Hopeless sight of the emerald piers
My hazard mind and scattered tears
******* desires forget my strength
Fearing death and life at length
I know little but what I know
Will carry on and forever grow
I've sold my soul and mortal being
To say "yes" without agreeing
I see boats on the horizon sink
And people cower in fear to think
I've seen books burn in great bonfires
And evil men the devil admires
But I'd like to build a Jerusalem with pillars of gold
A place to sin and never grow old
I want more by the day
The impossible, trite, and things I cannot say
Yet I lack for nothing now
Having killed the sacred cow
And finally to stand on the world's end
Crimes behind I cannot amend
And still with tears in my eye
Breathe not a word and quickly die
Hopeless the sight of the emerald piers
My hazard mind and scattered tears

When you die  I want to carry you
Through the lines of tears

And lift you up
On the wings you gave me

There are no oceans but yours
There is no music but your voice

And every day I can hear them well

When you die I want to die with you
And live forever
In the heaven you made

If for all things the sun shines,
How many years will clouded skies be;
In every breath this stubborn heart still beats.

If for all time the tide sways,
This our song is born a river ocean blue,
And one year between a word
be a mountain before the stars.

If one loss is one too many,
Death like desert secures a drought,
And laughless men dream in their chains.

Cold is the night before the day,
If for all things the sun shines,
The sky will clear for none but you.

640

I cannot live with You—
It would be Life—
And Life is over there—
Behind the Shelf

The Sexton keeps the Key to—
Putting up
Our Life—His Porcelain—
Like a Cup—

Discarded of the Housewife—
Quaint—or Broke—
A newer Sevres pleases—
Old Ones crack—

I could not die—with You—
For One must wait
To shut the Other’s Gaze down—
You—could not—

And I—Could I stand by
And see You—freeze—
Without my Right of Frost—
Death’s privilege?

Nor could I rise—with You—
Because Your Face
Would put out Jesus’—
That New Grace

Glow plain—and foreign
On my homesick Eye—
Except that You than He
Shone closer by—

They’d judge Us—How—
For You—served Heaven—You know,
Or sought to—
I could not—

Because You saturated Sight—
And I had no more Eyes
For sordid excellence
As Paradise

And were You lost, I would be—
Though My Name
Rang loudest
On the Heavenly fame—

And were You—saved—
And I—condemned to be
Where You were not—
That self—were Hell to Me—

So We must meet apart—
You there—I—here—
With just the Door ajar
That Oceans are—and Prayer—
And that White Sustenance—
Despair—

Have you ever hated somebody you loved?
Did you ever feel way too smart to be making decisions so dumb?
Have you ever given up, but refused to admit it, so you continued to try?
Have you ever lied to yourself that you're happy, just to mask the undeniable sorrow you feel inside?

Have you ever felt so much for someone, that it's caused you to become numb?
Have you ever tried to win somebody's heart when you know they don't have one?
Did you ever know you were the cause that things ended in ruins, but you were still hoping that you weren't the reason why?
Have you ever ignored the sad and bitter truth that was impossible to deny?

Have you ever tried to maintain your composure only for the one that you love, in hopes that they'll stop being the one that's making you come undone?
Have you ever fought to prove and convince to your love that you're not anything like the demons they've been with, that you've slowly become?
Was there ever a time you felt so lost that you tried doing things in reverse, only to make them worse,
when your only intention was to try and make them right?
Did you ever pretend that things could be like they used to,
Just to maybe see any hope in the future,
When you know that hope will always be out of sight?

Have you ever tricked yourself into feeling better by thinking your pain is at an end, and finally done,
Only to realize that the real pain hasn't even begun?
Have you ever wrongfully blamed the only one that gave your life meaning, for being the one that ****** the meaning out of your life?
Have you ever tried to fix your situation, by purposely making it worse, and embracing a bitter hatred that you never thought you would come by?

...I have...

Will it be too late when I finally stop hating the one that I love?
Or will I continue to let them push me to end it myself and be done?
Why can't I stop confusing true beauty from spite, and just admit I wasn't right?
...Just admit I wasn't right.
I need to stop seeing things backwards and finally realize...
that you can't **** spiders,
by stepping on butterflies.