How can you still be happy?
Still?
Oh,  if you only knew
what you don't see
if you looked under the mask,
which no one did,
if only someone noticed
my silent cry
and
listened for a while

I feel that my mask is cracking,
my demons are pushing out,
I've had enough of pretending,
tears are pouring out

I'm afraid to talk about the past
I don't want to reopen those wounds
and go through it all again
Still, I constantly worry about it
I know it will come back
it's just waiting for its time
When I think about it,
my chest hurts,
and my mind won't let me sleep,
analyzing every part of it
I know that when it comes,
I don't want to be alone,
but I don't want to be judged either,
so I prefer to just disappear
I know it will fade away,
but it will come again.