trying to heal what can't be healed
Blinded by my fate, is it sealed

Will any of my tomorrows be kinder
Oh will I grow blinder
By the bites of more sidewinders
Or will I just be thrown into the grinder

I remember mud pies
Chasing fireflies
Lazy summer bike rides
Loved ones that never died
What happened to those things I had before I fell
Before I ended up in this Hell
Can anybody say,can anybody tell

If I die what does it matter
I am already scattered
My minds not here, my heart is shattered
All you see is an empty shell
That by the way has gone through hell

So you can judge on first glance
Before you know me, or give me a chance
I don't really care, they all do
It doesn't reflect on me but you

I know what I am, I'm deppresed and splintered
Upon this bed of torture I've been rendered
Countless times, by countless monsters
Thats how my madness was fostered

So judge my sadness if you want
Or why my face looks so gaunt
You've not been where I have been
And you've not seen what I have seen
True monsters walk this earth
And to me they have given birth

You make happiness look so easy to achieve
It almost makes me believe
That there might be Something more for me
But we where dealt different cards
My problems fiercely followed and bombard
In this harsh game called life
I was dealt from the straight blade knife

Human monster's never claimed you in your youth
Your parents love was only there to sooth
A warm family and many friends
Always greeted you with warm hugs and grins
You never knew loss, only wins
You never seen the circling of shark fins

Don't get me wrong, I don't begrudge your happy life
I'm glad the universe with you had no gripe
I only ask you don't judge where I stand
For human monsters have always had my hand
Dragging me into their agonizing lands
Till I was foever stuck in depressions quicksand

I would just like for you to acknowledge my pain is real
I'm not feeling sorry for myself, this darkness is sealed
It's not make belive in my head, it's the scars on my heart, in my memories, on my skin
The monsters keep coming there is no end

We where delt from diffrent decks
We are nothing but universal specks
You were dealt better cards
Mine from the start was marred
I don't judge or envy you
I don't want sympathy, all I ask is you give me the respect I'm due

Little boy blue, for you I blow the horn
I wish you was just lost amongst the corn
But the monster came and snatched your hand
Lead you off to an angry foreign land
I can see you, but can't touch your frozen heart
You was such a loving child at the start
But my little boy has grown into an angry man
Now in this empty field I stand
A trillion tears I've cried for you
Of the loss of my little boy blue
Who's eye's use to look up to me with love
You are my only son sent from above
But now you've gone into the void
Your innocence and ability to love destroyed

Standing in the shower with my head against the wall
Letting the scalding water fall

Wishing it could wash away my skin
Wishing it could wash away his sins

Maybe when my bruises heal
My soul will once again, begain to feel

It looks so fragile with all it's holes
Where the monsters took and stole

But it's sewed with spiders threads
So it's as strong as a spider's webs

There's really nothing left to say
Except that maybe one of these days
I'm gonna be ok

Standing in the shower with my head against the wall
Letting the scalding water fall

Wishing it could wash away my skin
Wishing it could wash away his sins

Maybe when my bruises heal
My soul will once again, begain to feel

It looks so fragile with all it's holes
Where the monsters took and stole

But it's sewed with spiders threads
So it's as strong as a spider's webs

There's really nothing left to say
Accept that maybe one of these days
I'm gonna be ok

If I die what does it matter
I am already scattered
My minds not here, my heart is shattered
All you see is an empty shell
That by the way has gone through hell

So you can judge on first glance
Before you know me, or give me a chance
I don't really care, they all do
It doesn't reflect on me but you

I know what I am, I'm deppresed and splintered
Upon this bed of torture I've been rendered
Countless times, by countless monsters
Thats how my madness was fostered

So judge my sadness if you want
Or why my face looks so gaunt
You've not been where I have been
And you've not seen what I have seen
True monsters walk this earth
And to me they have given birth